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My boyfriend has just ended it with me after we have bought a house together!!


Aboohoo

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[] My boyfriend of 5 years has just ended it with me just 2 months after we have bought a house together!!!

 

We've been together for 5 years like i said and we had a good relationship. We lived together for 3.5-4 years and have spent the last year house hunting and we finally found 'the one' and bought it :) We moved in in June this year and for the first few weeks all was OK but in the last 2 months he had become cold and distant to me and things were really strained.

 

His general happiness was also brought into question as he lost all interest in all his passions (sport, hobbies etc) lost his appetite and he hates his job and so was really down all the time. The only time he was happy was when he was with his friends.

 

Anyway this caused me to have lots of tears and talks - like your ex mine is not a good talker, in fact he hates it and would just rather keep everything in than have an 'uncomfrtable conversation' There were several talks and moments when we would agree to give things another go but soon after it would be clear that all the effort was coming from me and not him.

 

Therefore after 2 months I moved out to get some space and then we came to the conclusion that we should call it a day (i felt like i was forced to give this answer - he made it so clear that this is what he wanted from his actions)

 

So after 2 months of owning our house it's now on the market again. I am absolutely heart broken and now living back at my parents while he is still there (he has nowhere else to go) NC is not an option right now as we have to sort out the house and finances etc... He's told me that he just wants to live on his own with no house or no girlfriend!!!!! Nice ey?

 

I think just like your ex he couldn't handle the commitment of a house and what that implied. WHY DO IT THEN??? It's now such a mess.

 

He seems happy and i am heart broken - i miss him. I love him.

 

I'm not sure if there is another girl on the scene - he's always been loyal and faithful. I just feel so replaced like you said. He has fallen out of love with me and is happy - but as his head isn't 'happy' in general I worry he's not making the right decisions.

 

Will he regret his actions? Throwing it all away?

 

Sorry i'm not sure if i'm making any sense as my head is all over the place and my fingers can't keep up with my thoughts.

 

Please help LS x

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
moved this post into its own thread from another member's thread ~6
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He seems happy and i am heart broken - i miss him. I love him. [...] He has fallen out of love with me and is happy - but as his head isn't 'happy' in general I worry he's not making the right decisions.

 

Will he regret his actions? Throwing it all away?

I am really sorry for you. Feelings unfortunately cannot be forced, with what I read he does not sound like a good investment: not being able to talk like an adult about feelings. It sometimes can make me a bit mad how many women always seem to fall for emotional neanderthals, but I guess such is the world. You should start worrying about you right now! He is in an egocentric mode. He might come back back (he probably will) but you have to keep your dignity. If you take him back he knows he can do things like this. Yes life is horrible sometimes.

 

Depression is also a lousy reason to allow for dick moves like this. I have been rock bottom myself a few times, and yes it makes you want to do things by yourself, sometimes out of shame, but still ... I never will understand fools pushing people away that love them.

 

Try to be kind to yourself, choose for you.

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