K.J Posted January 10, 2003 Share Posted January 10, 2003 Hi, posted here before, I have this best friend we have been best of friend sence we were in grade 6, we are now both 32 anyways I moved away and have recently moved back after 17 years aways from eachother. I came back here because I feel that this is my home, I brought my kids here and left the hubby behine(bad relationshiop anyways) I am very happy out here excepot for it makes me very frustrated to hear about what my friend is going through in her relationships, she has been m,arried and that had failed she has been dating this guy for about a year and he is very cautious with her, she has met someone else, She messes around with him and calls him all the time, well today her b/f called her at work and told her that someone has seen her in the bar with the other guy, she came back to her desk and was madder and felt that he had no right saying the things that he was saying. I have been telling her that what she is doing is really wrong and is not good and that she has to make up her mind on what she wants to do, the other guy knowsabout her b/f and is determned to break them up, O.M.G. ALL SHE THINKS ABOUT IS THIS IS A GAME!!!!! I feel at times really bad that i am her friend because of the way that she is acting. I am not like this at all, i am a loyal person that cares about other people but I am feeling terable about loving her(as friends) I have tried to tell her this and I have told her that no matter what I do not want to hear about it anymore. I roll my eyes, I do not respond to her when she talks about it because she can not see that everyone is getting hurt because of her. I do not know anymore how to tell her that she is so wrong. I dfo not know how to deal with this, I do work with her now and I have to hear about it all the time, she calls me on my extention and I just tell her that i have calls to take and can not chat. everyone at work knows about this and we are all trying to tell her thats it's just wrong. I do not want my friendship to die because of this but how can I tell her in not suck a harsh way? I am rude to her now when she talks about it. all help thanked so much K.J Link to post Share on other sites
Tolkien Posted January 10, 2003 Share Posted January 10, 2003 "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't...... " when you fill that in, i think you will learn my point. The most effective way to go about bringing change, in fact it's more then 50% effective vs. any other method, is to Lead by Example Get a b/f, go on a double date (if they are still together) and show them how much fun you are having, how happy you are, etc... etc... Whatever she gets out of cheating on this guy, show her that the same thing can be gotten out of a normal relationship, sometimes even better! Well.... I really have no idea what I am talking about, so that's just my two cents :-p Link to post Share on other sites
K.J Posted January 10, 2003 Share Posted January 10, 2003 added info on the situation, the one that she is messing around with is my b/f's friend. and I asked if we could all go out one nihgt she said no problem (with the one that she is with in a relationsh not my b/f's friend. thank you, I did finish that ...lol Link to post Share on other sites
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