alias4255 Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 I just put two and two together. I saw photos of them together from last night, and there are photos of them together from before we broke up, and she spent a night at his house in mid-December. It was after they came back from a trip they went to with their martial arts school. They got back at like 3 in the morning and she said she slept at his place because she didn't want to take the train home so late at night. To make matters worse, this guy was an instructor in a dance class we took together 2 years ago, and after she started joined the martial arts place all of a sudden he was there too. He lives like a block away from the school. Not that it matters at this point, but she gave me completely different reasons for the breakup, stating specifically that she is not looking for anyone else and needs alone time. It just makes me feel like the whole 3.5 years were a big fat lie. I poured my heart and soul into this relationship. There was never a face to face or for that matter even a phone conversation regarding the breakup. Just an email. I just feel used and discarded. Right now I'm a shell of a human being. Never thought she would do this to me. If you click my username there's an older thread with some more context. Link to post Share on other sites
minimariah Posted February 1, 2016 Share Posted February 1, 2016 I just feel used and discarded. Right now I'm a shell of a human being. Never thought she would do this to me. no one ever does -- that's why it hurts so much; the element of surprise. i'm very sorry for what you're going through & it seems like this is your very first heartbreak. i will tell you one thing - you WILL get over it and move on. trust me, don't even doubt it. don't think too much about them as possibly a new couple, try to distance yourself from the entire situation. take your time to go through phases and be angry and sad and mad and write it all down or take it out in martial arts or music or whatever helps you... find something to vent. be prepared for them to come out as an official couple. go with the worst case scenario. also go full NC with her. if you see her, politely say hello & keep walking. other than that - don't give her that satisfaction to hear anything else from you. if she texts you, do NOT text back. i know it's not easy... don't really have any advice for you. it sucks when you realize there was an entire backreason for the break up & that you were actually dumped for someone else. but look at this from this point of view - the reasons she gave you were probably true for HER & she "forgot" to mention the new dude because she either didn't want to hurt you or she wanted to save face... and probably both. this new dude is only the trigger, she was checked out emotionally for some time. i'm really sorry, hang in there! you seem like such a sweetie, it will go well for you... plenty of loves will come to you, trust. Link to post Share on other sites
Author alias4255 Posted February 3, 2016 Author Share Posted February 3, 2016 Thank you. I really appreciate your response. Sorry I can't muster up a better expression of gratitude. Everything is so difficult now. Link to post Share on other sites
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