creyente7 Posted November 18, 2014 Share Posted November 18, 2014 Do girls ever look back at the good memories? What's their view on it... Does it mean much to then? Does it make them realize what they've lost? My now ex has a brain of a puffer fish. She's fairly smart, but when it comes to memories, I don't know if she legitely doesn't remember or just not the person to look back. She always says the past is the past, always move forward. I'm sure we created memories and bond that doesn't just disappear. I think it just hasn't hit her yet because she is still on the relief phase of a break up. How long does a girl take before she starts to reminisce? A month? 2 months? Just curious. Link to post Share on other sites
Mi7522 Posted November 18, 2014 Share Posted November 18, 2014 Just a hunch but I would think it takes them about 0.000095 days to star to reminisce. Again this is not from a scientific calculation just a hunch 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author creyente7 Posted November 18, 2014 Author Share Posted November 18, 2014 Just a hunch but I would think it takes them about 0.000095 days to star to reminisce. Again this is not from a scientific calculation just a hunch Lol wish i could relate. No clue what that means Link to post Share on other sites
SteveDC Posted November 18, 2014 Share Posted November 18, 2014 Just a hunch but I would think it takes them about 0.000095 days to star to reminisce. Again this is not from a scientific calculation just a hunch I'm assuming you won't tell us if your hunch is founded on you being a female/male? Link to post Share on other sites
sadsoymilk Posted November 18, 2014 Share Posted November 18, 2014 I am a female, and maybe this is just me, but I reminisce daily. Now, I tend to be a bit of a daydreamer and I'm thinking CONSTANTLY, but I remember the good times and the bad times - with all of my exes, not just the most recent one. Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted November 18, 2014 Share Posted November 18, 2014 Yes they do. I recently had lunch with my ex girlfriend that broke up with me. 6 month relationship ended in mid April and NC for 3 months prior to her contacting me again in Oct. For a time I was wondering the same thing. Does she even think about me at all? Was it too short a time period for me to even be in her thoughts at all any more? And then out of the blue she contacts me. At lunch she reminisced a lot. I was surprised at the specifics she remembered. We only talked about the good times because even though it was a short time, we did a lot together. So bottom line is YES, they do remember and always will, but it does not mean that they miss the good times so much that they want to get back together and when you see them after a while you may feel the same. They may not think about you every day. They may not remember the same things you do, but when you have a close, intimate relationship with someone and you had so many good times, those will be with both of you forever. It's all good. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
AlwaysPuzzled Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 I'm still in the midst of deep heartbreak over the ending of a very short relationship (perfect for 6 weeks, no speaking for the next 2 months, back on for a perfect week, and then several more weeks of hardly talking). I reminisce every single day. And it HURTS, so very badly, to think of it. I'll catch myself smiling as I remember, and the next second I feel like crying because it's all over. I'm an emotional wreck. I try sometimes NOT to reminisce because it hurts too bad; but other times, I do it because it's all I have left of him. :( Link to post Share on other sites
lollipopspot Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 Do girls ever look back at the good memories? What's their view on it... Does it mean much to then? Does it make them realize what they've lost? Females are not a different species, you know. Why would males reminisce, but females not? Link to post Share on other sites
Author creyente7 Posted November 23, 2014 Author Share Posted November 23, 2014 Females are not a different species, you know. Why would males reminisce, but females not? I guess the question is, do women tend to do it more than men? I mean women think with emotions, men think with logic...so I guess theres the difference. Link to post Share on other sites
lollipopspot Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 I guess the question is, do women tend to do it more than men? I mean women think with emotions, men think with logic...so I guess theres the difference. Uh no. But as for your question, I reckon it's different for different people how much they engage in reminiscing. If there's a dramatic gender difference, you'll have to provide some evidence for it, because I don't see why there would be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author creyente7 Posted November 23, 2014 Author Share Posted November 23, 2014 Uh no. But as for your question, I reckon it's different for different people how much they engage in reminiscing. If there's a dramatic gender difference, you'll have to provide some evidence for it, because I don't see why there would be. Just a scientific guess per se. Uhm I just know that women are more emotional than men, or atleast use emotions more efficiently than men. So they probably flashback more with the good feelings from an old relationship, like "I felt so good with him" type of way. Like I said, just a guess. Link to post Share on other sites
