False claims - to the extreme

[Gloria25]

I was just chatting with a gf about my situation and it reminded me of something horrible one of my soldiers did.

 

I had a soldier in my platoon that slept with some guy besides her bf. Her and her bf were in my platoon.

 

She alleged "rape". Literally, she accused this guy of raping her.

 

We, our command, of course could not just sit back and let this go. We had to do an investigation, etc. Her bf went to beat up the guy.

 

Well, when things got hot, guess what? She confessed that she lied about the rape.

 

Professionally, she was a good soldier. Personally, I didn't care for her (even before the rape allegations). I felt that she was too "street smart" for her sheltered bf...[]

 

So, I just wonder what goes through a person's head to make false allegations of such a grievous nature - to cover them stepping out (or thinking of stepping out) on their bf/gf/SO.

 

How can you make such an allegation and think it'll go no where, that there won't be repercussions for the person you accused?

 

Has anyone experienced being falsely accused of something so grave that it cost them something (i.e. their job, reputation, etc.).

 

Geesh, what's the matter with some people?

Edited December 30, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Language

[umirano]

Sick. I know of a teacher who lost his job because of false accusations of having touched a student inappropriately. He was acquitted, not because of a lack of proof but because what the prosecution brought forward was not even remotely illegal. He was accused by a student who's probably mentally ill and known to be a compulsive liar by the school staff.

 

Either way, he spent Christmas and nye, and a few weeks extra in jail before he was released and his job was not reinstantiated, despite him being innocent. After he sued for damage they gave him a job in the same department where he now has to work in the office next to the guy who's responsible for the FU in the first place.

 

I don't really blame the student here so much as this guy's superiors, they've failed him completely and I think someone should be in jail, not the teacher though.

[Shining One]

While not nearly as serious as a rape accusation, I did have a female coworker go to HR about me for harassing / stalking her. Admittedly, I was interested in her and we had gone out quite a few times. She was hot and cold with me. When I got tired of it, I said I was done trying with her. At that point, she switched from cold to hot again, but I rebuffed her efforts to hang out. After a couple weeks, she went to HR. Fortunately for me, all of our in-office chats are logged. I showed all of our communication to HR and that exonerated me. I don't know how things would have gone if I didn't have that evidence. I still have no idea why she did it.

[dreamingoftigers]

I had a best friend through elementary to high school.

 

In the last year of high school, we moved in together and she was dating this really handsome guy. She planned to lose her virginity to him, she did. Then then next day her and I met up at a mall to go shopping. She bought him and birthday present and asked me if I was jealous that "she lost it first."

 

I laughed at the time because my after High School goal was to become a Catholic Nun. (Not kidding, that soon changed). But the last thing I wanted to do at the time was "lose it" (until about 4-5 months later where I met a boy I really liked and six months after that I did take the plunge).

 

Shortly after his birthday he dumps her and goes back to his ex.

 

ONE YEAR LATER her parents find out she isn't a virgin anymore and she makes up this RIDICULOUS story about being BRUTALLY raped by this guy. Including her getting thrown down stairs over and over and beaten and tied up etc.

 

And she says to me I have to back her story. She gets the police involved telling me "I could have sworn I told you. Don't you remember I couldn't walk straight, I had bruises everywhere blah blah blah blah."

 

Bullcrap, she was even out in a Tank Top the next day and I had pics from it.

 

Our friendship dissolved soon after when she was caught stealing from my parents (that's a whole other story).

 

Meanwhile I had to give a statement to the police and I 110% refused to implicate this guy who was probably 110% innocent.

 

My mom even drove her and I to the Dr. after she lost her virginity so she could get birth control because she figured it would be a regular thing.

 

Then she tells my mother that I "knew about her being raped" and my mother was mad at ME for not telling her. (Until I explained what happened and reminded her about the birth control. )

 

The whole thing was PLANNED, and I know a woman can withdraw consent at any time, but from my perspective it was planned, consented to, bragged about and planned more encounters..... If she was victimized it sure wasn't being beaten and tossed downstairs over and over. Unless she did an amazingly quick recovery enough to be at home the night and hike around the mall the next day searching for a birthday present.

[Gloria25]

While not nearly as serious as a rape accusation, I did have a female coworker go to HR about me for harassing / stalking her. Admittedly, I was interested in her and we had gone out quite a few times. She was hot and cold with me. When I got tired of it, I said I was done trying with her. At that point, she switched from cold to hot again, but I rebuffed her efforts to hang out. After a couple weeks, she went to HR. Fortunately for me, all of our in-office chats are logged. I showed all of our communication to HR and that exonerated me. I don't know how things would have gone if I didn't have that evidence. I still have no idea why she did it.

