My ex tried again after 6 months but broke it off again

[dancingintherain12]

Back story:

- 2 year relationship

- we were each others first loves

-I'm 21 he's 26

- I have way more dating experience than him. Had my heart broken many times. He never got his heart broken or liked anyone enough.

-we became stagnant, grew apart, I lost feelings, we were fighting a lot

- I wanted to work on it, he didn't. I broke up with him because I knew he was going to break up with me.

 

First month I did 2 weeks nc and travelled. We met for closure.

The first month or two I didn't beg for him back. I made it known I wanted to work on things. But he said let's give it a few months and we can come back as friends. He wanted space. I wouldn't give it to him.

We had sex.

 

Longest NC I did was 3 weeks. This was in November. I texted him, he said he missed me and missed hanging out with me and felt a void.

He did not want to get back together. He said his feelings will always be there but they will never grow..

 

We had sex. Went back into nc for 2 weeks until I ran into him on the high way L

 

He texted me and I ignored for two days. Called and that began our 6 week mini relationship.

 

At first, I felt like he was taking advantage. I wrote him a letter saying I cannot be his friend. He took me out on a date that same day.

 

He was trying again. Texting me everyday, face timing, calling etc.

 

I forgot to mention he has a VERY busy work schedule and that's what lead us to grow apart.

 

Then, I wanted to spend New Years with him and he said he wanted to, too. Then a couple days later he said no, and that is a couples thing to do.

I started expecting a lot out of him and got emotional every so often. We continued going out on dates, but eventually towards the end he started to distance himself.

 

He called me. Broke it off over the phone. Said his feelings are a lot less strong than mine. That his heart isn't in it and he's not 100%.

 

He said his feelings are complicated. But he's too busy to have anything serious.

 

I left it alone. He texted me and called. I thought he changed his mind. We met and had sex.

 

He said I don't want to change my mind and I don't want to lose you out of my life. Please let's be friends. I said hell to the f no, and told him I'm not going to be his back up chick.

 

He told me he would be open to dating other girls and that really hurt me.

 

I feel like I'm not good enough for him anymore. The girl who he was once in love with isn't worth it anymore.

 

I have never gave him a full NC. Most we went without talking is 19 days. Wish I went straight into NC, I have a feeling if I did we would've been back together.

 

I don't want to hear to move on. Please, I know all the things I need to do, gym, focus on work, etc.

 

I'm merely here to just get any help. I feel really ****ty. I feel like he's always going to look back and think "well I gave it a chance, didn't work, and now I'm never going to consider it again"

 

I'm upset because he gave me his bare minimum. I kept saying if you're open to trying again, please be open about it. During the 6 weeks of us talking again everyday, he didn't tell me his intentions until he ended it with me. If he had just been honest, I wouldn't have been so emotional. He has always told me we aren't ever getting back together. He hurt me and I had my guard up and I wish he was open so we could work on things TOGETHER. Again, from his end, it was one sided. He never told me his feelings while we were in a relationship. I was always honest with him..

 

I read reconciliation stories. You go NC, and make him miss you. But it's been 6 months, he tried again, and now I feel like crap. Can anybody help me? Will he just find someone better than me and move on? Or is it a chance he will miss m and want me back?

[Whodatdog]

Back story:

- 2 year relationship

- we were each others first loves

-I'm 21 he's 26

- I have way more dating experience than him. Had my heart broken many times. He never got his heart broken or liked anyone enough.

-we became stagnant, grew apart, I lost feelings, we were fighting a lot

- I wanted to work on it, he didn't. I broke up with him because I knew he was going to break up with me.

 

First month I did 2 weeks nc and travelled. We met for closure.

The first month or two I didn't beg for him back. I made it known I wanted to work on things. But he said let's give it a few months and we can come back as friends. He wanted space. I wouldn't give it to him.

We had sex.

 

Longest NC I did was 3 weeks. This was in November. I texted him, he said he missed me and missed hanging out with me and felt a void.

He did not want to get back together. He said his feelings will always be there but they will never grow..

 

We had sex. Went back into nc for 2 weeks until I ran into him on the high way L

 

He texted me and I ignored for two days. Called and that began our 6 week mini relationship.

 

At first, I felt like he was taking advantage. I wrote him a letter saying I cannot be his friend. He took me out on a date that same day.

 

He was trying again. Texting me everyday, face timing, calling etc.

