Day 52 No Contact :(

[simplicity1]

It's day 52 no contact after my 3 month relationship which came after loosely 3 years of singledom. Im 23.

 

I'm ok. Good things have happened in other parts of my life. I've accepted that my ex simply must not have actually been that into me throughout the 3 months, and that our breakup must have largely been the result of this reality hitting him too.

 

but man, I wish I wasn't still counting. I was really attracted to this guy. I wish our relationship could have deepened. I saw and felt so much potential.

 

Although I've entertained the idea, I've not really felt any legitimate urge to contact him throughout this period, mostly because of accepting that he's not that into me despite everything he said throughout the 3 months.

 

But I'm still terrified on a daily basis of running into him, I flash back to moments from the breakup that weaken me, and I think of both wonderful and painful moments from our time together on a daily basis despite every effort to stop. [Ok- I do still check his online dating profile to make sure he's still logging in and hasn't started dating someone else. This is one thing I can't get myself to stop]

 

I'm EXTREMELY proactive about meeting people to date. I have a very particular sense of what I'm looking for, and I figure that if I'm going to be particular then I must be proactive. Always talking to guys at the gym, average about 1 online date per week (rarely give a guy a second date though). I don't think I'm overly particular, since I can easily list 5 or 6 people from my life who I was genuinely and deeply attracted to, one whom I dated for 1+ years in college and one of them this 3 month relationship. But it still just feels like such a rare occassion that I'm in a relationship Once I'm in one, I prioritize it so much.

 

Is there anything else that can help snap me out of this sadness and clinging? Thanks...

[roger136913]

I will say congrats as I am on day 3 wish I had your strength.