i am gutted Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 hello everyone.....just a vent really. 6 months down the track and most days I have been doing well, working lots, keeping busy with my grown kids and all that jazz. but especially today I seem to have lost it . His fathers birthday was yesterday and the kids and I were asked out for his birthday dinner. it was nice to catch up with sis and bro in laws too. we were there on time (early) and he turned up late. sat down the other end of the table....where the last available seat was and all was going ok.....he asked how my day was etc etc and I was polite. we had dinner and kids were ready to go. I got up and hugged everyone goodbye and I wanted to hug him goodbye but just found myself saying seeya and walked out. He never got up to say bye so that was that. then tonight he turned up to watch the second half of my daughters game....he sat down the other end of the field and I don't know if he saw me or not. he ended up talking to another guy so I didn't go over there to say hi. end of game, he came over to see daughter and said hi. earlier in the day he did say he was going to try and turn up to watch. he didn't text so say hi Im here or what ever. am I expecting too much>? I just felt so ****e....my god I spent all my adult life looking after him, caring for him, and he cant even acknowledge me or give me a little respect? jut don't get how he can have fark all feelings for me now. sorry vent over. advice welcome. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 he didn't text so say hi Im here or what ever. am I expecting too much>? Yes, you are. You are not a couple any more. He has no obligation to inform you of his location or to communicate in any social setting. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RightThere Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 It is only six months, so things may change in the future, but it's still probably a bit too soon to be at the friend level you want. If I was to guess, you sound like you may still have a *tiny* torch for your ex and are wanting to get even a minimal amount of the old husband/wife interaction from him. If he's moved on, he'll be distant and you should be too. There is still a lot of healing to do I assume so you won't be able to do that if you're too buddy/buddy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 It would be best to stick to detached civility. That's all that is required for co-parenting. Keep it simple. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted August 24, 2015 Share Posted August 24, 2015 I got up and hugged everyone goodbye and I wanted to hug him goodbye but just found myself saying seeya and walked out. He never got up to say bye so that was that. I separated from my exW when our son was 3. The first time I hugged her after that (very stiff and awkward) was at his college graduation 20 years later. The "respect" he can show you at this point is to be responsible in his support and co-parenting. As others have pointed out, that's where your expectations should be... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
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