BK2016 Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Hello all. I have never been on a site like this but I would really value at least few people's opinions on something that is close to my heart. I will try and make it concise whilst giving you all the main points. So I am a one woman guy, been in only a few relationships since I was young and just come out of a long term one about 6 months ago, that relationship lasted over 10 years. For all the years since I was with my most recent partner I still had feelings for my ex girlfriend, it ended badly but my feelings remained. My ex girlfriend and I started talking when I split with my most recent partner over messaging and then met up. We had talks about the prospect of the two of us making a go of it in the future but she suggested I needed time to move on the my most recent partner. She has children and has been hurt in the past by her ex and so is pretty guarded but all the signs are there that it is is destiny we get together, despite a consensus that people say it's hard to go back in time when you have history - I feel I need to experience it to see if it's a fantasy that can be turned into a reality. Since then we have been working on our relationship as friends but I felt I was getting mixed signals, but I can sense a real feeling of connection between us. She has her children to protect and I think still feels scarred after her ex who mistreated her. As I didn't know where she stood I met someone else who wanted to date, even though I wasn't looking, and so I put it to her in a message how she feels about us (as she had no time to talk face to face that week) and I said someone else is a bit keen - I certainly wasn't playing any games and I wanted my ex to say "take me" but as I mentioned this other girl she went all cold and basically said do what you want I don't care kind of response. We have been having some space from each other and since last seeing her (which is a good few weeks now) I have written her a heart felt letter but measured letter that I am thinking of sending in a few weeks to arrive on her birthday so she knows how I feel about her, so she can consider and act on when the time is right, if not then it's out there and I have been honest. So would love to hear your thoughts on the above and understand the mind of a lady, where I stand with her and any thoughts with what could be going on inside her complex but beautiful mind? Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 I'm lost. You told her you wanted your ex to say "take me" at the same time you said you met a new woman to date? What does "take me" mean about your ex? This one wanted you over your ex and if I'm interpreting right, you are not. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 It sounds like she doesn't want to get back with you. I can't say I blame her as I think I would feel the same. I wouldn't end that letter if I were you and especially not for her birthday. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BK2016 Posted February 12, 2016 Author Share Posted February 12, 2016 Thanks for your feedback. To be honest a couple of things have happened since writing this last night, believe it or not, and in addition to the above replies I think it's best to pull back. My actions around entertaining the prospect of someone else (this other woman) was my guard as I have my own insecurities over my ex as when I said the relationship needed badly all those years ago it was no direct fault of my own (if you can read between the lines). Anyway it helped me to air it publicly, even though I havent waited for lots of responses, sometimes the advice you can get from friends is to just go for it but the public can be more neutral or critical which is what I was looking for. Thanks again... Link to post Share on other sites
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