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Using prayer as a cop out


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Old 29th March 2017, 10:45 AM   #1
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Question Using prayer as a cop out

There's a friend of mine that helps lead a Bible study and has a long time female friend that he's been trying to get her to attend. She already has a home church, but this particular Bible study is geared towards singles. She is single herself and she told me he's been trying to get her to go.

Chances are he probably has a crush on her, and keeps being persistent about it.

I asked her, "Why not go? Try it out...see what happens"

Her: "I'll pray about"

I found this rather ironic that she needed to pray about attending an already Biblical function, but to me, that's just an excuse that she simply has no desire to go. It's like passing off your action/behavior of simply not wanting to go onto the will of God.

I knew of a woman who made her decision to drop out of college because she "prayed about it an God told her she should drop out."

It seems this is an overused phrase when you're asking a friend (Christian friend) for advice...so rather getting legitimate feedback from them, they bow out of the conversation altogether, pat you on the back, and say, "pray to God about it, brother!"

I don't get this overuse of this phrase. What gives?
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Old 29th March 2017, 11:24 AM   #2
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She was politely telling you she isn't interested.
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Old 29th March 2017, 2:48 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LookAtThisPOst View Post
I don't get this overuse of this phrase. What gives?

I know exactly what you are talking about. And if we don't really know the person too well, then it's extra tough to determine if they are being legit or not.

If they are being legit, then it's just to make sure they don't act too quickly, and to make sure it's appropriate to go forward with whatever issue they are dealing with.

If they are not being legit, they have found a spiritual phrase that is their "wild-card" --- they can get out of a lot by simply saying they need to pray about it.
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Old 29th March 2017, 3:12 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by LancasterAmos1966 View Post
I know exactly what you are talking about. And if we don't really know the person too well, then it's extra tough to determine if they are being legit or not.

If they are being legit, then it's just to make sure they don't act too quickly, and to make sure it's appropriate to go forward with whatever issue they are dealing with.

If they are not being legit, they have found a spiritual phrase that is their "wild-card" --- they can get out of a lot by simply saying they need to pray about it.
Yeah, probably also comes in handy for break-ups.
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Old 29th March 2017, 3:16 PM   #5
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i feel that god particularly wants us to use our own agency in our lives.....i often talk to god when making a decision....what i say to myself without anyone else knowing is god guide me let it be good..........or help me god im not sure ...and i will work through it....and make decisions on the spot.....i normally say if i am hesitant im going to need some some to time to think about it....and me thinking...is normally going ok..... dad im stuck help me out.and trying to be still enough to hear the reply...that takes time......

.i dont have to tell other people that though...


if its big life changing...i cant decide on the spot...i have family to consider but to attend anything spiritual..its almost always a yes for me.....i dont understand why it would be a decision she had to pray about unless she had other prior commitments or activities she attends that may take her to burn out capacity.....she might need to think and pray so she can juggle her time...i think its everyones right to decide what deserves a prayer and what doesnt...thats why god gave us free choice...to make our own minds up on whats right and wrong to do......and i guess when to pray and who to tell that you need to pray for an answer...its all personal..............deb
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Last edited by todreaminblue; 29th March 2017 at 3:20 PM..
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Old 29th March 2017, 3:42 PM   #6
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I watched Oprah once. She said it's a great line to avoid being put on the spot having to give an answer immediately. It has the same meaning as "let me sleep on it"
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Old 29th March 2017, 5:12 PM   #7
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I bet that if you listened to God, you would understand the power of praying about something.

With that said, I'm sure many people falsely hide behind that phrase, just like all religion can be used perversely.
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Old 29th March 2017, 7:22 PM   #8
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Why do you think it's a "cop out" when a person believes or acts differently than you? That said, possibly she was just trying to get you to stop bothering her about why she didn't want to go with this friend. How is this your business?
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Old 30th March 2017, 5:20 AM   #9
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God talks to each one of us in many ways. I don't think people would use those words just to get out of things. Really can't say that though. We all have the right to say what we are hearing in our thoughts. Believe in the lord and believe you are being directed to your fullness from the heart, mind and body. Amen.
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Old 30th March 2017, 5:26 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by todreaminblue View Post
i feel that god particularly wants us to use our own agency in our lives.....i often talk to god when making a decision....what i say to myself without anyone else knowing is god guide me let it be good..........or help me god im not sure ...and i will work through it....and make decisions on the spot.....i normally say if i am hesitant im going to need some some to time to think about it....and me thinking...is normally going ok..... dad im stuck help me out.and trying to be still enough to hear the reply...that takes time......

.i dont have to tell other people that though...


if its big life changing...i cant decide on the spot...i have family to consider but to attend anything spiritual..its almost always a yes for me.....i dont understand why it would be a decision she had to pray about unless she had other prior commitments or activities she attends that may take her to burn out capacity.....she might need to think and pray so she can juggle her time...i think its everyones right to decide what deserves a prayer and what doesnt...thats why god gave us free choice...to make our own minds up on whats right and wrong to do......and i guess when to pray and who to tell that you need to pray for an answer...its all personal..............deb
I think one of the deterrents that keep her from attending is that there's too many women than there are men. I recall being part of a Meetup group for Christian singles that was a startup. I was the only male in the group at the first Meetup. Ever since then people started dropping like flies. lol

What keeps me from going is the fact that the last group that was run by the same person fizzled out almost as quickly as it started. Also, that area of the community kind of has a cliquish, fishbowl community mentality.

I actually found some articles online talking about how these singles groups at churches to have a short lifespan. Already in two major churches in the area had singles ministries no longer exist and thus people (single people) from said churches started using other online social media platforms to find methods of bringing people together outside of the church.

Some base their attendance on whether or not the people attending are even date-able or seen as futures spouses. She did mention she is concerned about how she is "fed" her knowledge, so maybe that's where they prayer lies with her? Maybe the venue for this new singles Bible study would be breaking the routine of her home church in which she's been attending.

Some have no qualms of leaving their "church going" church that doesn't cater to singles and attend a church as a visitor of sorts to churches that have single sponsored events.

Last edited by LookAtThisPOst; 30th March 2017 at 5:42 AM..
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