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-   -   Love Addiction (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/addiction-recovery/635476-love-addiction)

AndreaItalian 20th September 2017 4:26 AM

Love Addiction
 
Hello everybody,

I think it's time for me to open my self up and try to heal for good.
I suffer from love addiction. I love too much my partners and I become sort of needy. I'm an insecure person. This is mainly due to the fact that I'm not a particular attractive guy and i suffered a lot being alone during my teenage years.

Whenever i started a relationship to me it felt like magic, like the movies
than after some time my partner always leave.

It is so painful to see people you love go away from your life. I feel miserable and depressed. This should be the time i focus on my self but i can't find any stimulus to do anything.

When i was in love i was so energetic and happy.

Now the only thought i have is tha the cure for my pain is another love.

But it's never been easy for me to attract women. Never easy to start a relationship. It always happened out of luck.

I'm scared to death i won't find anyone. i'm scared if i find someone it's not going to last.

It is so frustratring because everybody around me seems to have relationshio all figure out

Eight 21st September 2017 5:36 PM

First of all, if you spend some time reading these forums you will see pretty quickly that almost NO ONE has relationships figured out.

Second, relationships that you persue tend to start out feeling like the movies. That's a chemical response in your brain. Yes, you are energetic and happy. It's like being high all the time. It's biology. It also doesn't last. Eventully it goes away and you are left with reality. At this point, maybe the two year mark or so, people usually either break up or continue on.

You first need to be happy being alone, with yourself. Once you can love who you are, you will attract someone who also loves you for who you are. Don't be "scared to death." Being in a relationship is not the be all end all to life. There's a lot of the world out there and being "in love" is only one part of life's many experiences.

When you stop looking you'll find what you are looking for.

One last thing. I have a neighbor who most wouldnt consider conventionally attractive. He's extrememly overweight, smokes, is disheveled looking most of the time, not fashionable at all. Yet the first time I met him, there was a confidence about him that actually negated all of the physical attributes. He was charming and confident and sure of himself. I've seen him meet an attractive woman at a cafe and within an hour they are leaving together. So don't say you aren't attractive. It's what's on the inside that matters the most. Truly.

Best wishes.

submart 29th September 2017 7:03 PM

The best medication for you is to build yourself esteem while you are single. Make an appointment to see a clinical psychologist.

Other ways to build you self-esteem:
1. Exercise
2. Eat healthy
3. Use positive self-talk
4. Advance in your career or go to school
5. Accomplish a goal any goal.


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