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Whats it mean when someone says youre "hard to gauge"?


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Cookiesandough

What do you believe it means if you get back from a date and someone texts "you're...intriguing. Fun. Hard to gauge." ? Is that a dressed up way of saying weird?

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I wouldn't normally view "hard to gauge" as a good thing, but with the context of the other comments, I do think he's interested in getting to know you better.

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Cookiesandough

Thx guys.

 

 

Just means you're hard to figure out. Usually because you are weird. Every woman I ever dated tells me the same thing.

 

 

But everyone is hard to figure out. It's a first date!!! I mean there are all kinds of layers to people that take time to figure out. Is it similar to "hard to read" like your behavior is not consistent and you are confusing?

 

 

I wouldn't normally view "hard to gauge" as a good thing, but with the context of the other comments, I do think he's interested in getting to know you better.

 

No, doesn't sound like a good thing at all, but he did ask for a second date. But I don't like that the best compliment he could give sounded like what you'd say about a science experiment you're winging with household items.

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I would equate hard to gauge with hard to read.

 

As in its hard to get a clear picture of what that person is thinking based off of their words and body language.

 

And I disagree that everyone is hard to gauge. Sure we are all complex with many layers - but some people are more clear and direct than others.

 

I used to be involved with a guy who I would often tell "you are hard to read". I would say this because it was hard to discern what he was really thinking - others, it's clear as day across their face, through their words in their body posture - everything.

 

It was no coincidence that he was an expert poker player.

 

Meanwhile, my boss for instance, super easy to read, heck he blushes for one! That man can't hide a thought.

 

Haven't you mentioned that you tend to put on a facade and try to delay revealing your real self?

 

For me - I would find someone like that "hard to gauge" or hard to read - because their words and body language isn't flowing naturally, but rather in a calculated way (like the hard to read poker player).

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I would say it means the opposite of you wear your heart on your sleeve. They say 93% of communication is non-verbal so assuming your 7% verbal communication was all normal, being hard to read probably means you don't communicate non-verbally much. Like you don't gesticulate or move your arms, don't use strong facial expressions, your voice tone is more constant than other people, etc. I am the same, I don't communicate non-verbally very much. It's neither a compliment or an insult, just an observation.

 

He also said you're intriguing and fun so I'm not sure why you're focusing on the hard to gauge part being the best compliment he could give. He gave 2 better ones right there.

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Well, you wouldn't be much fun if l could have you all figured out in one damn date anyway but he seems to think he should have you pegged already.

It's not really a bad thing but you might find he might be pretty boring and mechanical as you get to know him , or you might not haha.

lf you like him try the second date , see how you feel after that.

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