drummer4sho Posted May 1, 2003 Share Posted May 1, 2003 I'm so hopelessly in love with this girl I met only a few months ago. I'm 18 and never felt like this about anyone in my life. She just started coming to my school and is in the drumline that I'm captain for. During summer band she would always make sure that she was around me and if I wasn't there, when I came back she'd let me know that she missed me. I made friends with her friends and her twin sister(they're not identical twins). We'd do everything together and I told her things that I hadn't told anyone. I have a real problem trusting people. She kept telling me that I could trust her and that she'd always be there for me. We even had rings that we wore to show each other how much we meant to the other person. My friends all joked with me that I was whipped. Then we had Christmas break and since her mom doesn't like me beacuse her daughter is 16 I wasn't allowed to see her for 2 weeks. When I came back the first week was like normal but then she seemed to cut me off completely. She stopped asking me to go see her between classes, stopped wearing her ring, and stopped eating lunch w/me. That hurt! I tried talking to her but whenever I asked if I did something or if everything was o.k. she'd just shrug me off and walk away. This all happened in February and I'm still having trouble coping. We barley talk anymore and it hurts because I have to see her in classes and at lunch. I still want to see her at her locker and just talk to her but I don't know what to say. I've never given my heart to someone like this before. I just got the courage to put all the notes she wrote me and the ring she got me in a box so I wouldn't see them anymore, but I still have pictures of her and hear songs that remind me of her. I've broken down a few times just when I hear one of those songs. This is killing me. Does anyone have any advice? drummer4sho Link to post Share on other sites
Leikela Posted May 2, 2003 Share Posted May 2, 2003 [color=indigo] There is no way to know exactly why she cut you off. I am sorry that you are hurting so much. Love is never an easy emotion to deal with. However, you are dealing with it well. The fact that you were finally able to put the stuff she gave you away is the first step in healing. It is a long process, but you have started along that journey. The only thing you can do at this point is accept that you have lost her and try to move on. Maybe she'll come around eventually and offer an explanation for her actions, but it's better if you don't aniticpate that ever happening. Be happy that you were able to open up your heart and love. Learn from this experience and you'll find someone you can love even more and she'll love you just as much in return. [/color] Link to post Share on other sites
NEONINK Posted May 7, 2003 Share Posted May 7, 2003 From your post, I think you have a great heart. You mention you are a captain, that's leadership. You mention you hurt, that's emotionally healthy. You mention you tried to talk to her, that's a sign of a committed, caring, in touch human being that can communicate. I think you will eventually be ready for a new relationship with perhaps someone more your age. A 16-year-old probably isn't ready for all that. You sound like a really cool person that I would let me daughter date. You have it together. Link to post Share on other sites
Good Advice :) Posted May 21, 2003 Share Posted May 21, 2003 The first problem is you tried to have a relationship in high school. Don't do this. Have fun. Have lots of fun. Don't get attached. Too early. ESPECIALLY FOR GIRLS!!! lol Link to post Share on other sites
Author drummer4sho Posted May 22, 2003 Author Share Posted May 22, 2003 I know I shouldn't have gotten too attached. I tried at the beginning when she was always around me to just keep my distance and hang out with other people. Then she would get really upset at me. She would still hang around me as much,she just would make me feel bad. And we weren't even dating at that point. So I finally gave in, but told her straight up that I have problems trusting people so not to take anything too personal or seriously. She said o.k. but eventually would get angry when I wasn't acting like she wanted me to. I told myself not to let her get too close, but somehow she squeezed her way in. Link to post Share on other sites
NEONINK Posted May 23, 2003 Share Posted May 23, 2003 "She just would make me feel bad" It wasn't you sweetie, there's nothing wrong with you. She has problems and will need to grow up and deal with her anger and issues. The next time someone causes you to feel bad, don't get into a relationship with them. (I'll try and remember the same.) When you find someone that doesn't make you feel bad, you will be on the right path. Look for a lesson from this experience, and at least all won't be lost. Link to post Share on other sites
Author drummer4sho Posted May 24, 2003 Author Share Posted May 24, 2003 I didn't realize we were going to end up in a relationship. It just sort of happened. Whenever she would get mad, I was always hanging around other girls whether they were my friends or hers, if they were girls she wanted to be around me too. I just thought she needed a lot of attention and I was willing to give it to her because I liked her. But if I know that things were going to end up the way they did, I would have steered clear of her. Link to post Share on other sites
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