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Do alcoholics lie about everything?


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Old 14th January 2008, 7:23 PM   #1
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Do alcoholics lie about everything?

..or just lie about their consumption?
My boyfriend is a closet alcoholic who not only lies about that but just about everything else too, and there is no reason for it! My therapist said alcohol fries the part of your brain responsible for reasoning and judgment and she totally thinks he lies about everything because he's an alcoholic. He is so used to lying, he will just lie about the smallest thing, even what he had for dinner.

I have read a little bit about alcoholism and I'm aware of what I'm getting into, should I decide to remain in this relationship. Was just wondering about the lying. I know they lie about their drinking but just don't see why they have to lie about everything else too.
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Old 14th January 2008, 7:27 PM   #2
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I think what the therapist told you is bull. Yes, alcoholics lie about they're drinking. But not necessarily about everything else. I'll bet you anything if he stops drinking, he'll still be a liar.

Why would you want to be with someone who you can't even trust to tell you the truth about the small things...never mind the more important things?
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Old 14th January 2008, 7:57 PM   #3
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IMO, anything which could prevent them from having their next drink, they are more than likely to lie. But I would find it hard to believe they lie about absolutely everything.
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Old 15th January 2008, 7:53 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JackhammerGemma View Post
..or just lie about their consumption?
My boyfriend is a closet alcoholic who not only lies about that but just about everything else too, and there is no reason for it! My therapist said alcohol fries the part of your brain responsible for reasoning and judgment and she totally thinks he lies about everything because he's an alcoholic. He is so used to lying, he will just lie about the smallest thing, even what he had for dinner.

I have read a little bit about alcoholism and I'm aware of what I'm getting into, should I decide to remain in this relationship. Was just wondering about the lying. I know they lie about their drinking but just don't see why they have to lie about everything else too.
Have you read any books on addiction? If not i would do so. The addict will lie about everything to keep his addiction no matter what it is. It usually gets worse without an intervention. I know all about it believe me.
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Old 15th January 2008, 8:05 AM   #5
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Yes, they will lie about everything because they do not remember or if they do not tell the truth it DID NOT happen......my H is an alcoholic and he lies about the dumbest crap on the planet, what an idiot !
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Old 15th January 2008, 9:31 AM   #6
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Have you read any books on addiction? If not i would do so. The addict will lie about everything to keep his addiction no matter what it is. It usually gets worse without an intervention. I know all about it believe me.
I would agree with Cracked1 and would add that Alcoholism is a denial based disease..
so just by being an active alcoholic lends itself to being dishonest..
The Alcoholic lives in a world where they are being dishonest to themselves firstly and then to the people around them.

When we sober up we have to do a moral/personal inventory of ourselves and who we have hurt thru our drinking and that is the road or the process to clearing our denial/dishonesty from our lives.
A 12 step program that is worked is our way of doing so...
Quote:
::: The 12 Steps :::

1: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol--that our lives had become unmanageable.
2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5: Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

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Old 15th January 2008, 9:34 AM   #7
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I've heard this at AA meetings before -- when do you know an addict is lying?

When they open their mouth.
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Old 15th January 2008, 12:32 PM   #8
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My brother was/is a alcoholic and I know others that would fit the description and they will lie and break your heart every time no matter how hard you try to help.

The best thing to remember is until they admit to themselves they have a problem and seek help it would probably be more healthy just to bang your head against a wall than to ride the roller coaster.
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Old 16th January 2008, 5:24 AM   #9
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I lied a lot more when I was drinking. I didn't lie about everything, but I did a lot more general BS-ing. I always came up with "reasons" why I couldn't go out with my friends, or see my family, etc.
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Old 16th January 2008, 1:38 PM   #10
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hmm do alcoholics lie about everything? well an alcoholic who isnt in recovery would obviously be lieing to themselves about there own situation
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