Murmillo Posted December 16, 2016 Share Posted December 16, 2016 Hi all, It is often told that during break ups your intuition is your worse enemy when it comes to getting your ex back or healing. Did you guys ever do anything against the consensus of what not to do and decide to go with your gut, and getting a positive outcome? For example, writing a letter, initiating contact as a dumpee or whatever. I understand that right after the breakup when emotions are all over the place the safest way to go is to just stick with the advice but what if you are no longer in that needy, desperate place where you cannot make ANY decisions for yourself? 1) What did you do and how long after the break up? 2) What did you hope to achieve? 3) what did you achieve? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Nowty V Posted December 16, 2016 Share Posted December 16, 2016 1) What did you do and how long after the break up? I responded to her text, 7 months after the breakup. She said she was free from the drug she had been addicted too. We met up. 2) What did you hope to achieve? What I'd hoped to achieve for the 4 years of the relationship. A life partner, a friend to face the world with, a lover, someone to share with. 3) what did you achieve? I wound up feeling worse, crucified. She was still hopelessly addicted. I called her house phone, her Father answered and went through a list of Names of men she had presumably been involved with, "Is that you Jim/Jack/Harry/Bert?" A sad situation, the Cocaine must have fried her mind. Why would she say a whole heap of stuff that obviously wasn't true, what would she be hoping to achieve? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted December 16, 2016 Share Posted December 16, 2016 My going against the consensus was relate to healing. I was two months separated from my first husband when I met a great new guy. I broke every rule in the book and rushed into a new relationship with him. We will be celebrating 25 years together next year. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Kelley Posted December 16, 2016 Share Posted December 16, 2016 I knew in my heart that I could never forgive him and I went NC for my own healing. You have to consider if you get in touch will you be OK handling rejection? Will that hurt less than you not reaching out? Everyone will have their own opinions and experiences, sometimes you just have to learn the hard way or not in some cases. I don't know the reasons etc for the break up, but I do know unless the dumper is banging on your door wanting you back, and doing anything to make it work, they have moved on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted December 16, 2016 Share Posted December 16, 2016 Make sure that you can tell the difference between your intuition and other inner forces. Take care. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Murmillo Posted December 17, 2016 Author Share Posted December 17, 2016 Make sure that you can tell the difference between your intuition and other inner forces. Take care. Could you elaborate? Link to post Share on other sites
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