Hollywood-Tourist Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Short answer yes. Long answer... a kiss is a little less black and white than sex for cheating. If a guy kissed her and she kissed him back for a second before realizing what was happening is that cheating... maybe not. If it was a playful peck even on the lips is it cheating.. again maybe not. If she's making out with some guy is that cheating... of course. A kiss can happen so fast, the context becomes important. If she's flirting with a guy for an hour and they kiss, then it's bigger than just the kiss. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
josh451 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks if i slapped you with my left hand even though i'm right handed, don't you still get slapped? that's a stupid question. when you're dating someone you're not even supposed to be hanging out or being friendly with any member of the opposite sex. it should be common sense at this point... 6 Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Yes I would consider my partner to have cheated if he kissed another girl or let another girl kiss him, drunk or not. Anything sexual with another person is physically cheating in my book. Link to post Share on other sites
mr_dave Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Yes it is. For me it turned out to be the thin end of a very fat wedge. A few times my ex rang me up from nights out, saying she was drunk and some guy had kissed her. I forgave those happening, but eventually she ended up having sex with someone else. I think that if you let yourself succumb to a kiss, it's not much more of a stretch to go all the way. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 If you are in a committed relationship with someone, you don't kiss another person. You don't share secrets, develop an emotional bond, hide them from your SO, etc. Yes, kissing a man while committed to someone else is cheating. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PaperCrane Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 (edited) It's cheating. Kissing is foreplay, foreplay is part of sex. Would you kiss someone else in front of your SO? No? Then it's cheating. If she's allowing herself to get inebriated to the point of kissing another guy, it's time to cut her loose. If you don't, we'll be here 6 months from now helping you through a real deep (eh...haha) cheating story and I don't want that to happen to you. Yes I would consider my partner to have cheated if he kissed another girl or let another girl kiss him, drunk or not. Anything sexual with another person is physically cheating in my book. I agree. The only, and only way it isn't cheating is if someone just pushes themselves onto your partner and plants one on them. That is something they can't really control until it happens where they should push the other person off. There are so many incidentals into each scenario that would tip the scales but the baseboard version is; if someone forces an unwanted kiss on someone, the recipient isn't liable. That's the only way I see it as not cheating. Edited October 5, 2015 by PaperCrane 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks Was this a chaste peck on the cheek or was she searching for his tonsils with her tongue? For some people it is cheating. For others, it's not. It depends upon who you are asking. I consider it to be cheating. It's also inappropriate, for certain, when someone who is engaged (I take it by your screen name that this is a fiancee we're talking about, not just some chick you're dating) takes such a leave of their senses--and being drunk is no excuse. Why is she drunk and kissing other guys? Were you there? Who is this guy? I know one thing: she'd have to stop drinking if she was going to be with me. I have no patience for a lush. She has demonstrated that she has no self-discipline and can't be trusted out of your eye sight when liquor is in play. It's only a matter of time before she turns it around on you and makes it your fault that she did that. Link to post Share on other sites
maysj18 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 YES. Definitely. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks Yes. Cheating isn't just about penis in vagina or sexual acts. It's betrayal. If your relationship is predicated on monogamy, then of course kissing someone else is breaking those vows and affects the trust in the relationship. I don't see why people worry about any kind of "technical definition" of cheating, when the point is: if their behavior is uncomfortable, feels rude, disrespectful, involves acts you've never agreed were fine (like kissing others) and they're engaged in them, then that's what matters. Even if someone were to say kissing isn't cheating...is it acceptable for you/in your relationship to kiss others? If it is, then all is well. If it isn't, you have a problem. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 It depends on the kiss. I chastely kiss lots of people hello & goodbye. So does DH. We certainly don't consider closed mouth pecks a violation of our marital vows. A full on French kiss would be another story. As someone else already said though, it's your relationship. You & the person you are with have to define the boundaries where you want them set. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. And a range you'll get If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? My simple rule is, if it's considered inappropriate to the relationship when said or done in front of one's partner, and one does it and deceives their partner as to the act, then it's cheating. Hence, if my wife kisses another man in front of me while plowed, or even sober, and I consider that inappropriate, then if she did so out of my presence and deceived me in any manner and I had verifiable evidence of the act, then it would be cheating. Heh, maybe the rule isn't so simple If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Depends on the people. Over the decades, plenty of MW's have preferred a kiss on the lips with a little tongue to be, well, 'friendly' so, to them, OK. I didn't poll their husbands. Having been around a few who trended to swinging and poly, I'd opine no cheating in those cases, or even inappropriate. Others, probably. Many thanks No problem. Couples communicate, set their boundaries, and enforce them. Each couple is different. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
