LatinGurl84 Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 There's this man I see on my train commute to work every day. Not sure why, but every time I turn around he is right behind me. He has also appeared at the winery I go to after work 2 times already and gets off his car just when I get out of mine. The last time I saw him at the winery, he followed me in his car as I was driving home. Not sure what is going on here, but I am starting to get creeped out! Why would a man start following you around like this and why do I feel like every time I turn, he's there? Maybe I am overthinking things? Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 You need to figure out if he's actually following you or if it's coincidental. Has he ever approached you or spoken to you? Does he seem to be trying to hide or otherwise acting suspiciously? Does he make eye contact or expressly try to avoid it? If you're sure he's following you then you should contact law enforcement. In the meantime be careful always be in public places, not to be where you might be vulnerable. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted February 11, 2016 Author Share Posted February 11, 2016 You need to figure out if he's actually following you or if it's coincidental. Has he ever approached you or spoken to you? Does he seem to be trying to hide or otherwise acting suspiciously? Does he make eye contact or expressly try to avoid it? If you're sure he's following you then you should contact law enforcement. In the meantime be careful always be in public places, not to be where you might be vulnerable. Yea, he acts strange. He avoids eye contact and always tends to walk slowly behind me whenever I'm getting off the train at night and walking to my car. He also parks very far away from my car but somehow gets to his car fast enough and catches up with mine and ends up where I am (winery). I just think it's strange how this has happened twice already and at times it looks like he is trying to hide but most of the time it's more like he wants his presence to be known! Hmm... Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Maybe he's a private eye that someone hired to follow you. If not, be careful and try not to be alone because there are alot of bad people out there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Has he followed you all the way home? In other words, does he know where you live? Next time he's following your vehicle, call the cops. Do you have his license plate number? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted February 11, 2016 Author Share Posted February 11, 2016 Has he followed you all the way home? In other words, does he know where you live? Next time he's following your vehicle, call the cops. Do you have his license plate number? No, don't know his license plate number He followed me from the station, to the winery, then drove behind me up until I was making my very last turn onto the road where my house is located--then he split off from there... Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 It could be nothing, but I'd still take precautions. Pepper spray and a whistle or alarm probably isn't a bad idea, regardless. If he's following you in the car don't turn onto your street while he's still following- you don't want him knowing where you live. Get his license plate number if you can. Next time he gets off the train at the same stop let him go first- step into a store so that he's no longer behind you. Then notice whether he also delays to get behind you again. Chances are that if he was following you intentionally he would be more covert about it, or would've tried to approach. But if you feel like something's not right then get some info (plate no.) and contact law enforcement. Perhaps have an officer meet you as you get off the train and point him out. My guess is that he just rides the same train and it's nothing to worry about, but I wouldn't say you should take anything for granted if you have a bad feeling about it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
SwordofFlame Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 (edited) Easy way to tell is to take a very weird route when you're driving and if he still follows you...well now you know almost definitively. Edited February 11, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator troll call out ~T 6 Link to post Share on other sites
O'Malley Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Just from my own experience, I'd vary your routine and the timing if at all possible. Don't have any qualms about contacting police if, as has been brought up, you see him delaying/waiting around in your vicinity after you've exited the train. If you see him following you on your drive home, drive to your nearest police station and report the situation (stick to more traveled routes on the way). 2 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 Be very careful when you are going to and from your car. Be careful when passing a van or any other vehicle it would be easy to surprise someone from and drag them in. I am not trying to scare you, but just be alert as to what is around you. Personally, I would not let him get behind me while walking. You cannot see what he is doing. If you think he is behind you, swivel round and return to the station so that he has to go on alone or break his cover. If you try evasion tactics, like taking an unusual route home, and he is still behind you, then I would call the police. Stay aware and maybe carry a personal alarm. