justanickname Posted July 25, 2016 Share Posted July 25, 2016 So, after more than 4 weeks NC, he reached out. In the last conversation, he denied to have a real talk. I was so despressed because he could easily let me wait for hours then canceled our meet because of different reasons. I told him at least twice that I didnt feel respected and he took me for granted. But any time I wanted to have a serious discussion, he always avoid. Thus I sent him a text saying for the last time how he disappointed me and I didnt want to continue and I did hope his behavior would improve. Anyway, for the last 4 weeks, I missed him sometimes but whenever I thought of his behavior, I always found no reason to contact him. I told him already that actions speak louder than words, and I saw no action from him to change my feeling. How strange, after more than a month, when I thought it was over, he sent me a msg to catch up. I hesitated but then said "hi" politely. And then he just msg me like the way we used to, like nothing ever happened! I ignored the text. Honestly if it was week ago I would be very happy, but now I just wonder. what he wants. Is it the same expectation with me (before) that we can at least maintain as acquaintances? So far he has been the only one that I can share or tell anything, and I do miss that sometimes, a friend or a place to vent. (vice versa). However I dont know. I feel confused. Should I just let it be and consider a second chance to keep the relationship as, friends or acquaintances? Or just ignore him, because I dont feel he has changed. I dont believe it, either. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted July 25, 2016 Share Posted July 25, 2016 Were you broken up or did he ghost you for 4 weeks? If he broke up with you -- he is not obligated to comfort your wounds nor be available for discussions. There are ex partners that will extend you the respect of a discussion but if they don't, you don't push and pressure. You accept that it is over and manage your pain and confusion in other ways. If he ghosted you, why would you want to even be friends with someone that treated you so disrespectfully? In both cases, block and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
gaig Posted July 25, 2016 Share Posted July 25, 2016 Sounds like you have been clear about which parts of his attitude are deal breakers and disappoint you. Is that correct? Great job Then please dont go back. One month is too short for him to reflect on any of that. As a matter of fact, he continued messaging you like a month ago. Nothing changed there. Protect yourself from a looming back2back heartbreak 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author justanickname Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 @Zahara: no, we didn't actually break up or anything, well, actually we are not really "official" in a relationship yet... The situation was simply no contact from both sides. For me there were nothing left to say, I told him everything already. He always avoids serious talk which makes me feed up with our "relationship" many times. But I always hope to hold for a friend. When he listens, he could be a very good friend, maybe that's why I hesitate to let it go totally. Link to post Share on other sites
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