joseb Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks Not everyone has the same rules - I know of a woman who "knows where to draw the line" on not cheating - she stops at BJs! But yes I would consider it cheating if it's a proper kiss. How do you know she kissed a guy? Did you see it/someone else saw/she told you? Often times a cheater minimises something (like sleeping with someone) by saying that something happened (like a kiss). Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 Any kind of intimacy physical or emotionally is cheating. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Vintage79 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 if i slapped you with my left hand even though i'm right handed, don't you still get slapped? that's a stupid question. when you're dating someone you're not even supposed to be hanging out or being friendly with any member of the opposite sex. it should be common sense at this point... Wow - holy freak...you're not allowed to hang out with opposite gender people if you're in a relationship? Seriously? That get a WTF from me and I wouldn't think twice about not seeing the person again if they had that perspective...do you live in a cave? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Wow - holy freak...you're not allowed to hang out with opposite gender people if you're in a relationship? Seriously? That get a WTF from me and I wouldn't think twice about not seeing the person again if they had that perspective...do you live in a cave? People do not need opposite sex friends when in a relationship. Keeping boundaries is the first step to preventing affairs. And, yes OP that is cheating and being drunk is no excuse. Link to post Share on other sites
cessna Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Yes, it's cheating. But everything is about context. I'm assuming you mean a kiss on the lips here. Clearly a kiss on the cheek is how people of the opposite sex greet one another. Some cultures two men would even greet this way if they know each other well enough. I think that anything you wouldn't want your other half knowing can be considered cheating. Flirting and swapping numbers even if there was no physical contact would be a big no no for me and she would be out the door pretty quick. I always think that someone who would kiss someone who wasn't their other half would also go further than just a kiss. I definitely believe that once a cheater always a cheater. I wouldn't touch a girl that I knew had cheated in the past because I would never trust them. Drinking is no excuse either. I drink a fair amount and often and have done for a long time now yet I've never cheated on any girl I've been with. I'm still fully in control of my body and my actions even when I'm pissed out of my head. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 People do not need opposite sex friends when in a relationship. Keeping boundaries is the first step to preventing affairs. And, yes OP that is cheating and being drunk is no excuse. I disagree...opposite sex people can be friends...just friends. You seem a tad jealous. As for the OP given the situation here where she was a bit drunk I can forgive her more than if she was sober. Link to post Share on other sites
PaperCrane Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Sure...it's possible to have just platonic opposite sex friends. However, the cheating sections and OM OW portions of the site among countless other threads often cite the partners "friend" as the party that was involved with the cheating. Take a gander at some online articles if you must, but often times, it isn't "just friends". Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 (edited) This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks One of our Presidents of the United States said "I did not have sexual relations with that woman!" It appears that there are many lines that people draw for themselves relative to physical intimacy and it's meaning. So, bottomline, what is YOUR line? If that crossed YOUR line, there's no debate. your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, -- Would you be ok with it if she weren't drunk? Like being drunk is an excuse for anything? I was drunk and I . . . so, overlook my poor judgement every time I get drunk . . . Edited October 6, 2015 by Redhead14 Link to post Share on other sites
josh451 Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 I disagree...opposite sex people can be friends...just friends. You seem a tad jealous. As for the OP given the situation here where she was a bit drunk I can forgive her more than if she was sober. people who cheat normally do it with "friends". what do you need a friend from the opposite sex for? why does a girl need a "guy friend" when she has a boy friend? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Yes kissing is cheating if you are in a relationship. Even having an affair of the heart, where you're sending sweet missives via text to someone else is considered cheating. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks It's cheating. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kgcolonel Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 For me: Would you do "whatever" in front of your SO? If you would then possibly its not cheating, if you wouldn't, then for sure, its cheating. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
htmshsj Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 This has probably been asked before but I wanted to get a range of opinions from fellow members here. If you are in a relationship and your partner (woman) kisses another guy whilst drunk, is that considered cheating? If it is strictly a kiss is it considered cheating? Many thanks Yes. No wonder you're depressed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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