Brandonjuswantslove Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 Sooooooo idk where to start it seems like every time me and my lover don't talk we miss each other like magnets but when we do reconnect we fight over stupid things tht won't even matter the next day she says I'm clingy and emotional I don't try to be I have to push feelings aside a lot cuz thts the only way we get along I love to show her affection maybe too much but idk so ladies I really need ur voice on this how much affection is considered smothering and needy/clingy and could u ever date ur ex tht u once considered clingy and emotional if he was trying to be better but struggles along the way I'm not perfect I'm no saint by any means a lot of ****ed up things have taken place on both sides but I'm not ready to give up on her I love her with all my heart and I always will but she says she docent want a relationship with what should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 It's tough to answer this because as evidenced by many of the posts on this forum, it truly does seem like the most magnetic of connections involve one person who is more emotionally-inclined than the other. The passion you both experience is probably from giving each other what you both inherently need. She gives you a dose of logic and rationality and you give her some good old fuzzy warm love and emotional depth. Maybe the solution is finding someone more compatible with your needs? Honestly, I want someone who is clingy and needy, but yet I'm drawn to the apathetic ones. Then I'm apathetic towards the clingy/needy ones. It's effed up, really. Love doesn't really make sense. I think for it to work when you're clingy and your partner is a bit more emotionally distant is to accept each other. Seems like you're a bit more compromising in that regard though, given that you've stated you push aside your feelings so as not to disrupt the peace. That's not fair to you. Something's gotta change there. It takes two to make a relationship functional and fair to both parties. You gotta meet halfway or is it's just going to be a constant source of pain and drama. Just my 2 lovely cents. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Itspointless Posted January 31, 2015 Share Posted January 31, 2015 Hi Brandon, I am no lady, sorry. Have you ever heard about the Anxious-Avoidant trap? I am curious if you recognize this: https://aloftyexistence.wordpress.com/2011/02/09/anxious-avoidant-trap/ Read also a bit on the types mentioned there. Sooooooo idk where to start it seems like every time me and my lover don't talk we miss each other like magnets but when we do reconnect we fight over stupid things tht won't even matter the next day she says I'm clingy and emotional I don't try to be I have to push feelings aside a lot cuz thts the only way we get along I love to show her affection maybe too much but idk so ladies I really need ur voice on this how much affection is considered smothering and needy/clingy and could u ever date ur ex tht u once considered clingy and emotional if he was trying to be better but struggles along the way I'm not perfect I'm no saint by any means a lot of ****ed up things have taken place on both sides but I'm not ready to give up on her I love her with all my heart and I always will but she says she docent want a relationship with what should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
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