HumanMachine Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 Is the hardest right? Damn it never gets any easier Link to post Share on other sites
IfonlyIknew Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 Oh YES.. I've had my fair share of NC but I always seem to have the same outcome.. by the time it's over with I stop caring, and then they always come back and I could not care less! Hang in there as it does get easier. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 Is the hardest right? Damn it never gets any easier Not necessarily ....or at least it depends a lot on the nature of the NC. I remember weeks 2, 5, 7, 8, 9, 14, 36, 94, 95, and 117 being pretty bad too. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Kelley Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 It's week 3 for me it's tough as he was my best friend and we talked about everything (well almost!). What keeps me going is that he is with her now. He tried to reach out but I shut him down. It's not easy but you know what there is peace in the silence, and it's supposed to get easier eventually! Link to post Share on other sites
Author HumanMachine Posted October 20, 2016 Author Share Posted October 20, 2016 It's week 3 for me it's tough as he was my best friend and we talked about everything (well almost!). What keeps me going is that he is with her now. He tried to reach out but I shut him down. It's not easy but you know what there is peace in the silence, and it's supposed to get easier eventually! fortunately i have no desire to contact - like yours they have moved on. I miss their company more than anything 1 Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 My pride and self esteem kicked in thank goodness when my last ex ended us. I knew the R/S was crap yet it still hurt. My mind went to "you don't want me in your life, you got it". Was it easy, nope. However, it like breaking a habit. The first week is toughest. By one month NC, I was feeling much better. By 6 months, I could have seen her in a bar making out with another guy and could of cared less. The NC also helped me get over it as when she did come back at 5-6 months post breakup for another chance, she was told Um, no.. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author HumanMachine Posted October 20, 2016 Author Share Posted October 20, 2016 My pride and self esteem kicked in thank goodness when my last ex ended us. I knew the R/S was crap yet it still hurt. My mind went to "you don't want me in your life, you got it". Was it easy, nope. However, it like breaking a habit. The first week is toughest. By one month NC, I was feeling much better. By 6 months, I could have seen her in a bar making out with another guy and could of cared less. The NC also helped me get over it as when she did come back at 5-6 months post breakup for another chance, she was told Um, no.. Yep, gladly i've felt the relief of finally letting go, and being able to accept that they're gone forever. I've got that to aim for. If i break nc it will be the biggest mistake of my life. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Frozensushi Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 The first week is rough. It was such a shock to the system I didn't even begin to process my feelings. I'm over 2 months NC now and today I was missing my Ex like crazy. Forgive all the hurt, pain and mind screwing she put me through. At that moment I'd go through it all again just to hold her in my arms one last time. A few days ago my Ex popped in my head and was like, "I hope she and her new guy are enjoying each other". I was feeling totally indifferent about her. I was doing well and things were going okay. Today I feel like I'm back at square one. It's been pretty random. Just hang in there. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 The first week is rough. It was such a shock to the system I didn't even begin to process my feelings. I'm over 2 months NC now and today I was missing my Ex like crazy. Forgive all the hurt, pain and mind screwing she put me through. At that moment I'd go through it all again just to hold her in my arms one last time. A few days ago my Ex popped in my head and was like, "I hope she and her new guy are enjoying each other". I was feeling totally indifferent about her. I was doing well and things were going okay. Today I feel like I'm back at square one. It's been pretty random. Just hang in there. Two months? Nice job! You're next step is to get your butt out there and start dating. As soon as you meet someone you REALLY like, it will put the final nail in the coffin of you thinking about that crazy ex. Edit-- just be advised that finding that "lady on the street and the freak in the bed" isn't as easy, unless you get REALLY lucky and find another BPD woman! LMBO!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author HumanMachine Posted October 20, 2016 Author Share Posted October 20, 2016 The first week is rough. It was such a shock to the system I didn't even begin to process my feelings. I'm over 2 months NC now and today I was missing my Ex like crazy. Forgive all the hurt, pain and mind screwing she put me through. At that moment I'd go through it all again just to hold her in my arms one last time. A few days ago my Ex popped in my head and was like, "I hope she and her new guy are enjoying each other". I was feeling totally indifferent about her. I was doing well and things were going okay. Today I feel like I'm back at square one. It's been pretty random. Just hang in there. Thanks man i'm glad you're getting there I'm in a weird place.. I don't care that she's replaced me, and i hope that she's happy but i miss her presence, her laugh and our random talks. Link to post Share on other sites
Frozensushi Posted October 20, 2016 Share Posted October 20, 2016 I'm in a weird place.. I don't care that she's replaced me, and i hope that she's happy but i miss her presence, her laugh and our random talks. You had an emotional bond with her. The breakup is a tearing of that bond. So, of course, you miss her presence, her laugh and all those little things she did. I miss all my Ex's idiosyncracies from her unusual style of dressing to her special organic toothpaste. You are a lot stronger than I was. When I found out my Ex had already found my replacement, I was devastated. I've been swirling through all the breakup stages over and over. We just gotta keep the NC intact and detach! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
newheart Posted October 21, 2016 Share Posted October 21, 2016 I wish it would get easier already ... I am still having trouble sleeping, and when I do sleep, I frequently have dreams about him where everything is normal. Then I wake up, and it is like reliving the breakup all over again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HumanMachine Posted October 22, 2016 Author Share Posted October 22, 2016 She broke nc I now start right back at the beginning of the extremely tough first week of nc Great Link to post Share on other sites
PrincessWarrior1 Posted October 22, 2016 Share Posted October 22, 2016 (edited) I wish it would get easier already ... I am still having trouble sleeping, and when I do sleep, I frequently have dreams about him where everything is normal. Then I wake up, and it is like reliving the breakup all over again. I know how you feel. You need to be extra kind to yourself the first week when you are hurting. If you need to take some benadryl (helps with sleep) and maybe even an ibuprofen or Tylenol PM to help you sleep during this painful time it can help a great deal. I read that our bodies are going through similar reactions of physical pain during a break up. After two weeks it gets a little better and then better from there. Take relaxing baths and showers too. Anything you can to feel better. NC is really important in healing. Any breaks in it will set you back especially if they reject you or are mean. Plus you will be upset with yourself too. If one thing I can count is that I did not initiate contact. The focus really needs to get off them and back to you for healing and self esteem reasons, etc. You have to relearn how to be happy without them. Edited October 22, 2016 by PrincessWarrior1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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