veryconfused1990 Posted October 14, 2017 Share Posted October 14, 2017 I am very confused. My bf and I have been living together in a same sex relationship for over 7 years, we studied together at college. Our relationship isn't perfect, but overall I thought it was really good. He brought up the breakup a few days ago, and continuously said he was confused, and that he loves me, and wants me in his life. I did not accept the breakup, and he said he might be open to other solutions to our issues, but thought breaking up is the only solution. He expressed he is wanting to explore options and hook up with others, since I was his first serious relationship and is becoming afraid of the commitment. The next days, I began to give him space but we talked about our feelings each day. It seems we talk more and more, and he's still saying that he loves me, we've hooked up a few times, he initiates cuddles, makes me breakfast, and says he is now open to additional solutions and not wanting to break up; one being giving us a break and hooking up with other people for a trial period. I don't know how I feel about this, and I think it might make our issues worse and I will be a backup. To me, it seems he is very confused. Does anyone have some suggestions, or inclinations as to if he actually wants to break up? Should I be open to us hooking up with others for a bit? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 14, 2017 Share Posted October 14, 2017 Sadly he has a version of GIGs. If you are all he knows, after 7 years he is afraid he's missing out. Eventually the lure of strange is going to become too overwhelming & he will no longer be able to resist. While he may come crawling back after time are you really going to want him back after he threw you & your love away & went gallivanting all over town. Some people don't know what they have until they lose it but by that time the damage is done. You can try telling him that but do not agree to a "break". Either you stay together or you break up for good & move on. Alas the choice is his not yours. You can try ramping up the romance & sex if you think that might persuade him. Link to post Share on other sites
Trust666 Posted October 15, 2017 Share Posted October 15, 2017 Sad as this is to say I agree, he has the GIGS. Let him go find out the grass is the same, I don;t think you can stop him. Unfortunately, they often come back, and from my experiences, in life it is never the same. My last ex and I took a 24 year break and in the end the damage was still there, and she left for GIGs. I had to burn all bridges as bad as it hurt to do so, once someone throws away what you have it's done. As said above, the damage is done. In good news you're young, if and when you break up you go full NC after you say what you need to and heal so you can move on. You should not be open to hooking up with others for a bit, in the end you'll never trust one another. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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