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 Yea, he acts strange. He avoids eye contact and always tends to walk slowly behind me whenever I'm getting off the train at night and walking to my car. He also parks very far away from my car but somehow gets to his car fast enough and catches up with mine and ends up where I am (winery). I just think it's strange how this has happened twice already and at times it looks like he is trying to hide but most of the time it's more like he wants his presence to be known! Hmm... Get a picture of him, get his plate number, car make etc, and go to your local police station, file a report about this! How creepy! Stay safe. Install a video cam in your car! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 My sister had a creep like that a few years ago. One of my friends who is also a police officer suggested she drive to the police station parking lot next time she noticed him following her. Not only would the police be right there so he wouldn't try anything funny, but there are usually cameras covering the lot and surrounding area to aid in identifying the person and further prove what they had been doing if need be. TOJAZ 5 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 (edited) I know a whole lot about stalkers, and I don't really care what his intent in his head is, he is a stalker. Stalkers have a very high potential to become violent. He may be casing you to find an opportunity to rape or kidnap you. You MUST try to get something on him, his tag number or a very good description, or maybe sneak around and find out where he lives -- and report it to the police. You do not mess around with stalkers. Did you know that nearly every female who ends up murdered was stalked first? Also, if you're walking or driving or whatever and you see a police while he's following you, stop the officer and quickly point to him and say "He's been following me." Or call 911 as you walk or drive and have them come get behind you. Edited February 12, 2016 by preraph 2 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 As well as changing the route you drive I would also advise just stopping within the station terminal in an area which is populated. Sit and hang out there for a bit and see if he does the same. If he does stop then speak to security or a station employee and tell them your suspicions so that you have some back up and then call the cops while you are there. This isn't something you should ignore. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted February 12, 2016 Author Share Posted February 12, 2016 Get a picture of him, get his plate number, car make etc, and go to your local police station, file a report about this! How creepy! Stay safe. Install a video cam in your car! Thank you Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted February 12, 2016 Author Share Posted February 12, 2016 I know a whole lot about stalkers, and I don't really care what his intent in his head is, he is a stalker. Stalkers have a very high potential to become violent. He may be casing you to find an opportunity to rape or kidnap you. You MUST try to get something on him, his tag number or a very good description, or maybe sneak around and find out where he lives -- and report it to the police. You do not mess around with stalkers. Did you know that nearly every female who ends up murdered was stalked first? Also, if you're walking or driving or whatever and you see a police while he's following you, stop the officer and quickly point to him and say "He's been following me." Or call 911 as you walk or drive and have them come get behind you. Hmm..so he strikes you as a stalker? Oh my! I am actually trying to familiarize myself a little more with the characteristics of stalkers just to be more aware of what to look out for... Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 Yes, if he's following you, he is stalking you. It's that simple. He's watching you and doing it even though it's making you uncomfortable, so he does not care if it makes you scared or nervous at all. It can't be out of love if he doesn't give a crap that it's scaring you -- and common sense would tell him that. If it wasn't scaring you, you'd have turned around and talked to him by now. He knows you're a good victim because you've kept quiet, haven't confronted him and let him continue to do it. So when he pulls you over and rapes you, he will be fairly certain you will be easy to control. Call the police and stop trying to justify it! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Tread Carefully Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 I would also just like to add that you really should tell someone, friends/family, what's going on as well as a description of the man. The more people that know, the better. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted February 13, 2016 Author Share Posted February 13, 2016 I would also just like to add that you really should tell someone, friends/family, what's going on as well as a description of the man. The more people that know, the better. Thanks! I will do that I have already told my mom, brother and sister. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted March 14, 2016 Author Share Posted March 14, 2016 (edited) UPDATE: Hi all! So I'm not sure at this point if I should ignore as I think I might have made it obvious that I've noticed what he's been doing OR if I'm just being too paranoid! However, just thought I'd share what has happened since the last time I posted... So, the walking right behind me thing has subsided a bit but he still does it sometimes. I have now realized that he probably knows where I live by now as he has followed me once already and I recently saw a car that looks just like his driving by my house (was too focused on the car that I couldn't see the face!). Also, I keep running into him in the mornings when I'm driving to the train station on my way to work. A few days ago, I noticed his car (coincidentally) a few cars behind me and I don't know why but I felt like I needed to get away. I didn't want him to end up behind me again so I sped off! That same night, we ended up in the same winery I always go to after work (again) and he left the store before I did. What I find disturbing is the fact that when I left the winery (after spending a little while inside) I found him sitting in his car and he had been waiting for me to come out!! He sat there and watched me as I walked by and I did a double take as this caught me by surprise. Before I could get to my car, he then sped away as though he was angry or something! Then yesterday, I saw him at the mall walking in the parking lot towards his car. Seems like another random encounter? I don't know what to think and I'm not sure if he has reacted to what I did that morning (speeding away from him) or if there is something else bothering him. It's all quite disturbing as I don't know him at all! Any thoughts guys? Edited March 14, 2016 by LatinGurl84 Link to post Share on other sites
