Should I get back with my fling?

[Optimistic_girl86]

I am feeling really confused about my former fling. We dated passionately and intensely for about a month. We learned a lot about each other and we both made ourselves vulnerable. near the end of the fling he started to pull away and I confronted him and he said, "Things are the way they are, I have other things to do these days." He was being insensitive and I felt used. In anger and with hurt feelings, I ended our "courtship." I went to his home country and I texted him about it. He said that he was glad that I liked it. Then he saw me walking down the street about 3 months later (no contact for 3 months) and we started talking again. We made out about two weeks later (but no sex) and now I feel like he wants to be close again. I thought about him a lot and it was until recently that I wasn't really thinking about him.

 

I would like to be close again, but I think I need my space for a while because I don't know how things will end. I care for him deeply, and I enjoy being with him, but part of me just wants to be by myself, but I do want him in my life. When I look at him, I remember all of the good times (even though we only saw each other for a month) and how happy we were and could have been. We feel comfortable around each other. I don't think he knows how upset I was. I am not sure if he is lonely, wants to get back together, or just wants "fun." I know I have to tell him the things above, but any advice would help.

[OldRover]

I am feeling really confused about my former fling. We dated passionately and intensely for about a month. We learned a lot about each other and we both made ourselves vulnerable. near the end of the fling he started to pull away and I confronted him and he said, "Things are the way they are, I have other things to do these days." He was being insensitive and I felt used. In anger and with hurt feelings, I ended our "courtship." I went to his home country and I texted him about it. He said that he was glad that I liked it. Then he saw me walking down the street about 3 months later (no contact for 3 months) and we started talking again. We made out about two weeks later (but no sex) and now I feel like he wants to be close again. I thought about him a lot and it was until recently that I wasn't really thinking about him.

 

I would like to be close again, but I think I need my space for a while because I don't know how things will end. I care for him deeply, and I enjoy being with him, but part of me just wants to be by myself, but I do want him in my life. When I look at him, I remember all of the good times (even though we only saw each other for a month) and how happy we were and could have been. We feel comfortable around each other. I don't think he knows how upset I was. I am not sure if he is lonely, wants to get back together, or just wants "fun." I know I have to tell him the things above, but any advice would help.

 

 

A month is really short, but you should perhaps put some effort into it to really try to figure out where this is going, and he will have to respond positively.

 

Perhaps suggest a lunch or dinner out, spend a bit more time talking with him and try to find out where he's going. And, even if it's positive, you'll have to tred somewhat cautiously for a while.