 

Well, at least HR was about resolving the issue and you had evidence. Bunch of sorry, sick people out there with no spines.

[TheAntiHero]

These stories are pretty disgusting.

 

So, I can have perfectly consensual sex with a girl one week.

 

But if I decide to break it off the next and the bitch is crazy, she has the potential to ruin my life through one lie.

 

What else is new, though, right?

[thefooloftheyear]

Yeah....When I was a bouncer in clubs, women would always say we sexually assaulted them...Most were too drunk or coked up to know one way or another, but it was mostly due to them trying to squeeze money out of the club owner..

 

Luckily the owner had a sharp attorney and no case I recall ever had any legs...

 

TFY

[GunslingerRoland]

It's sad what these kind of accusations can do to a man's life. But what is really disappointing to me, is that do these girls not realize how much this BS hurts women who are really sexually assaulted?

 

I mean they are single-handedly undermining the ability to trust rape victims unless there is proof, which there usually isn't.

[mrs rubble]

It's not just women who make up lies.

My ex husband accused my older son of sexually assaulting my younger son, my mother of physically assaulting my younger son all in a bid for custody. The police found no evidence of any truth to the accusations but it was awful for all of us. My mother suffered cancer shortly after, I blame the stress.

My ex husband also went around telling people that I'd stolen chemicals from work and poisoned him by putting them in his food, which was so bizarre as he didn't really eat and we don't have any chemicals at work that you could do that with. Many people believed him until a lady I worked with Heard the stories and pointed out that there was no way I could have done that.

[thefooloftheyear]

It's not just women who make up lies.

My ex husband accused my older son of sexually assaulting my younger son, my mother of physically assaulting my younger son all in a bid for custody. The police found no evidence of any truth to the accusations but it was awful for all of us. My mother suffered cancer shortly after, I blame the stress.

My ex husband also went around telling people that I'd stolen chemicals from work and poisoned him by putting them in his food, which was so bizarre as he didn't really eat and we don't have any chemicals at work that you could do that with. Many people believed him until a lady I worked with Heard the stories and pointed out that there was no way I could have done that.

 

He probably saw the same episode of "Forensic Files" that I did...This crazy woman slowly killed two husbands by spiking their food with low level amounts of Arsenic....Then she had them cremated so that they couldn't get any evidence..Some sharp scientist was able to determine from the ashes that there was Arsenic poisoning...and she was locked up..

 

Anyway, that;s some bizarre shyt...Sorry you had to endure that..

 

TFY

[dreamingoftigers]

It's sad what these kind of accusations can do to a man's life. But what is really disappointing to me, is that do these girls not realize how much this BS hurts women who are really sexually assaulted?

 

I mean they are single-handedly undermining the ability to trust rape victims unless there is proof, which there usually isn't.

 

I was SO mad at my friend, so disgusted that she was just screwing over so many people.

 

I confronted her on it too but it just went nowhere. I mean, she stuck with her story TO MY FACE and said she had all of these bruises and I should remember and so forth. At the time it really bothered me because I thought "what if I did miss something? Then I'm not only not supportive, I'm actually tearing down a rape victim." But she really wasn't and hindsight only made it clearer and clearer. But good luck sharing that story in mixed company without hearing a bunch of "you weren't there" blah blah blah. I mean it is entirely possible that SOMETHING awful happened, but if she wouldn't have embellished everything else about the story (including telling ME) then at least I could have supported HER even if I couldn't confirm her actual assault.

 

I just couldn't be her friend anymore. And we were best friends since kindergarten. I stopped hanging out with her etc. and I LIVED with her. Then she stole from my parents so it made it easy to just break the lease we had.

[dreamingoftigers]

He probably saw the same episode of "Forensic Files" that I did...This crazy woman slowly killed two husbands by spiking their food with low level amounts of Arsenic....Then she had them cremated so that they couldn't get any evidence..Some sharp scientist was able to determine from the ashes that there was Arsenic poisoning...and she was locked up..

 

Anyway, that;s some bizarre shyt...Sorry you had to endure that..

 

TFY

 

So weird, I saw a forensic files where the husband did that to the wife but it was in such low doses that it actually gave her some immunity to it for awhile, that he accidentally gave her soup to someone else figuring it wasn't working and it either killed or nearly killed them. That's when he got caught.