Tread Carefully Posted March 14, 2016 Share Posted March 14, 2016 I hope you are telling your family etc about this. I would write down a detailed description of his car and him, the dates and details of all of these sightings. If you see his car again, get the license plate number! Flip out your cell phone and snap some pics. You need to protect yourself by being armed with information. Get it all together and then go talk to an Officer. Ask them what the stalking laws are in your area. You need to get proactive about this. And perhaps buy some pepper spray too. Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted March 14, 2016 Share Posted March 14, 2016 You're not giving us empirical information from which to make deductions. It has been a month and you don't seem to have anything additional to share, other than that you still see him from time to time. You also haven't given any sort of description- well dressed like a businessman, or grungy like a derelict? Does he drive a new Mercedes or a '77 Gremlin with rust and dented fenders? The lack of detail is perplexing to me. My guess is that if he were secretly stalking you he'd be doing a better job of it, and if he had some kind of romantic fixation that he probably would have approached or at least be trying to get in closer in proximity... and he'd probably be trying to make eye contact, giving you a nod and a wink, etc. Based on these factors and nothing else other than a feeling, I'm thinking you may be paranoid. Have you taken any of the precautions that were suggested a month ago? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted March 14, 2016 Author Share Posted March 14, 2016 I hope you are telling your family etc about this. I would write down a detailed description of his car and him, the dates and details of all of these sightings. If you see his car again, get the license plate number! Flip out your cell phone and snap some pics. You need to protect yourself by being armed with information. Get it all together and then go talk to an Officer. Ask them what the stalking laws are in your area. You need to get proactive about this. And perhaps buy some pepper spray too. Thanks!! I guess what scared me somewhat is the whole waiting in the car til I came out the winery thing. He should have been gone by the time I came out! And then to drive off in that manner? Not sure if this is typical behavior of a stalker being caught or if he really does have a problem with me. I really think that he noticed I was speeding off to get away from him and that might have set him off. Either way, why would a stranger's behavior bother him that much? Anyway, thanks again! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LatinGurl84 Posted March 14, 2016 Author Share Posted March 14, 2016 You're not giving us empirical information from which to make deductions. It has been a month and you don't seem to have anything additional to share, other than that you still see him from time to time. You also haven't given any sort of description- well dressed like a businessman, or grungy like a derelict? Does he drive a new Mercedes or a '77 Gremlin with rust and dented fenders? The lack of detail is perplexing to me. My guess is that if he were secretly stalking you he'd be doing a better job of it, and if he had some kind of romantic fixation that he probably would have approached or at least be trying to get in closer in proximity... and he'd probably be trying to make eye contact, giving you a nod and a wink, etc. Based on these factors and nothing else other than a feeling, I'm thinking you may be paranoid. Have you taken any of the precautions that were suggested a month ago? No, I don't see him from time to time. I see him all the time. And when he is not walking behind me, he is following me in his car or showing up at the winery I always go to after work, whenever I'm there. I would like to think this is all coincidence but something just doesn't seem right about him. He is also a working man...dresses nice and would seem normal otherwise. He is just very, very strange in his behavior and very reserved, doesn't speak to anyone. And the fact that every time he sees my car and tries to get behind me is a bit weird to me. Also, the fact that he literally sat there in his car and waited until I came out the last time I saw him at the winery and drove away in what seemed in an angry manner is disturbing to me. Can't help but wonder what I did to this stranger that he is reacting in such an odd way. Link to post Share on other sites
Tread Carefully Posted March 14, 2016 Share Posted March 14, 2016 Based on these factors and nothing else other than a feeling, I'm thinking you may be paranoid. Paranoia/ hyper vigilance can save your life. Ask any cop or security personnel. As a citizen, it's better to overreact and live than to not react and reap the possible consequences. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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