oguraja Posted August 5, 2003 Share Posted August 5, 2003 Actually i was working in two jobs because of my lack of selfconfident , i lost one job and now im doing one job and im earning less amount. So i feel some what depressed . This stops me to do the work and also to study. I really feel like jumping out of this world and die. I really need somebody to boost my inner spirits. otherwise i will still beome worse and loose my way in life please somebody help me Link to post Share on other sites
my_mother's_daughter Posted August 5, 2003 Share Posted August 5, 2003 Geteiltes Leid ist halbes Leid!! Is the loss of one of your jobs the major problem here, or did you lose the job because you are feeling low and depressed and lacking in self confidence? I know it's a bit confusing to write in Englisch, but if what you are asking is related to self confidence, you could try this recent thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=98288#post98288 Carly makes some great points. If however your problem is different, then share more of it here... Link to post Share on other sites
Author oguraja Posted August 5, 2003 Author Share Posted August 5, 2003 The topic u have showed me some what related. But i am in a worse situation than this. Whenever i look at people who are confident i really thrive to become like them. But couldnt do that. whenever a task is given i really fear that i couldnt do that task. i really do all my real life things in the same manner. So that really shows i have inferiority complex and lack of self confidence. This really hinders me in doing things in life. Further i dont know how to move with people because for nearly 18 years i had same friends and place . So i never had a change in my life. But now i m in a place , which i dont know anything about the language(german) and the people(including my country colleagues. Each have different characters. But i couldnot mive with them properly. so there are lot of problems with me can anyone pls help me to get out of this Link to post Share on other sites
my_mother's_daughter Posted August 5, 2003 Share Posted August 5, 2003 Don't want to jump in too deep here, but I used to work in mental health and it sounds like you could possibly benefit from CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) It's not as scary as it sounds it's just a therapy which looks at the reasons for (mainly negative) thoughts and behaviour patterns and seeks to address them. Do a yahoo search for CBT, really though it is a therapy which produces the best results when treated with a therapist. This isn't so invasive as I'm making this sound(!!) but if your lack of confidence is so bad, it wouldn't hurt. Also keep in mind that you're adjusting to a new country and culture, but if, as you say, this is a problem you've lived with for a really long time, then sounds like you need a proactive approach. Don't suffer when there is help out there. It works. Link to post Share on other sites
longlegzs80 Posted August 6, 2003 Share Posted August 6, 2003 I find it very hard to give you positive feedback when I feel the same way. But if self confidence is what you lack and is affecting your performance at jobs, you definitly need to figure out what you need to change about yourself and what's in your life. With what it sounds like, it sounds like you need to be surrounded by people who are positive. THis will help in a sense with the self confidence thing, but other then that, you just have to get in there and fake it. I will soon enough be in the graphic design field and I am scared. THe lack of self confidence in my work is definitly making me hide from potential jobs, and the lack of speaking positive. But you just have to get it together and find ways of improving your self confidence. One thing I highly suggest is to surround yourself with positive people. And if that does not work for you, learn how to fake it. IT is hard, I know, I go through the same thing, but you just have to go out and do it. Link to post Share on other sites
superd Posted August 6, 2003 Share Posted August 6, 2003 If the two jobs are making you feel like jumping into a river, maybe you need to drop one of them until you are more stable and worry about making alot of money when you can handle it, that is if you can get by without that extra money and still survive, if not your kind of stuck. Also about your depression and self-confidence issues, they are not going to go away by sitting in the house, find some/any kind of support group and get involved with people. You can even take a class to learn German or something, I know that private language schools are becoming a big thing because everybody immigrates everywhere nowadays. That would be a good way to make friends. Link to post Share on other sites
my_mother's_daughter Posted August 6, 2003 Share Posted August 6, 2003 Good point superd, forgot about the language issue. You know, oguraja, I don't know whereabouts in Deutschland you are, but most towns have a VHS (Volkshochschule) which is like a school for adults and they all offer German for foreigners classes. They're usually really cheap as I believe the government partially funds them. Look for a "Deutsch als Fremdsprache kurs" or "Deutsch für Anfänger" at your local VHS. Would be a good way to get to know people too. I imagine most of the courses will begin in September, so perfect timing!! Link to post Share on other sites
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