lindslax Posted January 12, 2014 Share Posted January 12, 2014 (edited) I am a new Physical Therapist at one of clinics in the area. We recently had a Christmas Party that was at a bar. Of course, there was alcohol served (stereotypical, right?). I went by myself since I had no date, figuring I would just network. I walked into the bar, and as I was walking in there was this extremely good looking guy walking in with his friend behind me. I didn't think much at first, just a good looking guy... until I saw him in bar with the rest of our company. I saw my coworkers, and sat down and socialized. I kept my eye on him throughout the night, and I even asked a coworker who the good looking guy was, he is one of the Clinic Directors at one of our clinics. He is not married, and only a few years older than me. I'm 27 and he's 29. I found out that he had quite a reputation of "sleeping around" so I'm like, hmmm...definitely, not sleeping with him. As the night progressed my coworkers left, I decided to stay and hang with my friend that lived in the area. I thought the Clinic Director was going to leave, since most of the company had left, but stayed with his friend throughout the night. After, some drinking and bumping into, I noticed he was standing close to where I was standing and dancing and when I went to order drinks and went to use the bathroom, he would strike up small comments to me, which at first I didn't acknowledge. I began to become tipsy and danced with my friends and eventually him and I started talking. I told him he could have any girl in the place, he simply said "I caught his eye, and he only had eyes for me and loved how I looked and how fit I am". I was flattered but the comment kind of sounded so stereotypical. Not once did he tell me what his position was with the company, we did make fun of where we worked but we didn't talk about work after that. We danced, talked and eventually he leaned in for a kiss in which I returned back. He stayed all night with his friend, he grabbed my hand to take me to order me a drink, and when him and his friend came to leave, he asked me to hangout with them..I cordially apologized and said "no". And he insisted on staying with me, and I said "Bros before hoes", I even mentioned it to his friend that I wanted him to leave with him because it is "bros before hoes", his friend said he's never had a girl say that and high fived me and said "do you blame the guy for trying". I never gave the Clinic Director my cell number, because I wanted to play hard to get, but at the same time... to see if it was mere drunk talking. He knows which location I work and my first name.. but I don't know if he will remember that come, Monday. I'm curious, if he would even remember who I am when we go back to work on Monday, after the party. Like I said, he works at a different location than I do. If he was interested, which I am unsure, if he would try to figure out who I am... or if I'm just that one girl that he saw at the company's Christmas party who he tried to take home and sleep with but didn't. Him and his friend stayed until last call, and left.. I just would like some advice if he will even remember after that night, from a guy's stand point if anyone has been in that situation, how you reacted or what not. Thanks!! Edited January 12, 2014 by lindslax 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted January 13, 2014 Share Posted January 13, 2014 I couldn't get past the bros before hoes...a professional woman should not be using such juvenile terms in description at a workplace party regardless of alcohol. I was in the military and we did not say stuff like that at professional events, and we are notorious for being crass...curse like a Sailor. He sounds like a player (hard to believe this man was a Director, someone is yanking your chain) and you sound like a high schooler trying to over impress the bros by acting like one of us...guys don't really like girls who act like buddies. They will screw you but they won't like you. He probably thought he was going to get some of that, and now that he didn't he won't give you a second thought. Do not act like this ever again if you want to be taken seriously in your career. It is time to grow up, instead of trying to grow a pair to fit in with badly behaved men. SMH! G 2 Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted January 13, 2014 Share Posted January 13, 2014 (edited) a side-piece, this is what you want, okay, but I would ask any married guy to come back single, or bed him once just for the sex, you will not get promoted necessarily, skill makes that happen, though Grumps is right prolly and the guy is lying, but look, he must like his home and marriage or he would move out, would have already Edited January 13, 2014 by darkmoon 1 Link to post Share on other sites
regine_phalange Posted January 13, 2014 Share Posted January 13, 2014 I think that getting drunk and kissing the director in your new job's party is not very good for your reputation (even if you are very good at your job). Be careful. There is a lot of sexism already in various fields of work. Unfortunately, we, as women, have to be very grounded and sober in such situations. Work parties? Yes. But drinking and kissing with colleagues (even distant ones)? I'd say no. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted January 14, 2014 Share Posted January 14, 2014 Christmas party shenanigans are best left where they are: in the past. Forget it and focus on your job. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
czanclus Posted January 21, 2014 Share Posted January 21, 2014 I don't think it's too big a deal that you used a phrase 'bros before hoes' to someone who behaves without much class himself. As for his interest in getting to know you, I personally would not hold my breath. He does not seem like the kind of man that is interested in relationships - just fly-by sex with no emotional involvement. Link to post Share on other sites
Secret Advisor Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 ....stays at the Christmas Party. Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 (edited) I am a new Physical Therapist at one of clinics in the area. We recently had a Christmas Party that was at a bar. Of course, there was alcohol served (stereotypical, right?). IDK. Never been invited to a Christmas party. Edited January 22, 2014 by skydiveaddict Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 I'm sorry but your career and promotion chances just went down the pan at this point, We danced, talked and eventually he leaned in for a kiss in which I returned back. I would leave and get a job at a clinic where the staff act like adults. Link to post Share on other sites
Jenna25 Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 Hi. I know I'm new here and everything, but what's with the "bros before hoes"? I get that you wanted to tell the guy that he should hang out with his friend, but using that language in professional enviorement...not sure it's the right move. Anyway, it seems like you had fun and that's good. You should approach the guy the next time you meet and either give him you number or invite him for a cup of coffee. Let him know that you are hard to get, but not too hard, Tease, but not too much XoXo Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 Are you hoping he'll come find you or call you? How about an update to this thread. Anyway, the guy is a player, he likes to sleep around. What are you hoping to have happen? Fling? Ego feed? Try to woo this guy and tame him into a relationship with you? Link to post Share on other sites
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