delnoire Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 My ex and I have been seperated for about five years now, and when we were together we had an explosive sexual life. But my greatest fantasy, a threesome with another girl, never happened, although my ex is bi. Well she's been with another guy for a few years now, and I see them about twice a week, when I pick up my daughter, or when they drop her off, and so I know vaguely about what is going on with them. Well recently I know of a good friend of theirs, a young attractive girl, who lives out of town but comes to stay overnights with them for sometimes three to four days at a time. This friend is married, but her husband never comes over to spend the nights, just her. This young friend of theirs also has a daughter around my daughters age. I know it shouldn't get to me, but its driving me crazy thinking that my ex might be giving her current bf threesomes, when we never got to have one. I can't seem to stop thinking about it. I have been checking their myspace pages every day, hungry for any scraps of info. I don't know why I am obssessin about it, and though I have no feelings for my ex anymore, I can't help but feel insanely jealous of her bf and upset with her if they are having threesomes. Link to post Share on other sites
Author delnoire Posted February 19, 2008 Author Share Posted February 19, 2008 I ran out of time on my first post, so heres a few more details. I know my ex and her bf are in an open relationship, swingers. When I looked at the myspace page of their young ladyfriend, it says that she is straight, but also a swinger. Her husband is also a swinger, but is not sure of his sexual orientation. I guess the reason I am posting this is because it is driving me crazy knowing that there is the possibility my ex is giving her bf threesomes. but I may be just overthinking it or worrying too much. So given the facts I've stated, do you think the threesomes are actually going on, or is it just my imagination? Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 I think it doesn't really matter unless they are endangering your child. Let it go, it's not your problem any more. Link to post Share on other sites
Obama08 Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 (edited) Two steps back man. Let it go. No sense hypothesizing. She could be doing anything and you'd never know for certain. The entire time I was married my wife was a straight vegetarian. As soon as we broke up she started eating meat and banging girls. Find yourself someone new to have a threesome with. I guarantee you'll have better sex than anything you're imagining your ex having, and what's more you'll know you're having it. Edited February 19, 2008 by Obama08 Link to post Share on other sites
Author delnoire Posted February 19, 2008 Author Share Posted February 19, 2008 I know I should just let it go, but for some reason I just can't. I mean, it would be so nice to be able to, but it bothers me. I guess maybe its because it is pretty much the ONLY fantasy we never got to experience together, and she knows it. So it might feel like they are laughing at me behind my back whenever they see me, thinking "ha, he wasn't man enough to bang you and another chick at the same time, but I am." And I know this is going to sound weird, but I'm way too aware of the whole 'we are really just mammals' thing, and if the bf is really having threesomes with my ex, then that makes him the alpha male, and me some kind of gamma male that couldn't conquer two girls at once, and I'm afraid those vibes are going to be picked up by my daughter and she'll instinctually start treating him like a father instead of me, because he would be the alpha-male. Pretty crazy I know, but that's what worries me. Link to post Share on other sites
Rachel_0814p Posted February 19, 2008 Share Posted February 19, 2008 So this isn't really a parenting issue, right? It sounds like it's more of a resentment issue because you're a bit jealous (and I mean that in a more, "HEY! WTF!" hands-up-in-the-air kinda thing than a, "I'm so jealous I want revenge" way.) You and your ex had issues, which is obvious because you're not together anymore. She probably feels intimately closer with her current boyfriend than she was able to feel with you. What can you really do but get over it or forget about it? If you're dying for a threesome, work on having better intimacy with your current (or if you're single, next) girlfriend and so that maybe she'll be willing to share that kind of experience with you. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 Maybe she thought you couldn't handle the emotional side of a 3-some, or she really couldn't handle sharing you with someone else. Now your M is over and she's with someone else, maybe she's grown and wants to try new things. Don't take it personally and don't make it about you. Link to post Share on other sites
shanny Posted February 20, 2008 Share Posted February 20, 2008 If you totally don't have feelings for her anymore this shouldn't be an issue. I'm sure you can find two chicks to have a threesome with and it will make this resentment go away. Link to post Share on other sites
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