lark265 Posted June 25, 2015 Share Posted June 25, 2015 Very hard to know when to throw in the towel. And what will this do to the kids? Should I fight harder and be better and try to move back in? (my wife and I have been separated for about four years....the separation has been good for us and our two kids, but I guess I am fed up with being in the Limbo Land). And no real response from her....I think she wants to reconcile, but.....but.....I think I know deep down that I would be doing this for the kids......to keep the "normal appearance"....for their sakes. Like I said, how do you know when it's time? Link to post Share on other sites
ChicagoSparty Posted June 26, 2015 Share Posted June 26, 2015 It's time. Link to post Share on other sites
81West Posted June 26, 2015 Share Posted June 26, 2015 Very hard to know when to throw in the towel. And what will this do to the kids? Should I fight harder and be better and try to move back in? (my wife and I have been separated for about four years....the separation has been good for us and our two kids, but I guess I am fed up with being in the Limbo Land). And no real response from her....I think she wants to reconcile, but.....but.....I think I know deep down that I would be doing this for the kids......to keep the "normal appearance"....for their sakes. Like I said, how do you know when it's time? It is so tough. And everybody wants to do the right thing, choose the right balance, even if if that means tipping the scale way in the kids' favour at the expense of one's own dreams. Complicating it all is the fact that there are so many ways to look at things. There is little more that impacts and shapes a life than who one chooses as a partner. We all have hopes and dreams for our children, and rough scripts we imagine for their lives. One approach is to ask yourself if you would wish the marriage you have, or would anticipate having assuming reconciliation, on your children. If the quality of their marriages matched your own how would you feel? Would you be content for them, or would you worry about their hearts and souls and dreams? Would you want something more for them or would that be enough? Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted June 26, 2015 Share Posted June 26, 2015 I think I know deep down that I would be doing this for the kids......to keep the "normal appearance"....for their sakes. Since you're separated and only together part-time, you can keep the facade in place if you try hard enough. But full-time and for the rest of your life? Can't be done and, if attempted, sets a spectacularly bad example for your kids of what a relationship is. In short, either all-in or out. And if you can't commit to the former, after 4 years time to consider the latter... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
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