Melmanandgloria Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 I feel attracted to my boss - yes I know cliche - I think we have a bit of flirty banter between us and when I look into his eyes I get the feeling it's mutual and there is a spark. I told him a while ago I was going to maybe go for another job as I want more etc, and maybe he would get somebody who fits in (two people I work with are awful) he said well you fit in with me and didn't want me to go, but understands people will need to progress and I think was a little surprised. Anyway I decided after looking at the job it wasn't for me and told him I wouldn't be applying and he said he was relieved - I'm not irreplaceable by any means. I think sometimes he likes me and then other times I think you stupid person get a grip. He laughs at most things I say and seems at ease with me, then again I think he seems at ease with most people. There's odd comments I pick up on like he was supposed to be working from home but decided he would be coming in and said I enjoy your company, - I Want to believe he likes me but then I think I am reading too much into things. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Confused9999 Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Is he married? Has he made any sexual or flirty comments? Has he implied anything beyond just work? Have you had lunch alone or dinner alone with him? I have female employees working for me and enjoy some of their company and enjoy flirting with them more then my male employees, but doesn't mean I want anything more. Keep in mind.. Having an affair with your boss is a lose lose... If/when things go bad you WILL have to leave to another job. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
MaggieNilson Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Sounds like he likes you at some level -- probably just as a coworker or friend at least. Or maybe he is attracted to you. There is no way tp know. The question you meed to be asking yourself is why do you even care? Why would you even entertain or consider having a relationship with a married man? Your priority should be doing your jov and keeping boundaries in place. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
privategal Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Its in your head. Get it together he is married. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Hi. The most important question is 'Is he married?'. Is he an available man? How old is he? How old are you? If he's married STOP these thoughts!! REALLY?!? Read around this forum or ANY forum where OW talk about the pain of being a mistress. Adultery causes devastation for everyone no matter how it turns out. You truly don't want to go there. If he is a single, available man.... We all know that work place relationships are generally a really bad idea, particularly with your boss! It could damage both of your careers. I need to confess that I met my husband at work! We were very young & worked in very different departments though. If we had split-up I would never of had to see him again. How long have you worked there? How long have you known him? Does he have a reputation? My advise is forget about it & if you're more emotionally invested than you say find a new job. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Melmanandgloria Posted May 31, 2016 Author Share Posted May 31, 2016 No he's not married - I am though 1 Link to post Share on other sites
privategal Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 No he's not married - I am though Why are you asking this if you have read here and are married? Do you want encouragement to cheat with your boss? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
PinkSunset Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 I met my MM through work but thankfully we don't work for the same company or office or it would be much harder. We have seen an inter-office relationship at my office between one of the upper managers and a single woman. We could always tell when it was off because they wouldn't go to lunch together and would avoid each other. You could tell when it was on because they would be working closely and always, always go to lunch together. Anyway, one day he didn't come into work and was gone for two weeks and the day after that she put in her notice. I am guessing DDay happened because by the time he got back she was gone, and his wife started picking him up from work. Point is: All of us knew. Stay away from office romances, even if you're single! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 .....So now the questions become 'What's wrong with your marriage?', 'Are you getting close to divorce?', 'What steps have to taken to fix the problems & do you want to fix them?'. Do you have any children? Has there been any infidelity in your marriage, you or your husband? Please think about this. It's so much easier to fix a marriage BEFORE adultery than after. A 'civilized' divorce is more possible without adultery. The agony & utter devastation that you would cause your husband is horrific! Read around this forum & the infidelity one. It's a good idea to understand what you're contemplating by asking the questions in your OP. It's GREAT that you're here BEFORE anything has happened. There are many wayward spouses (WS) & mistresses/other women (OW) here who wish they had been in your situation. Knowing & getting advise BEFORE they destroyed their lives. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted May 31, 2016 Share Posted May 31, 2016 Beware of fantasies that get out of control. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 1, 2016 Share Posted June 1, 2016 No he's not married - I am though All the more reason to stay away from your boss. Is risking your marriage and family life as you know it worth it? Let alone your professional reputation would be at risk. Your ego wants to know if he's into you...It really doesn't matter because you have a husband. Are you looking for an affair? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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