 

People suck.

 

Amazing how so many people can really stab someone in the back so close to them.

[Gloria25]

It's sad what these kind of accusations can do to a man's life. But what is really disappointing to me, is that do these girls not realize how much this BS hurts women who are really sexually assaulted?

 

I mean they are single-handedly undermining the ability to trust rape victims unless there is proof, which there usually isn't.

 

Well unfortunately, there are also men who make false claims against women too.

[Quiet Storm]

Yeah....When I was a bouncer in clubs, women would always say we sexually assaulted them...Most were too drunk or coked up to know one way or another, but it was mostly due to them trying to squeeze money out of the club owner..

 

Luckily the owner had a sharp attorney and no case I recall ever had any legs...

 

TFY

 

My husband was a bouncer for extra $$ when we were young. This happened at a few clubs he worked at. He wasn't accused, but some guys he worked with were. I witnessed it one time. A girl started freaking out on her boyfriend and a girl she thought he was messing with. She was drunk/ high and swinging wildly while falling all over the place. A bouncer was attempting to drag her out and she started screaming about how he's grabbing her boobs. I've never saw a person thrash as much as her. She reminded me of trying to get a cat in a cat carrier- four attacking limbs going in all directions. If the bouncer touched her boob, it wasn't intentional.

[Popsicle]

You would think the potential of this would dissuade men from wanting casual sex with women, but .... no, not hardly.

[Shining One]

You would think the potential of this would dissuade men from wanting casual sex with women, but .... no, not hardly.

The thing is, you don't actually need to have casual sex with women to be accused of rape or other crimes.

One woman said she was raped to explain to her mother why she was looking at porn

One woman said she was raped and manufactured evidence because she was mentally ill

One woman said she was raped in order to get sympathy

One woman said she was raped in an attempt to get her boyfriend back

One woman said she was raped as an explanation to her friends for her mood

 

None of these women actually had sex with the men they accused.

[Popsicle]

The thing is, you don't actually need to have casual sex with women to be accused of rape or other crimes.

One woman said she was raped to explain to her mother why she was looking at porn

One woman said she was raped and manufactured evidence because she was mentally ill

One woman said she was raped in order to get sympathy

One woman said she was raped in an attempt to get her boyfriend back

One woman said she was raped as an explanation to her friends for her mood

 

None of these women actually had sex with the men they accused.

 

That's worse. You'd think men wouldn't even want to go near women.

[Shining One]

It's not just women who make up lies.

Well unfortunately, there are also men who make false claims against women too.

While it's true that men are no more virtuous than women in this area, it seems more common to see false reports from women than men. I believe this is because men simply report things far less often than women. Less reports mean less false reports.

[anonymousbear00101100]

My now ex and I had a bit of off and on toxic relationship for a while. Once, we broke up for about a month. I thought it was for good and had no plans of getting back together with her.

 

I met this other girl and we became friends with benefits. I was not interested in dating her as I was still heartbroken, but being dumb I thought sex was the answer.

 

I told this girl my exact feelings towards her many times. I only wanted to hookup without feelings, and if she was uncomfortable with that then we shouldn't hook up anymore. She always said she felt the same way.

 

Something about her was off. She was incredibly arrogant and a little bit mean but the sex was insane so I ignored some of the red flags.

 

One day my ex and I started talking again. We talked about all of our problems and admitted that we both missed each other and wanted tow work things out. We decided to get back together (yes, very dumb).

 

I alerted this other girl that I wouldn't be seeing her anymore and she flipped out. She threatened to beat up my girlfriend and trash her car. She posted many compromising conversations (dirty talk, personal feelings, etc.) of ours on Twitter so everyone in school could see. She threatened to kill herself and told me that I brought back her anorexia. I actually lost quite a few friends over that because of course she was able to pick and choose texts out of context to post.

 

The last terrible year of my relationship started out terribly and only got worse. I'd never been so angry and embarrassed. That was February of 2015 and it honestly makes me laugh now.

[salparadise]

It's not just women who make up lies.

My ex husband accused....

 

Yes, of course they do, but what would it accomplish for a man to cry rape against a woman? Who would believe it? On the other hand, women know that they can have a man arrested instantaneously by crying rape or sexual assault. It happens all the time. They're believe by default.

 

My exW threatened to level a false accusation against me. She was having a splitting episode. I said here, you want me to dial the number... and I actually dialed 911 and held the phone at my side while she continued. She didn't realize it but her threats were recorded before the police arrived. That might have been the slickest move I ever made because after that it would've been hard for anyone to ever believe her.

