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How to once more enjoy things associated with an EX?


LordRorek

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Hey, lately I have been thinking about things that I love but unfortunately remind me of my EX and by extension the traumatic break up I went through.

 

Like I love the Beatles but my ex was the one who introduced me to them and so I have a lot of memories associated with their songs.

 

So I haven't listened to the Beatles in over a year...

 

This annoys me because:

 

A. I hate the idea that her memory is keeping me from enjoying something I love.

B. Because I don't like being randomly ambushed by things like this and subsequently having to deal with the painful memories.

 

I know eventually I will be able to enjoy these things again because some of these things have already lost there sting, but I was wondering if there was a way to expedite this process?

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small_hand_of_power

I had this same problem, specifically with music. I wouldn't say there is necessarily a way to expedite the process other than treating it for what it is, music. Do you like the music or the memory behind the music? For me, after a while, I learned that I did, infact actually like the music my ex showed me and I still listen to it from time to time. The memories are kind of still there but for the most part, they're gone. I mean not gone but I can separate them.

 

Hope this helped somehow.

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Hey, lately I have been thinking about things that I love but unfortunately remind me of my EX and by extension the traumatic break up I went through.

 

Like I love the Beatles but my ex was the one who introduced me to them and so I have a lot of memories associated with their songs.

 

So I haven't listened to the Beatles in over a year...

 

This annoys me because:

 

A. I hate the idea that her memory is keeping me from enjoying something I love.

B. Because I don't like being randomly ambushed by things like this and subsequently having to deal with the painful memories.

 

I know eventually I will be able to enjoy these things again because some of these things have already lost there sting, but I was wondering if there was a way to expedite this process?

 

It sucks because today at work they played this song that my ex and I used to listen to all the time and it just brought back memories to when we went bowling that one Friday night and they played that song and we had so much fun....or we used to watch Game of Thrones together but now I can't even start the new season because of him...

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Felt the same way too with music. Initially, I would suggest removing all anchors that may trigger memories of your ex - this incldues music, photos, artices of clothing, etc.

 

However, after a period of time, you do eventually have to face the music again so to speak. Personally, I forced myself to listen to an album of Mayer Hawthorne until the sadness was removed. Or at least enough until I wasn't crying anymore. I kept going until now, I can finally enjoy it.

 

It takes time and lots of tears. In the end, you'll get your.music back. Good luck.

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Everybody has that same feeling. What works for me is to just do, listen, eat, wear whatever it is I like. If I shared it with my ex... too bad, I will make new memories with someone else. Don't think there is any other way honestly. Had to learn that the hard way after being afraid of lasagna for 3 years because it reminded me of my ex. It ended when I decided I had enough of that and decided to just continue with my life.

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