 

I forgot to mention he has a VERY busy work schedule and that's what lead us to grow apart.

 

Then, I wanted to spend New Years with him and he said he wanted to, too. Then a couple days later he said no, and that is a couples thing to do.

I started expecting a lot out of him and got emotional every so often. We continued going out on dates, but eventually towards the end he started to distance himself.

 

He called me. Broke it off over the phone. Said his feelings are a lot less strong than mine. That his heart isn't in it and he's not 100%.

He said his feelings are complicated. But he's too busy to have anything serious.

 

I left it alone. He texted me and called. I thought he changed his mind. We met and had sex.

 

He said I don't want to change my mind and I don't want to lose you out of my life. Please let's be friends. I said hell to the f no, and told him I'm not going to be his back up chick.

 

He told me he would be open to dating other girls and that really hurt me.

 

I feel like I'm not good enough for him anymore. The girl who he was once in love with isn't worth it anymore.

 

I have never gave him a full NC. Most we went without talking is 19 days. Wish I went straight into NC, I have a feeling if I did we would've been back together.

 

I don't want to hear to move on. Please, I know all the things I need to do, gym, focus on work, etc.

 

I'm merely here to just get any help. I feel really ****ty. I feel like he's always going to look back and think "well I gave it a chance, didn't work, and now I'm never going to consider it again"

 

I'm upset because he gave me his bare minimum. I kept saying if you're open to trying again, please be open about it. During the 6 weeks of us talking again everyday, he didn't tell me his intentions until he ended it with me. If he had just been honest, I wouldn't have been so emotional. He has always told me we aren't ever getting back together. He hurt me and I had my guard up and I wish he was open so we could work on things TOGETHER. Again, from his end, it was one sided. He never told me his feelings while we were in a relationship. I was always honest with him..

 

I read reconciliation stories. You go NC, and make him miss you. But it's been 6 months, he tried again, and now I feel like crap. Can anybody help me? Will he just find someone better than me and move on? Or is it a chance he will miss m and want me back?

 

Are you kidding? If he had been honest??? How many times did he have to tell you he wasnt interested in a relationship? Read what you wrote. He told you exactly how it was. You just didnt want to hear it. He wanted a FWB relationship, he shouted it from the mountains.

 

When people tell you who they are believe them!!

[Zahara]

He has always told me we aren't ever getting back together. He hurt me and I had my guard up and I wish he was open so we could work on things TOGETHER. Again, from his end, it was one sided. He never told me his feelings while we were in a relationship. I was always honest with him..

 

You hurt yourself too. The countless times he told you he didn't feel the same way you did. The countless times he bounced in and out of your life. You allowed yourself to get hurt. When you start taking responsibility for your own part in this and where you've put yourself, it'll be much easier to let go and come to terms with the ending.

 

I read reconciliation stories. You go NC, and make him miss you. But it's been 6 months, he tried again, and now I feel like crap. Can anybody help me? Will he just find someone better than me and move on? Or is it a chance he will miss m and want me back?

 

Yes, he will move on. And YOU will move on too.

 

He will likely miss the attention and the sex. Try to embrace the fact that he does not love and care for you the way you deserve and that should be what pushes you to move forward. Don't ever let him back into your life.

[dancingintherain12]

Are you kidding? If he had been honest??? How many times did he have to tell you he wasnt interested in a relationship? Read what you wrote. He told you exactly how it was. You just didnt want to hear it. He wanted a FWB relationship, he shouted it from the mountains.

 

When people tell you who they are believe them!!

 

He said those things from the beginning of the break up. He told me he said those things so he could push me away.

 

Yeah, if he was just being honest that he was trying again.

[Whodatdog]

Nowhere in any of these threads has he said "I love you and I want a committed relationship with you." No where. Because he doesnt.

 

Do yourself a favor, go no contact, and stop chasing this guy. He's never given you any indication that he wants you in his life the way you want him in yours.

[ExpatInItaly]

You don't have to move on, but that doesn't mean he won't. And then where will you be? Stuck in the same emotional turmoil while he is dating others.

 

This isn't a guy who wants a relationship with you anymore, OP. It's hard, I know. But he didn't sound very invested and certainly didn't want a relationship when you two started hanging out and sleeping together again. He has shown you through his actions and his words that it's over. You yourself said he's always told you that you're not ever getting back together - you need to start listening to that and believing that.

 

You will move on to someone better for you.

[clam]

He’s just not that into you.

 

Time to move along...