 

My brother's wife accused him of beating and raping her on the back lawn at 3 am one night while they were in the midst of divorcing. There was no evidence of anything, and when they went to his house he came to the door half asleep, and that happened 3-4 times.

 

Finally, she called and reported that he had put some kind of poison on the kid's back packs. They closed the school and called out the hazmat crew. No evidence whatsoever.

 

She honestly believed that the accusations were justified –– not that he had committed the acts per se, but she felt justified in saying whatever she could to have him arrested and to keep the kids from him. She was never charged with making false accusations. They knew she was a fruit loop, but did nothing. My brother lost his boys for good. She convinced them that he was evil and the courts refused to force visitation because the kids were genuinely afraid of him. He hasn't had contact in about 17 years now. It's called Parental Alienation Syndrome, and this may be the worst case I've ever heard of.

Edited January 2, 2017 by salparadise

[thefooloftheyear]

The physical differences in the sexes usually mean that a claim of rape from a man against a woman, really wont be taken very seriously ...I mean, lets face it, even the most fit of woman could be overpowered by a drunken homeless guy...

 

Sure, I suppose its a concern, but I never worried about it...There were times, i thought women put themselves is very precarious positions, but I suppose that's the risk they are willing to take, or they are good at reading the intentions of men,..I dunno....

 

'm kinda surprised that with all the casual going on these days, that there isn't some type of phone app, that allows a person to quickly offer documented consent by way of fingerprint recognition or some other means...Id imagine the people playing that game, would need to worry...I know I would if I did...I have a lot of assets and wouldn't want someone trying to squeeze me or make my life miserable over false bullshyt claims...

 

Bottom line is life is full of risks...You could get T-boned and killed driving to work, and that won't stop you from driving...And quite frankly, aside of the petty garbage I posted earlier in the thread, the only guy I know that really got into hot water with a false rape charge,. did something pretty shytty to the woman first...Not sure if it warranted him going through what he did, but if you live your life clean and you aren't an aszhole, then the likelihood of something like this happening is very, very rare...

 

 

TFY ...

Edited January 2, 2017 by thefooloftheyear

[Shining One]

I dunno....

 

'm kinda surprised that with all the casual going on these days, that there isn't some type of phone app, that allows a person to quickly offer documented consent by way of fingerprint recognition or some other means...

There is. It just isn't very popular.

[Got it]

Unfortunately this comes up in the workplace. We hold false accusations to the same standard as those found to have truly violated our policies and will terminate over them if proven.

[Shining One]

Unfortunately this comes up in the workplace. We hold false accusations to the same standard as those found to have truly violated our policies and will terminate over them if proven.

Very progressive. How do you handle he said / she said situations when there's little to no evidence backing up either side's story?

[Gloria25]

Very progressive. How do you handle he said / she said situations when there's little to no evidence backing up either side's story?

 

Get a load of this one:

 

Readers Respond to Column on False Accusations - ABC News

 

 

"More than 3,300 readers responded to my recent column on false accusations of sexual harassment in the workplace. Here are some of the most interesting responses.

 

One of the most provocative e-mails came from a woman who said she had falsely accused someone of sexual harassment:

 

Young and Inexperienced

 

“I once made a false claim of sexual harassment against someone. It was neither intentional nor vindictive — it was the result of too many players on the field and some serious miscommunication. I was young, inexperienced and not really good with office relations. It all started when the accused’s comments to me were overheard. My cubicle mate told my boss, my boss initiated certain procedures and another fellow in the department who very much liked me (and later became my fiancé) had words with him. So, when I finally convinced myself that there was a problem and then told the accused that he was frightening me, things had already gotten out of hand. I claimed that I thought he was sexually harassing me because. 1) I didn’t really know what sexual harassment was, and 2) my co-workers insisted it was and that things were only going to get worse if I didn’t speak up. The accused was forced to publicly apologize to the entire section. About a week later, the accused and I were able to sort things through. It seemed like a simple matter of communication (or lack of it) that had spiraled into something worse when other players got involved and because I didn’t have the experience in how to deal with office interactions early on. The whole event worries me because it happened so easily, without a lot of my encouragement. All it takes is a little misinterpretation and a lot of people, with or without good intentions. I’m sure that’s not an uncommon mix in the working world.”

 

Joann B."

 

I still can't believe how some people think they can say "x" and it not spiral out of control...