"acceptance" stage

[alwayssme]

Realizing that it's over and he is out of my life.

For the past couple of months I have went through hell, even thought about getting professional help. But now I'm accepting that this was his choice and I have no control over the situation anymore. It still hurts but I know there is nothing I can do but to let him go. He knows I love him and if he wants to be my friend, he knows where to find me.

 

 

Today the weather is rainy again and rainy days remind me of him. Last time I saw him (we were broken up) but were by the fire at his house, cuddling and holding each other tight. It was beautiful, only later for him to tell me "I don't want to be with you anymore. Oh, that was two days ago. I don't know why I was kissing you. I'm still very attracted to you and care about you, but I don't want to be with you." Regardless how cold and hurtful he acted, it still hurts to know that that was the last time i'll be in that house, by that fire when it's raining, in his arms. But as long as I'm healthy I'll be fine. That's my new perspective. I haven't cried in a couple of days. Although it hurts, the "acceptance" stage is a step forward towards healing! Hopefully this will only make us stronger in the end. For me it was worse because I also lost close friends at the same time and had to rely on myself to pick up the pieces but that just comes to show us...life isn't always happiness and at the end of the day you only got yourself and God..Nobody else is guaranteed to be there!

[northstar1]

Realizing that it's over and he is out of my life.

For the past couple of months I have went through hell, even thought about getting professional help. But now I'm accepting that this was his choice and I have no control over the situation anymore. It still hurts but I know there is nothing I can do but to let him go. He knows I love him and if he wants to be my friend, he knows where to find me.

 

 

Today the weather is rainy again and rainy days remind me of him. Last time I saw him (we were broken up) but were by the fire at his house, cuddling and holding each other tight. It was beautiful, only later for him to tell me "I don't want to be with you anymore. Oh, that was two days ago. I don't know why I was kissing you. I'm still very attracted to you and care about you, but I don't want to be with you." Regardless how cold and hurtful he acted, it still hurts to know that that was the last time i'll be in that house, by that fire when it's raining, in his arms. But as long as I'm healthy I'll be fine. That's my new perspective. I haven't cried in a couple of days. Although it hurts, the "acceptance" stage is a step forward towards healing! Hopefully this will only make us stronger in the end. For me it was worse because I also lost close friends at the same time and had to rely on myself to pick up the pieces but that just comes to show us...life isn't always happiness and at the end of the day you only got yourself and God..Nobody else is guaranteed to be there!

 

Congrats on reaching a new stage , it's not easy but you are getting there.

[carhill]

Acceptance is an amazing thing

 

With it comes the realization that within you resides an eternal spring of happiness and love. No one can take that away from you....

[dreamy1945]

It is very true that you only have yourself and God...lost my best friend through all of this. Extra hard when you lose your partner too! Hang in there.

[MichiganMan222]

I got there when I saw she was seeing someone else. Still hurts, but almost gives you a sense of clarity which makes it easier to deal with the pain. No more urges to contact her and praying I DON'T bump into her in public rather than the other way around.

 

alwayssme, its cold here and I have my fireplace going. I wish you were here so we could comfort each other. Misery loves company.

[Just_dealin_with_it]

A funny thing happened to me just last night; on my way home from a halloween party I was jamming out to some of my favorite red hot chili pepper albums. While doing so, all of these thoughts of positivity and "acceptance" came over me about my recent breakup.

 

I thought to myself: "you are a good guy, you do have a good life ahead, and you have a lot offer someone new when they come in to your life". I also realized that I had a good time without her, saw some old friends I barely saw while dating her (for about 2 years), and I just thought to myself: "you really don't need her". There were a lot of things I feel like I had to put up with, and compromises I made to make her happy, yet it still wasn't enough. Now I do not have to make those compromises anymore, and I no longer have to consider her in any of my decisions. There is a lot of freedom in that. Instead of only remembering the good things that made me miss her, I am now thinking of all things that were not so great, and this is beginning to provide some relief to my heart and mind. For the first time I don't feel like I'm going to relapse into that lonely, depressed state I've been in the last couple of months. I do still miss her, and I do not know if we'll ever be friends again, but right now it doesn't matter because me feeling better is all I care about.

 

For those who are still depressed, just hang on. I think once you do accept things for the way they are, you won't feel like you're in a constant uphill battle. The funny thing is, although feeling good again takes time, it's kind of like a switch, once you flip it, the lights come on and everything gets brighter and brighter. I really think once you begin to feel better, you get better pretty quickly I wish everyone coping with a breakup the best. Stick to LC as long as you need to. Read inspirational books, watch funny movies, and make time to do things and hang with people that make you feel good... Soon we'll all be okay again!

[alwayssme]

I got there when I saw she was seeing someone else. Still hurts, but almost gives you a sense of clarity which makes it easier to deal with the pain. No more urges to contact her and praying I DON'T bump into her in public rather than the other way around.

 

alwayssme, its cold here and I have my fireplace going. I wish you were here so we could comfort each other. Misery loves company.

 

 

awwww definetely does. I'm so glad I found this website. It's nice to know that even though around you everyone is in relationships (in my case) there are still people out there going through what i'm going through!

[alwayssme]

it just hurts to know i'll never see him again or be able to touch him. but one thing i know is that i made it more than clear to him i loved him, i was sorry for things that had gone wrong and that i was willing to do everything and anything to make this work. HE decided to walk away. I have no unanswered question and I know I tried my hardest to get him back. So there is no other choice but to accept his decision! We'll be fine without our ex'es, just like they're fine without us!

[BikerBeagle]

The end of denial and the beginning of acceptance is always a good thing ...just stay guarded for bargaining, anger, and depression to jump you at an moment's notice.

[Just_dealin_with_it]

The end of denial and the beginning of acceptance is always a good thing ...just stay guarded for bargaining, anger, and depression to jump you at an moment's notice.

 

Yep... you never know, just when you think you're making progress, something happens, memories come back and boom you feel like you've taken some steps backwards Its sucks. Just gotta make it through day by day.