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Ways in Which Fathers Can Connect With Teenage Sons


Parenting Discuss tips, concerns, and all the mayhem involved in raising kids.

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Old 13th November 2017, 8:28 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by CautiouslyOptimistic View Post
Now that I'm reading and responding to this thread I realize that what the relationship my ex and my son have together is way more than what some desire to have. I feel bad even starting this thread now. I'm sorry.
I think this thread can help other parents who may be at a loss for ideas. It's good you started it but I'm glad you can count your blessings!
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Old 13th November 2017, 8:30 PM   #17
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I think what you may want to consider, given that you are the mother and sounds like you are at present closer to your son than your ex-husband is, is try to talk to your son casually, no preassure, and get subtly get some ideas of what else your son might be interested in in addition to video games. forget about your hopes and aspirations in sports or your ex-husbands great athletics background when he was young. you need to accept your son as the individual that he is and is becoming. video games are a modern reality for kids and you can't escape it -- but i can guarantee you, there are things rolling around in his brain that he is interested in. they may not necessarily be things you expect. it could a sports you arent aware of. it could be history or WWII. it could robotics, it could be graphic arts, it could be comics.. who knows.

Once you have gotten a few things down on a list, then bring them forward to your ex-husband as a possible list of things they can do and see which ones he might be interested in doing with your son occasionally. It's going to be a lot easier for your ex-husband to try to adjust his own terms of when we wants to do than it is for sons, a 15 year old, to adjust to his.

explore the possible interests. if its in comics. if so ,there are things like comiccon which would be a great thing a father and son can do together. if its history, there are museum trips or military museums. it could be a type of music. who knows. its just stuff they can do together and try to start spending a bit of time together and getting to know each other and start to become more conformable with being around each other and understand the type of people and personalities they are.

btw.. its very normal for a daughter to bond better with the father. there is no male competition going on there. i have a much easier time hanging out with my daughter then my son. he drives me nuts because i constantly see myself in him and he is just like i was at his age and it drives me nuts that i can't break the cycle and turn him into something different than what i was at his age. ;-)
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Old 13th November 2017, 9:18 PM   #18
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My son has a lousy relationship with his father, but has forged a great bond with his paternal Grandfather. They play darts at the RSA once a week together for a team.
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Old 14th November 2017, 9:02 PM   #19
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My son has a lousy relationship with his father, but has forged a great bond with his paternal Grandfather. They play darts at the RSA once a week together for a team.
Yeah.Thats quite common as well. For obvious reasons, grad parents smother you and they don't judge. There was this book I read by a couple of sociologists what claimed there was this four part cycle in generations that keeps repeating itself.

great grand parents <-- grand parents <- parents <- current generation

They basically claimed, people rebel against their parents, are much closer to their grandparents, but are really very much like their great grand parents.
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Old 14th November 2017, 11:21 PM   #20
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My boyfriend plays a lot of board games with his son. Neither man, is particularly interested in sports (with the exception of football). His son loves video games so my boyfriend spends a fair bit of time watching the son play video games. But, they do play a lot of board games together...

In fact, this was also my "in" when we started dating... they needed a third player...
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