scobro Posted July 8, 2014 Share Posted July 8, 2014 Wanted to hear from people who have quit and how you stayed sober. A little about me.......I have been a binge drinker all my life (43).I can have 2 and stop but I drink to get drunk and can't stop.It has effected my life, lost relationships,embarrassed people etc etc.I got 3 DUI's lost my driving license for life.I have been to AA,addiction centres,and one on one counsel, and the only person who can help you is you is what I believe.I just came off the worst drinking binge in my life this last week.I have an ex that triggers my urge to drink but I also use it as an excuse,which binge drinkers do.We got in an argument.I drank for 5 days straight no food just wake up drink until I puke then continue until passed out and in those drunken days texted and emailed my ex the most nasty insults to the point her friend called and said stop and my ex finally text and said its a final warning or the police will get involved. I was hung over for the last 5 days depressed,embarrassed,ashamed,suicidal and missing my ex and hating my life which is easy because I am unemployed and on assistance.I spent money that was not mine but didn't care, plus my monthly allowance from the Gov't. I now have 11 bucks to last 27 days all because of a binge. I finally realized its not worth it anymore or I will be in my 50s alone in a room doing the same thing, binge by myself alone full of regret of a wasted life and wake up really hung over or still drunk and start drinking again until I puke then keep going till I pass out. I am not some loser bum I am a good looking guy,attract women and a former professional musician, bodybuilder, personal trainer from a good family, but alcohol has ended me in jail, homeless shelters and horrible situations of regret. Like passing out at a Christmas dinner my head on my plate of food in front of people only my dad knew.Throwing up on a manager at a work Christmas party.Being at a my clients house for dinner and drinks with my girlfriend and falling down into a glass table and countless other embarrassing moments.All those incedents I pre-drink then arrive buzzed.I still chose not to stop, so death is really my only way if I dont choose to stop myself. I have done the AA meetings, addiction centres and one on one councel but the only person that can fix me is me, and its the old saying you have to want to stop.I hit rock bottom and stopped for a while but its the starting back up again that kills the sobriety. Any advice on how to stay sober??? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
melodicintention Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 Attack the real problem, which is depression. This means counseling and therapy to reach down inside and fix the broken machinery. You would likely benefit from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to help quit drinking, as well as to help relearn thought processes that keep leading you to be unhappy and therefore choose to medicate yourself with another drink. You are using alcohol to medicate yourself. You also have to decide at some point that you are done drinking. If you want to stop, you will. But right now deep down you don't really want to. It would be ideal to quit, but not so much that you have been able to. This is why you need help to find out what is driving you to drink, then once you understand that you will find the key to begin loosing the desire to drink at all as you find peace within. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
EverLastluv Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 (edited) Good morning, You already know how to stop drinking. " YOU" can help your self! you mentioned it already in your post. Its your life, You have control of it in your hands. Read the book " secret" that can help guide you how to creat your own universe of how to live your life again. "What you think about the most or focus on the most is what will appear as your life" everyone will move on living their life to their likeness ...You cant be mad at the world for your behaivor, because YOU are the one in control of your OWN self. My fiance is an alcholic! I tell him this everyday, we love each other but I am giving him a chance to make a better life. If he dont I would LEAVE him in the future. My universe is different from his, he has to adjust or just deal with what comes next. Remember: what your manifest is what you receive. Hope you feel better soon. Edited July 23, 2014 by EverLastluv 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 You say you've "done the AA meetings, addiction centers and one on one counselling". Does that mean you are no longer in any kind of treatment or therapy? If not, I would strongly recommend that you get back into some kind of program and STAY there even if/when you f*ck up. One thing I know for sure is that it's next to impossible to beat this addiction, or ANY addiction for that matter, without some kind of professional help. Good luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Oops...duplicate post. