bskblstar20 Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 I AM NEW TO THIS SITE AND I WANTED TO GET SOME POINT OF VIEWS FROM THE OTHER MEMEBERS I RECENTLY GOT INTO A RELATIONSHIP ABOUT A MONTH AND A HALF AGO AND MY BOYFRIEND AND I NEVER SEE OR TALK TO EACH OTHER ANYMORE. HE PLAYS TENNIS AND WORKS ON TEH WEKENDS SO HE HARDLY EVER HAS TIME TO SEE ME OR CALL ME ANYMORE. I WAS WONDERING DOES HE STILL LIKE ME OR IS HE NOT INTERESTED ANYMORE? I DO NOT WANT TO CHEAT ON HIM BECASUE THAT IS BAD BUT I AM VERY LONELY AND I CANNOT CALL HIM AND TALK TO HIM WHEN I WANT TO BECAUSE HE IS ALWAYS BUSY WITH SOMETHING. hE DOESNT HAVE TIME FOR ME ANYMORE AND IM WORRIED THAT HIS INTEREST LIES SOMEWHERE ELSE. WHAT SHOULD I THINK OR DO? Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 Someone special in my life has been quite busy the past month. She makes time to phone me, but I haven't seen her in just about a month. I questioned her about it, and she's just been busy. She has a child, work, and a few other things came up recently. Tentative plans are for this Saturday. I plan to talk to her, face to face, about why I am getting a little down over not seeing her as much as I would like to. I recommend that you do the same. That is to say, the next time you get to sit down with your guy, explain to him why you are a little troubled over him being so busy. I know that feelings of insecurity can creep up, as you might be wondering, "Is he/she still interested?" I think the best thing to do is just discuss it and explain why you feel that way. You might get a story of his daily routine and how he has been quite busy, but hopefully he will understand and make more of an effort to see you a bit more often. Once you are satisfied with what is going on, then take your next steps and do what is right for you. I'm not entirely in the same boat, but my kayak is similar enough. Maybe what I am planning to do will give you some insight into handling your dilemma. Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 ARE YOU SURE YOU ARE BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND? IT'S ONLY BEEN A MONTH AND A HALF. DID YOU HAVE "THE TALK?" IF HE RARELY SEES YOU OR CALLS YOU, THEN WHY IS HE YOUR BOYFRIEND? ARE YOU SURE YOU AREN'T READING MORE INTO THE "RELATIONSHIP" THAN IS REALLY THERE? Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 How come you're yelling, Clia? Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 Because she was yelling at us. Duh! Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 Oh bother. My scrolling finger's tired Link to post Share on other sites
Thinkalot Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 Maybe people don't realise caps means yelling. I did not know that 'till I started using this site. As to the question at hand...you need to communicate with your guy, and find out where things are at between you. Link to post Share on other sites
ziggue Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 I agree communicate. Message him (on mobile) or ring him. Sort things out with him as soon as you get a hold of him and tell you what you are thinking. That would start to make me wonder too. . My boyfriend and I are too busy to see eachother during the week because we both work. We try make time during the week to see eachother and sometimes it works out. Communication. Luckily we both have the weekends free for friends and eachother. . Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 If you just got into this relationship a month and a half ago and already he has no time for you, when did this distancing start exactly? I think Clia has made a good point. Are you sure that he considers this a "relationship"? Maybe it is just that he has a very busy life, but I would think that if he were genuinely interested in fostering a relationship with you he would make the time. He could at least ask you to play tennis with him or offer to teach you if you don't play. I would walk away from this one. If he doesn't have time for you now I can't see that he ever will. Link to post Share on other sites
ziggue Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 I agree with bluechocolate about the Tennis thing and everything else that was said. Even if my boyfriend is busy doing something on the weekend he will invite me along and ask if I am interested in going. Still keep seeing this guy if you want but don't get too attached to him so quickly. Easier said then done but! If you talk to him and things are still the same. Start looking else where. Link to post Share on other sites
JamVan Posted May 17, 2004 Share Posted May 17, 2004 I am going through much of the same with my girlfriend. We recently moved in 2 weeks ago and since that day she has always something to do. I explained to her I felt she had no time for me and I was feeling sort of neglected. She told me everything is fine and that summer is a busy time and things between us our fine. She also, said she loves me but can't spend every waking second together. But I can't help but feel things are being taken for granted now that we live together. Am I being oversensitive? Should I expect the time of adating to new surroundings? It's hard when you care for someone so deeply but time doesn't permit you to see each other as much, although time makes the heart grow fonder...is there such a thing as too much time, where your feelings begin to change/ Link to post Share on other sites
Author bskblstar20 Posted May 18, 2004 Author Share Posted May 18, 2004 Well thank everyone for replying to my situation. Yes we are a couple and he is the one that wanted to go out with so bad. I wouldn't be stressihng like this if we were not together. Well i would go along with him on his tennis trips but he plays in the tournaments and ref's as well so that would be a waste of me going. We used to see each other every weekend and sometimes during the week when he felt he had to see me. I just dont know what the problem is. Ill give him a call to see where we stand and if it doesnt work out then it doesnt work out. He says his onterest doesn't lie anywhere esle and that he loves me but when i call him he his doing homework and cannot talk on the phone while he is doing so. He barely calls me during the day because of tennis practice so i dont call him either. Im just going to wait out the situation and see where it goes. Link to post Share on other sites
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