Must hide how I feel

[4givrnt4gtr]

So, apparently I whine too much, or so my husband said and now has been more adamant about making fun of me when I do it.

 

This makes me feel bad, though I sorta agree with him. I wish I could stop but even when I'm not talking I know most of my thoughts are complaining about this or that. Something always hurts, or Im tired, or its too cold.

 

Today for instance we were talking about something silly, the contacts on my phone. I said that I've erased the ones I don't need several times but they keep popping back up, and then I said that this also happens to my iTunes music. I didn't think I was complaining, I though I was just, I don't know..sharing? discussing? I don't know.

 

In any case his response was something along the lines of a mocking "oh poor you". It hurt my feelings and I felt shut down and patronized but I felt like maybe I do complain too much to the point that Im not even aware of it anymore.

 

I tried to let it go and we agreed to meet for lunch. He came and I went out without a jacket. I was determined to not complain so when I stepped outside and it was cold I tried to not say anything but my shivers kind of gave me away. He asked if I rather be inside and I said no that I was fine. I felt like I can't say anything negative or say I am uncomfortable because it will be seen like Im complaining.

 

This isn't the first time someone says I complain too much and it worries me. IT feels like complaining or stating discomfort is very natural to me and to not do it make me feel fake, like I'm pretending to be happier than I am. I hate it.

 

Any thoughts on how I can reduce my complainy tendencies?

[whichwayisup]

Give yourself a time limit each day to complain, then push yourself to be positive. Keep the blah thoughts to yourself. instead of talking about it, post here. Or start a daily journal on your computer and vent out what you are feeling and why.

 

Be aware of the negatives you feel and think before you speak. It really isn't "fun" to be around someone who complains all the time.

This isn't the first time someone says I complain too much and it worries me. IT feels like complaining or stating discomfort is very natural to me and to not do it make me feel fake, like I'm pretending to be happier than I am. I hate it.

The thing is, people will tolerate it a bit. It's natural to complain, but not as often as you do. Even though you feel fake sucking it up and pretending you're happy, eventually by doing that you'll actually feel better and focus on other things, rather than on what you feel and it being about you and what you feel and why.

Edited January 30, 2015 by whichwayisup