TheGagagirl1234 Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 I have had crushes in the past, but for a few months ago I fell in love with the cutest guy on Earth. We never really talked, but I thought it was because he was shy. In fact, he wasn't interested at all and now he has a girlfriend. That is so hard to accept. Sometimes I think I have accepted it, but sometimes I just can't. It is really hard to cope the 'mixed' feelings, and it feels terrible. I don't ask myself: "Why can't we just be together? And why her and not me?" but "Why can't I just accept it and be happy again?" Is this even normal? And how do I stop thinking that, because I know it won't happen to me. Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 You don't have any choice but to accept it. It may take awhile for your emotions to equilibrate with your thinking mind... in the meantime, it seems as though you're consumed with obsessive thoughts and feelings. Thoughts cause feelings, and thoughts can be controlled. So try to keep your thoughts in the logical-rational realm rather than continuing to fantasize about the guy. Easier said than done, I realize, but you have to wean yourself off of the story that's keeping you stuck. Replace it with a new story, preferably one you have some ability to effectuate the outcome of. Link to post Share on other sites
StalwartMind Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 Choose your own adventure/response/advice: Humorous: (naturally debatable) I fell in love with the cutest guy on Earth. Excuse me, but that's simply just not possible. As far as I'm aware that title is mine. Sensible: I'm going to assume you are fairly young, but you are putting all your eggs in the basket of this one guy, who you didn't even speak to. As cute and attractive as he may be, there will be others, likely many that will even surpass him. It's more than normal to be infatuated with someone or something for whatever reason, that one even at times can't explain. In general having thoughts where you wonder, what would of happened if I did X or Y, or Why her and not me? This state of mind never leads to anything good, it's an endless spiral of self destruction. While it may be difficult to believe and understand at moment, given how much space this guy occupy in your mind, this is actually a good experience for you, because this will eventually lead you to a guy who will be interested in you and sweep you off your feet. Perhaps you'll even think back on this very moment and ponder about how peculiar life can be at times. Simply put, you just don't know when someone will enter your life and change it forever, it would be sheer ignorance to believe otherwise. Let this guy have a place in your memory, but like salparadise said, accept the situation and then start opening your eyes again for the many other fine men that are on this planet. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TheGagagirl1234 Posted January 31, 2015 Author Share Posted January 31, 2015 StalwartMind: Thank you for replying! I guess I just need some time.. Today I realized that a heartbreak isn't a bad thing, I've learned so many new things about myself and my needs as well. So now I will move on and have fun with the lessons I've learned from my very first heartbreak! Link to post Share on other sites
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