guild11 Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Hey guys, my GF of 2 years broke up with me a month ago, and since then I have hard time falling asleep. Every time my mind gets all kind thoughts of her and how amazing all the experience was, I get sad, I get angry and sometimes delusional. She is the first woman I fell in love with, and my first long term relationship. I never thought that I will experience such feelings. I'm having a hard time dealing with this. Since the break up I started doing things I never done before, signed to a gym, went out of town,something more, taking a bus to the work and leaving the car at home so I could walk home at the midnight and actually enjoy the hour long freedom of mind. I'm trying to keep myself strong but sometimes the feelings drag me to the bottom. I was feelings that I'm getting out and getting better, Until 2 days ago she said she already sees someone already, I felt kinda betrayed because I done so much for her and she already replaced me. And the worst part in this is that she works with me in the office, I see her 5 times a week. I feel trapped but at the same time I cannot afford losing my job. And motivational tips ? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Shaydon Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 Hey man i dont know how old you are but i dont think it matters really. Im in the same boat as you (gf of 2 years broke up with me a month ago) and i struggled to sleep at first. My advice is either tire yourself out by keep hitting the gym or what i do is listen to calm music as i sleep. Nothing crazy just soothing tones. Wish you the best in your recovery man. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 I have a trick for you to try. BEFORE you lay down to go to sleep, like maybe 30 minutes before, sit and deliberately run the situation through your mind thoroughly. Then ask yourself if there is anything you can do to help fix it or solve it. If yes, make that plan and carry it out. If not, realize that it is a big waste of time to worry about something you cannot change. So now you've already got this business out of the way for the night. Nothing new is going to change between now and when you go try to sleep. Leave a tv on or something real low if it helps. But if you don't wait until bedtime to deal with this stuff, then it shouldn't keep you up and if you've already deliberately hashed it out with yourself, then you shouldn't dream about it unless it's something in your subconscious you are not admitting to yourself which leaves your subconscious to work on it alone. I have always found this very helpful. Think about it, search for new resolution. Fix anything you can. Stop worrying about anything you can't fix. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Goodguy05 Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Hey guys, my GF of 2 years broke up with me a month ago, and since then I have hard time falling asleep. Every time my mind gets all kind thoughts of her and how amazing all the experience was, I get sad, I get angry and sometimes delusional. She is the first woman I fell in love with, and my first long term relationship. I never thought that I will experience such feelings. I'm having a hard time dealing with this. Since the break up I started doing things I never done before, signed to a gym, went out of town,something more, taking a bus to the work and leaving the car at home so I could walk home at the midnight and actually enjoy the hour long freedom of mind. I'm trying to keep myself strong but sometimes the feelings drag me to the bottom. I was feelings that I'm getting out and getting better, Until 2 days ago she said she already sees someone already, I felt kinda betrayed because I done so much for her and she already replaced me. And the worst part in this is that she works with me in the office, I see her 5 times a week. I feel trapped but at the same time I cannot afford losing my job. And motivational tips ? Hey dude read my thread I too am in a similar position I work wth my ex and she started seeing someone in the same office imagine that last 3 mths have been hell til he left the company and went overseas to live so I had a win read here http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/612481-dumped-work-together It gets a little easier the work thing it's been 9 mths wth mine but if I had a choice I'd leave so I don't see her anymore if ur in a position to leave i would suggest get another job. It's still hell I only last night I can here her making plans after work to go for drinks etc so if u can get out of there i would recommend it 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Seth0194 Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Sorry for your break up, No break ups are really good and one side always comes out on the hurt end. The gym is a great way to deal with those emotions you have going, will also make you healthier. As for sleeping, those are the worse times, at night we are left with the thoughts in our head, the good times we had, wondering what we could of done to not come to this point, wondering what your ex is doing or who she is with. Here are some tips or ideas. Read, start a new novel or find some good self help books. Pick up an new series on Netflix, video games, get a pet, clean the house/condo like a deep deep clean. Anything to not fall into that abyss that is sadness. It is easier sad then done. As for work, try to limit the contact as much as possible, do not be there to listen about what she has going on, if she starts to tell you something not work related, inform her you want it to be business only. This makes for a hard healing process but use these forums and know if your relationship with the wrong women was that good, imagine what it will be like with the right women. Best of luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CantEversay Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 I'm kind of in the same situation, I can't sleep solidly anymore. I don't want to lie down in bed because it's so depressing so I'll get up after a few hours feeling like ****. It sucks that it also kind of interferes with my gym work out after I also just started going to the gym to try and improve myself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 24, 2017 Share Posted June 24, 2017 Also, if all else fails, take two Benadryl. Pillcosby yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author guild11 Posted June 25, 2017 Author Share Posted June 25, 2017 Update - we talked at work about random stuff but not about us, at some point she asked what day it is and took out anti pregnancy pills... and drunk one, I didn't say nothing. Later on she said she is doing some kind of cosmetic treatments. Maybe I'm overreacting but why the hell she would take her pills in front of me ? She used them only once when we were together, what is she trying to do ? Show me that she already sexually active with the new guy? It got it really bad yet again, being played so much. Link to post Share on other sites
Seth0194 Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 That's why its called No CONTACT. Keep it to as little as possible, stop giving her power over you. Keep work about work. I am going through a break up myself, I don't talk unless I have too. I am not an emotional wreck, its prying on me but I am good. But I limit any contact with her I can, until you can face the fact she is with someone else and its over. If you can smile when you hear that, then you might be ready to talk to her. NO CONTACT.... free advise. Link to post Share on other sites
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