samg313 Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Women's minds work different than Men's do. Women are more likely to build a fantasy up of the man at the start of the relationship (many times unrealistic expectations). While the man might do a little of this he usually waits and sees but after a couple of months of things going well, he gets more into his emotions. Many times when the guy falls short of the fantasy or expectations, the woman will seek a new fantasy to build and move on to the next one. Leaving you with a year or a few years of memories and things that you associate with that woman. She might look back and smile once in awhile but it won't haunt her, unless the other guy calls it off during her fantasy stage and that is when she would be most likely to contact you if you were good to her. A soft pillow to break her fall, then she will proceed to chase the fantasy again while you wait by phone. She will give you just enough to keep you on the line, until she finds the next fantasy to build. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 Do girls ever look back at the good memories? What's their view on it... Does it mean much to then? Does it make them realize what they've lost?... I think it just hasn't hit her yet because she is still on the relief phase of a break up. It depends on the relationship, if it was mostly bad or perhaps abusively bad then the bad memories may be to the fore always. If someone head-butted you and broke your nose, you are unlikely to concentrate on that time he brought you flowers from the garden and put the petals on the bed are you? If he never listened to a word you said and he lowered your self esteem, then you are hardly likely to remember that time he bought your favourite perfume, or that time he cooked you a great meal and you ate it under the stars and had great sex afterwards. If he cheated, then that may block a whole lot of good memories as each one will be polluted with the thought of the OW and his lies to you. Thinking your ex will suddenly ditch the relief and come running back to you thinking good thoughts about what she lost, is probably unlikely. Anyone who says they are "relieved" when a relationship ends, rarely regrets that decision. Link to post Share on other sites
bubbletea Posted November 30, 2014 Share Posted November 30, 2014 I would say I only reminisce about the one I really liked who "got away"...who was really sweet overall like one of the best boyfriends. But it only happens once in a blue moon, or when I'm tired of being single. The other few guys who have been in my life? I don't think about it at all, the bad memories overshadow all the good. Link to post Share on other sites
Thegreatestthing Posted November 30, 2014 Share Posted November 30, 2014 Guys I left no I never think of them again. Guy thSt left me yes I stalk his Facebook everyday. Do girls ever look back at the good memories? What's their view on it... Does it mean much to then? Does it make them realize what they've lost? My now ex has a brain of a puffer fish. She's fairly smart, but when it comes to memories, I don't know if she legitely doesn't remember or just not the person to look back. She always says the past is the past, always move forward. I'm sure we created memories and bond that doesn't just disappear. I think it just hasn't hit her yet because she is still on the relief phase of a break up. How long does a girl take before she starts to reminisce? A month? 2 months? Just curious. Link to post Share on other sites
Mi7522 Posted December 1, 2014 Share Posted December 1, 2014 I'm assuming you won't tell us if your hunch is founded on you being a female/male? I'm a male but for any break up whether you're male/female and the relationship had nothing to do you with cheating and/or being abusive, then I would think any human, as soon as that door shuts, will reminisce instantly whether or not they are doing the right thing Link to post Share on other sites
radiodarcy Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I'm not sure there's a difference between men and women reminscing but speaking as a woman it depends on how significant the relationship was. My first - - as last relationship ended four years ago. It was terrible and I really can't even remember the good times it was so bad. That being said I still think about him everyday and all I remember is the bad times - - which is probably why I haven't been in a relationship since :/ That being said I don't really remember a lot of specifics. There are certain things he said that stand out. But much. For the most part it's all one big blur. I have dated a few guys in between - - but they ended before they could even become relationships - - and I don't really think much on those at all. Link to post Share on other sites
leoc1973 Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I would say it depends on the girl. I have an ex from 20 years ago. We dated for a year and a half and were both virgins and never even had sex. She contacts me at least once a week on FB telling me things like I was the one that got away. She is married with 3 kids and we had coffee a few times and she tells me things like she wants to just run away with me. She constantly reminisces and remembers things from 20 years ago like it was yesterday. One of my last girlfriends we were together 6 years and only broke up a couple years ago we had a very deep connection, were going to get married ect. I met her a bunch of times since and she won't even shed a tear. When I brought up old times she would act like she can't even remember. She hasnt' contacted me in a long time. My point. It depends on the girl. They are all the same species yes but not the same person. I think the biggest factor is how happy she is with whom she is with now. Obviously if the first girl was in a loving marriage she wouldn't be trying to have an affair with me. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I remember frequently good times i have had........and causes me to smile remembering them......i have had many good times with not just one but plural, its why friendship is possible with most of my exes..........but the fact remains along with the good ....i remember why we broke up and that fact remains overall......doesnt hurt anymore......but those memories exist of the pain i went through......all of us went through... and i can not change the past so i choose not to put myself or anyone else through that again....i can only go forward and remember good times fondly...deb Link to post Share on other sites
lil hoodlum Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 One of my last girlfriends we were together 6 years and only broke up a couple years ago we had a very deep connection, were going to get married ect. I met her a bunch of times since and she won't even shed a tear. When I brought up old times she would act like she can't even remember. She hasnt' contacted me in a long time. My point. It depends on the girl. I agree, depends on the girl. Some women are very cold hearted though. It also seems that if the breakup was bad and/or the woman totally did you wrong, they never reach out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MovingOnIsHard Posted December 3, 2014 Share Posted December 3, 2014 I'm female and not a day goes by where I don't reminisce about my ex.. I would probably have asked the same question re males lol Link to post Share on other sites
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