What's the Deal?

[CTMoz]

I've written in detail, about my breakup and mess here before. I'll link to it if anyone is interested, but really, it's not too important to my question.

 

I've been out of the woods for a few days, really apathetic and indifferent to her and what she is doing. It was like a flip just switched a few days ago, and I quit caring.

 

Anyways, she has told multiple friends, family, and people around here that she is "done" she's "over it" she's "over me" and that she "feels nothing"

 

We have had no contact with another, a few friends mention things that is said occasionally. We used a mutual friend to return property and what not. Mainly, where most of the information has come from. Anyways, I have her blocked on all social media and all platforms. Last week, my friend texted me and said she was trashing me on social media. Twitter. Okay. No big deal. Anyways, curiosity got me, and I asked what she said. I was sent a snap shot of her posts, and she was dogging me, but she was also making reference to things I have been doing and things I've posted on my own account. So I know she's checking on me, probably through a fake account.

 

Anyways, today, I ran into her at the grocery store. I never looked her way or even acknowledged her. A few minutes later she showed up at the town park where I was having my school reunion. Mind you, it's not a big place, and most everyone knew we were gathering there. She was having a picnic it looked like with her son. Which, honestly, didn't seem like a big deal. Albeit, a little out of place for her at 10 in the morning.

 

My buddy text me about an hour into this event and asked if I was at the park. I replied I was and asked why. And he sent me a screen of more tweets. One saying "Of course when I try to enjoy the day at the park with my son, the last person I want to see is here. lmao" and a few others referencing song lyrics of how she wished she had never met me or gave me anything.

 

So my question, if it bothered her so bad to be there, why not leave? Why sit there for two hours just across the road? Why tweet about it while you're sitting there? If she is so over everything, why are the shots still coming?

 

I'm not too petty of a person, but these are starting to bother me. They've been going on for weeks. I've asked my buddy to not keep me updated, but he doesn't seem to be able to help himself. He thinks he's doing the right thing, I know, but I don't really care what she's doing. If she's moving on, like she says, I wish she would just do so.

 

So, I'm going to assume, she isn't handling it as well as she claims she is. But why all the anger and bitterness and pettiness? She dumped me after all.

[bluefeather]

But why all the anger and bitterness and pettiness?

 

Because she's angry, bitter, and petty. And it sounds like the person you call your friend is getting off on the drama.

[Goodguy05]

I've written in detail, about my breakup and mess here before. I'll link to it if anyone is interested, but really, it's not too important to my question.

 

I've been out of the woods for a few days, really apathetic and indifferent to her and what she is doing. It was like a flip just switched a few days ago, and I quit caring.

 

Anyways, she has told multiple friends, family, and people around here that she is "done" she's "over it" she's "over me" and that she "feels nothing"

 

We have had no contact with another, a few friends mention things that is said occasionally. We used a mutual friend to return property and what not. Mainly, where most of the information has come from. Anyways, I have her blocked on all social media and all platforms. Last week, my friend texted me and said she was trashing me on social media. Twitter. Okay. No big deal. Anyways, curiosity got me, and I asked what she said. I was sent a snap shot of her posts, and she was dogging me, but she was also making reference to things I have been doing and things I've posted on my own account. So I know she's checking on me, probably through a fake account.

 

Anyways, today, I ran into her at the grocery store. I never looked her way or even acknowledged her. A few minutes later she showed up at the town park where I was having my school reunion. Mind you, it's not a big place, and most everyone knew we were gathering there. She was having a picnic it looked like with her son. Which, honestly, didn't seem like a big deal. Albeit, a little out of place for her at 10 in the morning.

 

My buddy text me about an hour into this event and asked if I was at the park. I replied I was and asked why. And he sent me a screen of more tweets. One saying "Of course when I try to enjoy the day at the park with my son, the last person I want to see is here. lmao" and a few others referencing song lyrics of how she wished she had never met me or gave me anything.

 

So my question, if it bothered her so bad to be there, why not leave? Why sit there for two hours just across the road? Why tweet about it while you're sitting there? If she is so over everything, why are the shots still coming?

 

I'm not too petty of a person, but these are starting to bother me. They've been going on for weeks. I've asked my buddy to not keep me updated, but he doesn't seem to be able to help himself. He thinks he's doing the right thing, I know, but I don't really care what she's doing. If she's moving on, like she says, I wish she would just do so.

 

So, I'm going to assume, she isn't handling it as well as she claims she is. But why all the anger and bitterness and pettiness? She dumped me after all.

 

Where there's underlying anger such as in her case, she's not over it she's angry

My ex did the same thing g intentionally tried to hurt me lol. Where there's anger there's feelings. Im not certain wat her feelings are. As for ur friend lol yes I had a friend like this where I literally had to drum it in to his dumb head that I didn't wanna know. I'd say ur friend can't contain himself or help himself. Ur on the right path just ignore eventually they get the message and stop. Things will turn around too for u because ur the mature one.

Read my thread to get a better understanding things are turning around . Give it time ull see ull come out on top.

As hard as it was for me not to spit the dummy and fight back and do wat my ex was doing i kept quiet and kept a low profile. I learn last week her new bf has left our company (yes we all work together it's been hell) and i learn he is going overseas to London to live. A win for me lol u see things always change stay cool know her anger is an underlying current of unresolved feelings towards u (really a secret win in my books ) keep healing keep quiet stay strong no matter how much she tries to get a reaction out of u stay poker faced ignore ignore ignore u will come out triumph trust me

Edited June 4, 2017 by Goodguy05

[CTMoz]

There is a sense of satisfaction in the fact that she's angry. But it's misguided for me personally. I don't want her to hurt, or be angry. I want her to get over it, like she has claimed she has. I want her to live a happy, healthy, and normal life. I don't want her to hold onto all this unresolved aggression. She has left me twice now. I will not go back to the chaos that is her mental state. I will not tolerate the skewed perception she has. I do love her, even still. But I know that it will only render more heartache. So even if she were to reach out to me, someway, I would not take the notion. I've been out of the woods, as far as reconciliation goes. She has a son, that I love dearly, and I want him to have a full life. And I'm willing to step aside for him to have it, since, it obviously wasn't meant for me.

 

Now, you're all quite versed in these situations, I see. Let me ask, was this a freak coincidence, or are the wheels in motion for her to start creeping back in? If so, I just want to better prepare myself for that.

[bluefeather]

was this a freak coincidence, or are the wheels in motion for her to start creeping back in? If so, I just want to better prepare myself for that.

 

I'd say it's 50/50. When someone is emotionally unstable (her performing a smear campaign on you shows that to me), anything could trigger her to go one way or the other.

 

...

 

I just read your first thread. That seems more emotionally unstable than I thought. I'm sorry you went through that. I'm also sorry that your daughter did. I would prepare for any possibility using two thoughts:

 

1. Stop caring if there is or isn't a chance she may start creeping in. Because the answer should always be no. She divorced you once, and then broke up with you again after that. That's more than enough to know that she is a runner. She'll do it again if given the chance.

 

2. She not only left you, but she left your daughter too. Your daughter may develop something from this. Think about it: A motherly figure abandoned her twice. She may be young, but her subconscious can pick up on this and hold onto it. Feelings of abandonment at a young age can cause lasting damage to many things. I say that from experience. I would suggest that you keep that in mind, and try to do what you can to make sure your daughter knows that she has all of your love and is completely worthy of it.

 

I mention thought 2 as a method of preparing because all of that regarding your daughter was caused largely by this woman. Potential harm to my child would completely turn me away from any idea of reconciliation.