Ex holds lots of anger

[bran1210]

Okay so here it goes. Just over 2 months ago, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me. The breakup came out of nowhere. When I mean out of nowhere, I mean it went from a perfectly normal day to complete meltdown within 12 hours.

 

Most of the relationship was perfectly fine. We saw each other every weekend, and texted all day every day. However, when we rarely fought, they were always over text. She never wanted to argue in person. Mostly we fought about not texting her back within 3 hours or so. In total, outside of work, this maybe occurred a total of 4 or 5 times in the year we dated. None of those times ended without us texting before going to bed. Looking back, it was weird. She also was upset that we didn't get out enough during the weekends (again, only telling me this only text), so I proposed we go out each weekend during the summer. All this time, she said she was happier about our time together. We also had other minor differences. Overall, every argument ended up one sided. She was not the type to compromise nor the type to admit any fault.

 

When she broke up with me, it started because I didn't text her back for 4 hours. Her reasoning was that it didn't seem like I cared about her because she didn't see a text from me between the two hockey games she played in that night. There was nothing I could do to stop her, as hard as I tried.

 

I made the mistake of breaking no contact a couple weeks later begging for her back. Her response was very unsettling. Her long email back pretty much consisted of placing entire blame on everything bad in the relationship on me, accepting no responsibility on her own actions. She also either grossly exaggerated any of my faults, or came up with crazy reasons like her being unhappy the whole summer, contradicting what she told me before during the relationship. Probably the most outrageous excuse she used was her interpretation of me randomly massaging the back of her head, for which she both enjoyed and did to me all the time, as no more then a gesture equivalent to petting a dog. I have never heard of that before from anyone. So I wondered if she was simply trying to come up with things to justify her decision. She also did not want to acknowledge that I did anything to address her "quality time" problems she told me about, despite keeping to my word each weekend to have us go out and do stuff together. I never felt so unappreciated before and had no idea she thought that way. I learned a lot more about her as a result of her response email.

 

Anyway, we are still friends on Facebook. To this day, about once a week, she posts random songs or lyrics related to how the guy will never get a girl like her again or how the guy never truly had her. Basically, a lot of negative stuff. Also, I am a hockey goalie. I subbed in for a team that played against her team one night. I suspected she would be pretty pissed when she saw I was there. I was right. She avoided me like the plague and even called her parents to come while she played. After the game, I told her she played well while she was skating by, but just kept skating and said "thanks" in a low mumble. Her parents were very civil with me when I talked to them briefly while she was in the locker room. That was pleasant.

 

I also have a buddy that plays goalie and he subbed in for her team one night. He told me she acted like a bitch to him the whole night, even when he attempted to compliment her defense. She was also the only one to not say "good game" to him of everyone on the team. Yes, she knows he is a close friend of mine.

 

Funny enough though, she was nice enough to text my mom randomly a couple of weeks ago about a concert that was on Netflix she should watch. I am at least thankful she was nice to her.

 

Overall, I am curious why she has been so negative towards me, even passively. The level of negativity towards me feels like she was cheated on or something. Of course I didn't. I was an overall good guy to her, made my share of mistakes, of course. However, I was never above being too pride to admit my own faults, as she always knew when we dated. I just want to know why she is acting the way she is. I have never encountered this kind of behavior before from a woman after a breakup. Hence, this is highly confusing. Anyone have any insights they can provide?

[herself]

A drama Queen. After her scathing email she wanted you to chase her, convince her YOU will change, and admit you caused ALL her problems.

She is unhappy deep down.

She needs to change and mature and get HER self together.

You dodged a bullet she just needs to grow up and you are better off without this drama.