Bobbi7 Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 Isn't being in a relationship having to be social 99% of the time? If someone isn't social in a relationship-then how does one even stay in it and remain interested? Anybody is replaceable. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 I used to be very shy, but I was very sociable too, just happy to be around people without ever being the centre of attention. 'Shy' and 'social' aren't mutually exclusive. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bobbi7 Posted May 18, 2015 Author Share Posted May 18, 2015 Ok, so Shy, introverted, Mute, are different things? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted May 18, 2015 Share Posted May 18, 2015 Isn't being in a relationship having to be social 99% of the time? If someone isn't social in a relationship-then how does one even stay in it and remain interested? Anybody is replaceable. Nope......... TFY 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Syberia Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 Not sure I understand your question. Even if you're shy, so long as you're able to get the relationship started, you get comfortable and open up with your SO. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
leavesonautumn Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 I'm pretty shy and quiet but I also observe people a lot or "study" them before opening up. With my current boyfriend, he just made me feel so comfortable and he was so sweet that I had no problem asking him out. With some people, you just meet and instantly click and I'd say the majority of relationships start out that way. I'm shy around my boyfriend's friends but he's social enough for the both of us and as I spend more time with people, the more comfortable I get. I don't like putting the pressure on extroverted people to get me to open up so sometimes I do force myself to not be so shy all the time. Being in a relationship for an introvert or someone who is shy is easier than dating. I don't believe in soul mates but I do believe in kindred spirits and some people just fit so well together with no explanation. I'm probably going further then what you're asking but people are so complex. No one is just "shy" and that's the only facet of their personality. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 Ok, so Shy, introverted, Mute, are different things? Yes, they are different things. Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 Anybody is replaceable. No. Nobody is replaceable. Everyone is unique, one of a kind. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
GravityMan Posted May 20, 2015 Share Posted May 20, 2015 Shyness is not binary. It exists on a spectrum, or a continuum. And it can fluctuate. The degree of shyness can vary based on a lot of different internal and external factors. For example, many shy people are very sociable around people they connect well with, such as their close friends and their significant other. Some shy people are the type that are initially reserved but eventually open up. Some people show their nervousness by being very chatty, not quiet. Most adults who are shy are mildly shy. Many of them have had relationships and marriages, and are good with kids. Some have led teams; some have held high-ranking management and supervisory positions and have performed well in those roles. In short, their mild shyness is a non-issue most of the time. Severe shyness in adults is rare. It's a bit more common in young kids under the age of 8 or so, but the norm is to overcome or at least lessen the severity once they grow up a bit...e.g. while they're in high school or college. It may improve organically by itself with age, or it may get better with some support and encouragement from the right people and life experiences, or he/she may just have some sort of epiphany one day. It often coincides with not worrying so much about what others think. Yes, being social to some extent is important...but the overwhelming majority of people will have at least one relationship in their lifetimes. Including the vast majority of shy men and women. OP, that should tell you that being constantly social isn't the end-all-be-all. Odds are, most of those folks unexpectedly met their special someone and they just clicked, period. If, during a silent period, a couple is still comfortable and not awkward in each other's company...that's probably a sign that they click well with each other. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SpiralOut Posted May 21, 2015 Share Posted May 21, 2015 Being shy doesn't mean that you don't like talking to people or don't know how to be sociable. It means that it takes time to open up to people. Most shy people, like myself, are talkative once we really get to know someone. Shy people can have good friends they talk to easily and feel comfortable around, yet feel nervous around new people. Also, there are plenty of people who find shyness cute in a partner. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RoseVille Posted May 21, 2015 Share Posted May 21, 2015 Ok, so Shy, introverted, Mute, are different things? Yes, very different things. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 21, 2015 Share Posted May 21, 2015 Ok, so Shy, introverted, Mute, are different things? Wait what? I hope this is a joke... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 well shyness, social-awkwardness, will obviously hurt your chances, screw you more if you are a guy instead of a girl Link to post Share on other sites
gemo-opus Posted May 28, 2015 Share Posted May 28, 2015 people conflate shy with reserved......i don't think many people are genuinely shy. Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted May 28, 2015 Share Posted May 28, 2015 So I agree - first off I hope the "Mute" thing was a joke. Second - yes - shyness is not an issue. nor is it the same thing as introverted either. While many shy people are "introverted", not all introverts are "shy". Look up the book - "quiet - the power of ...in a world that can't stop talking". We live in a society where wealth is generated through buzz and through gossip and where you're only considered "smart" and successful by our unfortunately widely held popular culture if you suffer from verbal diarrhea. Hey, I've worked enough jobs to know that the person doing the most talking is probably a know-it-all or knows **** which neither is good for. Third, as several people pointed out, shyness exists on a sliding scale - one that varies on people present, location, etc. Fourth - I hope the last line was a joke too. Wanna know why FIFA is corrupt, why people hide millions of dollars in Switzerland or the Caymans, why the Republican leadership try and convince every idiot out their that they'll get rich too if we elect them - it's because too many people live without morals, without a sense of when enough is enough - particularly with out time, money, and relationships. Relationships are a choice. Of course you could replace someone. And they could just as easily replace your ass. relationships are about commitment, sacrifice, communication, and experiencing life together. Link to post Share on other sites
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