mizundastud Posted March 2, 2010 Share Posted March 2, 2010 My ex doesnt take care of our daughter and barely spends time with her. I plan on moving out of state and starting a new life and i was planning on filing for child support. The thing is Im afraid to because I know he is going to try to make it hard on me by asking for joint custody. If I move its going to be to much for me to travel back and forth for a hearing and all that stuff. If anybody has been through this or know how this stuff works please give me some advice. Also I already got everything set up in the new state and Im planning on leaving very shortly god-willing so staying here and filing is not an option. Link to post Share on other sites
fooled once Posted March 5, 2010 Share Posted March 5, 2010 My ex doesnt take care of our daughter and barely spends time with her. I plan on moving out of state and starting a new life and i was planning on filing for child support. The thing is Im afraid to because I know he is going to try to make it hard on me by asking for joint custody. If I move its going to be to much for me to travel back and forth for a hearing and all that stuff. If anybody has been through this or know how this stuff works please give me some advice. Also I already got everything set up in the new state and Im planning on leaving very shortly god-willing so staying here and filing is not an option. Where do I start.... When you say doesn't take good care of the daughter you share, what do you mean? Examples please... If you move, you will more than likely bear the cost of him having visitation. Meaning, you will be responsible for plane tickets, bringing the child to him, etc. You are NOT being smart to just up and move -- a judge could rule that you will have to come back. Child support is what is determined by a court/judge for what the non custodial parent reimburses to the custodial parent. The NC parent is legally bound to pay it. But you could definitely be in a world of hurt to up and move away, thereby effectively cutting his visitation rights. How are you going to feel if he files and judge orders you to bring the child back e/o/w so the father could have visitation? Most states today automatically give joint custody UNLESS you can provide a damn good reason for sole custody....but up and moving won't be seen in a good light. Link to post Share on other sites
bubbles5 Posted March 22, 2010 Share Posted March 22, 2010 I have no idea abt procedure n stuff but if u really care for ur daughter then take risk n work on it or else u will lose her n forever u may regret that u didnt do anything for her. And also ask ur daughter whom she would love to b staying with or else u will lose whole point. hope things go well 4 u good luck. If nothing works out then ask for nanny who can look after ur daughter when she is with ur x husband so that u will get all updates abt her. Link to post Share on other sites
sally4sara Posted March 22, 2010 Share Posted March 22, 2010 Keep him happy about the move for 6 months and you can then file for custody with the new state being considered as the child's home state. Link to post Share on other sites
Whyme_wtf Posted March 23, 2010 Share Posted March 23, 2010 Whatever you do, make certain that you start by getting the court stuff taken care of. You can't simply leave. Would you want your child to resent you for taking such action, versus standing up and speaking the truth strongly in a court. Most states are moving towards dual parenting and custody, but it still varies state to state and many courts still side by the mother. Do yourself and your child a favor and get prpoer representation to get it handled properly. Do what is respectful of yourself and your child by getting support orders and visitation established. If he then doesn't abide by the order, you will have a case to seek sole custody. Start off on solid ground first. Link to post Share on other sites
ADF Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 You should have been receiving child support all this time. I work in family law, and I am stunned--STUNNED--at the number of women who are entitled to recieve child support but fail to file papers for fear of angering the father. Let me tell you something. It isn't you who says he owes child support, it is the state that says he owes child support. Don't risk having your child go without just to appease his or her father. I suggest you contact your local legal aide agency. They maybe able to refer you to an attorney who can give you additional advice. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted March 27, 2010 Share Posted March 27, 2010 File for child support already. It takes the state so freaking long to actually collect that you'll be long gone before you ever see a check... Link to post Share on other sites
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