Roses777 Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 Went from FWB with my ex to mere friends and I can't say that I am too happy about it. Don't see any point in hanging out with my ex unless here are "benefits" for myself. Apparently I had upset my ex by kissing her on the lips the last time I saw her.. I did it twice.. she said she was drunk and didn't like it.. Said she turned her head away but she never said it wasn't cool until now. On the plus side, she has got a job locally here when she was going to move halfway across the country. But she asked me not to kiss her again or try to the next time we hangout. Now she just wants to be friends... which kind of sucks if I am hanging out with her. "oh um if u can when we next hang out can u not kiss me. i wasnt comfortable. i dont kiss my friends. thanks" ... Plus this: "no... u didnt notice i wasnt kissing u back? or that i turned my head away? i was totally doing that" Plus: exgf: it kinda freaked me out and not in a good way me: Well, glad you told me now. heh Freaked you out? How so? I mean, if we're being totally honest here. exgf: like not supposed to, like, dunno, it was wrong to have it happen, better if we friends Should I rarely hangout with her? I don't see any point if there aren't any benefits. Link to post Share on other sites
Simon Phoenix Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 You shouldn't have been hanging out with her in the first place. She was right to call off the FWB. It's time for you to move forward from this instead of living off the FWB scraps and, now, the "just friends" scraps. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Roses777 Posted July 25, 2014 Author Share Posted July 25, 2014 She was being forward with me and approached me with the FWB. I agree not to accept mere friendship and tell her that I'm not comfortable with being just friends. I don't mind hanging out if it is meaningless FWB but "just friends" is a waste of valuable time. Link to post Share on other sites
love1336x Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 So she okay with you putting your penis or lips on her vagina, but kissing a big no no? Well that makes sense. You don't have sex with friends either. Sorry. She's a hot mess. She wants you to chase and give her attention. Leave her alone. Try NC for a week and she if she not up your butt wanting to kiss. Link to post Share on other sites
central Posted July 25, 2014 Share Posted July 25, 2014 My view of FWB is that they are still friend material if the benefits stop. If not, they are probably only f*** buddies. She seems to have some idea that kissing isn't FWB behavior, but I think that's a silly distinction. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Roses777 Posted July 25, 2014 Author Share Posted July 25, 2014 I wasn't sure if that is what she meant or not but it sounded like she wanted to get the perks of hanging-out (not being lonely) without putting out. I didn't want to suddenly be friends and not be able to act out what I wanted to do. Yeah, I do think she'll come around eventually too. I told her last night that I had put some thought into it and I cannot be just friends with her. It just wouldn't be in our best interests. I want to date someone and she wants friendship+companionship. Told her that the awkwardness of having dated and hanging out again would always be there. Plus the memories of us together would never go away completely. Thus, I told her there are other girls that want to date me and it wouldn't be fair to them for me to spend time with her alone, etc. I suggested staying as friends on Facebook but I'm looking to date and she wants friendship+companionship in a BF/GF vein which is impossible when I want everything else that goes with "that in-depth of intimacy with a partner". Think I handled it really well. I enjoy hanging out with her but not at the expense of my sexuality. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Roses777 Posted July 31, 2014 Author Share Posted July 31, 2014 Here's an update of sorts. Although she agreed through Facebook that we could be 'Facebook only' friends, she removed me from her very-limited Facebook profile on Sunday. I probably should not have asked why she was hurt but she said that there was no point in being Facebook friends if we would never meet up in person and hangout. So I said it obviously hurt her feelings a lot if she never saw me again so I suggested we could meet-up and discuss things. If not, I said that I wish her all of the best as well for the future. So I was mature about it and she is upset that I want to move on and find someone else after she clearly indicated she wanted to hangout and no more FWB. *shrugs* She read my message but did not reply. My girl-friend suggested that I give my exgf loads of space right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts