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Divorce Update


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Hey guys.. It's been a long long time since I have been on here. Things are good. Back in October I moved out into a nice townhouse. Also in October my divorce became final. Which I thought I would feel something but I didn't. I think it's because I knew the marriage was over well before then and that was just the paperwork to finalize it.

 

We have 50/50 custody of our son. I have a lot of free time on my hand which I am having a hard time finding things to do. I am still in therapy which has been helping me sort out thoughts and feelings. I have also been looking into dating again. Some may say it's too soon but really I was in a loveless marriage for at least 6-8 years so I am tired of being alone. I have recently, and I mean like last week, that has potential but have thoughts of what he is doing, is he meeting other people.. blah blah blah.. Not sure this is the board for that.

 

I did want to say to all of you that helped me months ago, Mr. Lucky, Jakrabit, Pickmeup, No Limit (just to name a few) I do appreciate each and everyone of you and the advice you have given me. I still need it so don't stop!!

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I have also been looking into dating again. Some may say it's too soon but really I was in a loveless marriage for at least 6-8 years so I am tired of being alone. I have recently, and I mean like last week, that has potential but have thoughts of what he is doing, is he meeting other people.. blah blah blah.. Not sure this is the board for that.

I think those "what is the ex doing" thoughts are common, I remember having them often after the divorce became final. Strangely, the solution was seeing my ex with someone (nice guy as it turned out) at a school function for our son. Knowing she'd moved on helped me do the same.

 

I think it's important to understand what you want from the dating scene. Companionship, sex and commitment are distinctly different parameters and it's easy for potential partners to get the wrong idea if you prioritize one above the others. Be honest and communicate up front.

 

Glad to hear things are going well. Keep posting...

 

Mr. Lucky

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If you're wary about investing yourself into another relationship before you've made up your mind what you actually want, perhaps some time for yourself only wouldn't be too bad at all. If you still have a few things on your list called "What I've always wanted to do", then start working on 'em. :D

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Thanks guys... Good to see you both here..

 

Mr. Lucky I could really careless about about what my ex is doing. I know he has moved on with another woman, mad how that happened, but I am happy to be out of the marriage and find someone that I deserve. (Therapy has helped me a lot) I know she is good to my son because he likes her. I hope to one day be able to have a conversation with her but still mad and bitter so it's no point now.

 

As for dating, I do know what I want. It's just a matter of finding a decent guy that isn't all about the sex. Boy dating has changed in 16 years LOL I am finding myself more open and out spoken when meeting someone and if they don't like it they know where the door is. Still dipping my toes in very very slowly though.

 

Hope everyone else is doing well! 2015 has to be better!! Happy New Year!

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