Your Personal Love Obstacles

[Mysterio]

So what do you think your obstacle is when it comes to love or getting into a Love relationship? Even if your attached or not.

 

Is it the following. Their physical looks/ethnicity/personality/Personal Stauts= They are married/separated.

 

is it your physical looks where you think your average looking/Ethnicity/Personal status/Lifestyle+outgoing vs homebody.

 

For me its the woman's personal status that comes into play for the most part. Its like I am more surrounded by women that have romantic relationships, than a bunch of single women in my social environment. My Ethnicty is Black, but I don't even think thats the major reason for being single.

 

My personality is more like I am the guy you can talk to. I am not the guy that you are going to feel just wants to have sex with you and throw you away the morning after.

 

I am not Mr. Serious but then I am not Mr. Jokes as well. I feel more well rounded and am not extreems. I would say I am more Mr. Introspective. I am more inqusitive. We have to solve this Mystery type of guy.

 

My looks is that I am more on the Cute side of things. Boyishly handsome if I am being honest. Not a Lady killer looks like James Bond.

[Gaeta]

No obstacle at all.

 

I have never been the kind of woman to compare herself to others. I have always had a lot of confidence in who I am. I am a short brunette and I use what I have and I rock it all I can :-) I never had problems dating and never envied the prettier, taller and younger women around.

[carhill]

I don't believe them anymore. That's not an indictment, rather a function of being older and reflecting on the world in general. I'd like to, sure. But, nah. Personally, I think the seeds of that were planted decades ago by all the married women who lied to me. That's a big obstacle to love. Now I simply show human care and concern for others, treating those who don't seek to demean and threaten me like ordinary humans, and move on in life.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

For me, it's being pretty isolated. I work from home alone. The gym I go to is all women. I don't go out to bars very often because I really only have one single girlfriend who is local enough to go out with, and we both have children. I don't go to church nearly as much as I should.

 

I'm totally fine with all of this at the moment, though .

[Tribble]

Where do I begin?? There are many, the issue is trying to figure out how to get over them!

 

One of my issues is certainly approachability. I have been single for most of my life and for a lot of the time, that was okay. Because of that, I have learned to be independent and get along quite happily on my own - I don't need anyone. That tends to come across as unavailable and uninterested.

 

Added to that, I have dealt with a lot of rejection in my past and I tend to put up barriers to protect myself. I am open to a relationship but I need to feel emotionally connected to someone first. That means I need friendship and to feel like someone like me for me (rather than trying to get in my pants!) for me to even think of something romantically. Most guys aren't prepared to wait that long. It's also why internet dating has tended to fail as I never feel the initial spark.

 

Contributing to that, my social circle isn't very large so I don't get to see people through friends enough to get to know them. The problem here is that I like not having lots and lots of friends. I like to spend my time developing the few friendships I have rather than having a lot of acquaintances. I like to invest my time in something meaningful. But those friends are all in very serious relationships so it makes it difficult.

 

Something certainly needs to change. I'm miserable alone right now and crave the intimacy of having someone. :-(