zhaulk Posted October 27, 2014 Share Posted October 27, 2014 Alright so I haven't posted in a while, but in that time I have found out a lot about myself. A lot of this is pretty much embarrassing to admit/confess to but I feel like it's the only way I can change things about myself. The good news is: I'm over my ex. First of all, my ex literally could have been anybody. Anytime I met a new girl of any merit what-so-ever and we were hitting it off in any shape or form, I didn't even think about her. So really, it was never her personality or who she was. She literally could have been anybody..all she did was validate me, and helped me rid of my insecurities. When we were together, I didn't feel inadequate or anything, but I do when I'm single. I always have this feeling that I need to be with someone. It's incredibly pathetic. In reality I haven't had that much experience with women..and I'm never sure if I'm attractive or anything. I can't figure it out, but I really am tired of feeling this way. Every time I start something up with a new girl, I'm so clingy and I catch myself responding to texts and calls way too quickly, making myself extremely available, even changing my personality to suit what I MIGHT think they will want or like. I thought about it and I can't really figure it out. What makes me so uncomfortable being alone? I have insecurities like anyone else: I'm overweight (though I have lost about 50 pounds and I'm doing a good job losing more), I'm kind of losing my hair, I have crooked teeth..but it's all trivial stuff that everyone deals with. Why do I have such a hard time with it? I'm not particularly wealth nor do I have a great job, but I feel like that's probably normal for a lot of guys my age (I'm 24). I am in college and trying to better myself, and all of these things help..however it seems like at the root I always feel like I'm incomplete because I'm alone. It's so embarrassing to admit this stuff even anonymously, and it's soo cliche. But I really have trouble with this. I think about being happy, and for some reason it's always about being with someone that loves me, I don't even think about me loving them. It's like I don't even have very high standards anymore, and yet I'm so young. I've only been single for 7 months! In fact, I was dating someone a few months ago..so I haven't even really been single that long. I really would love any input on this, and I know I seem pathetic, but I really don't want to be anymore. I hate being this way. I mean on the flip side I love so much about myself..I'm really outgoing and I love talking to people, despite being insecure about my looks I do like my face. I also..catch myself fishing for compliments, as if I'm seeking validation. Even if I'm dating someone..I also find myself constantly kind of asking for relationship updates etc, just being clingy in general. I really think I've always been this way, but I totally want to change it. If anyone has any advice I really appreciate it, and thanks for taking the time to read this crap. Link to post Share on other sites
Reels Posted October 28, 2014 Share Posted October 28, 2014 I don't think that you are over her. Otherwise you wouldn't be losing weight like this. What you have to do is, you have to concentrate on your fundamental duties, look for some hobbies. Maybe you will find a new way of life and recover your confidence. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zhaulk Posted October 29, 2014 Author Share Posted October 29, 2014 I'm losing weight on purpose. I'm positive that I'm over her. Thank you for your words though, and I'll try to do that. Anyone else have any insight? Link to post Share on other sites
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