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheBeckoningCat Posted September 2, 2014 Share Posted September 2, 2014 Okay, here goes, I think the key is in understanding the trigger to the relapses. Your ex (esp. fighting with your ex) triggers binges. Maybe thinking about your ex, or going places you used to go together have a similar effect? (I remember how every night at 5pm the urge to drink would arrive on time... followed shortly by my now ex-husband and his urge to fight)... The reason your ex is so triggering? Could it be depression? Reminders of childhood trauma? Reminders of past fights with your ex? HALT - Hungry, angry, lonely tiredness? Once you figure out the trigger, then un/fortunately some healthy, non-alcohol/ic way of dealing with the trigger would be needed (whether that's calling a sponsor, working out, going to a meeting) I'm sure there's a lot more to it than that, and so ponder what treatment program might help you, one day at a time, (well okay, one hour at a time in my case), Cheers with tea - seriously - I'm drinking tea! Cat 2 Link to post Share on other sites
JDPT Posted October 5, 2014 Share Posted October 5, 2014 Start by addressing all underlying issues. Those are the triggers that ultimately lead you to binge drink. We all have issues. I'm impulsive and my addicting personality lead me in the past to make the worst decision. I now work on keeping those in check and making better decisions understanding that alcohol will only exacerbate my already messed up state of mind so I stay away from it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 5, 2014 Share Posted October 5, 2014 Any advice on how to stay sober??? Yeah, go to AA... introduce yourself in the meeting, say you are an Alcoholic and say you need a sponsor and ask if anybody there can sponsor you. Listen to your sponsor.. meaning you take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth, start to do your steps.. You do 90 meetings in 90 days and by the grace of god as you know him you will be on your way to living a sober life. By the way.. I quit that way and have been sober for over 27 years.. Keep on Keeping on.... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
The Like Fairy Posted October 5, 2014 Share Posted October 5, 2014 I have a friend who accumulated 6 DUI's and was sent by the judge hand cuffed to a deputy sherriff to forcefully attend the AA meetings. Long story short is it worked, he's been sober almost 15 years. You need to give it a try. A free support system of others who have been where you are. You can't beat that Link to post Share on other sites
me85 Posted October 7, 2014 Share Posted October 7, 2014 (edited) I can relate. I'm also a binge drinker. I got a DUI this year. First one. And I wasn't even drunk. /= But I definitely have a problem. I know I'm an alcoholic. Alcoholism runs in my family. I've been a regular drinker since I was 14. I'm 29. I know I need to go back to AA meetings. I only went a few times last year. I never spoke but it did help. More than that, I need counseling. I need help. I love to drink more than I love to do anything. I want to start working out at my gym after work but always go home to drink (alone) instead. It's my best friend. I mean, what kind of life would sober life be?? To never drink again?? That seems so impossible to me. If I could learn to drink in moderation that would great. But I know there's no such thing as me drinking in moderation on occasion. Yes, I'm lonely. Yes, I'm grieving the death of my Grandmother. But drinking more than a 6 pack every night?? What have I become? No one will love me this way. Edited October 7, 2014 by me85 Link to post Share on other sites
Xiane Posted October 17, 2014 Share Posted October 17, 2014 hi! how are you now? you can help yourself, i know it. when the urge buzzing you, keep thinking all those bad memories alcohol made you, keep hanging in there. i know it's hard, but just like what you said, only you can stop this madness, it's only two choices, A.) hit that bottle again and be miserable for more days, or B.) start finding something interest you that not involve a can or a bottle of beer and start kicking a better days. it is all up to you men. Link to post Share on other sites
welyam Posted November 19, 2014 Share Posted November 19, 2014 i am an alcoholic, but learning to turn my back off to this addiction. it's not easy, especially when the crave is kicking. Link to post Share on other sites
carly75 Posted November 20, 2014 Share Posted November 20, 2014 If you willing to give up alcohol you have to motivate yourself by turning down your bad habit. You are right the only thing that can help you is yourself Link to post Share on other sites
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