dealing with her insecurity

[gbe2015]

I was dating someone for about 4 months. For the most part the relationship was great, we clicked instantly and enjoyed being with each other. But as time went on I started to notice mood swings which usually resulted in a break up (she would always reject me) . When I talked to her about it she told me she had issues about feeling insecure and her first response was to block everyone out hence the break up. Sometimes only an hour would pass and she'd be back to telling me how much she wanted to be with me, sometimes a day. Each time I went back trying to focus of the good parts of us thinking we could work through her insecurity.

 

One weekend she does it to me again. It was the 2nd time that week she did that to me. I'd had enough and this time didn't go back. I told her I was done going through this repeatedly. This time the breakup sticks.

 

Fast forward a month and I'm still done with it. I look back now and wonder why I even put up with that behavor. But she still contacts me, she wants to see me and talk, telling me she needs closure, that she has been seeing a professional that is helping her work though her issues. I'm not sure what we could talk about but part of me feels maybe she is being truthful and I should let her say her piece so she can move on, the other part of me thinks she will manipulate me into trying again.

 

Should I meet with her?

[ExpatInItaly]

I was dating someone for about 4 months. For the most part the relationship was great, we clicked instantly and enjoyed being with each other. But as time went on I started to notice mood swings which usually resulted in a break up (she would always reject me) . When I talked to her about it she told me she had issues about feeling insecure and her first response was to block everyone out hence the break up. Sometimes only an hour would pass and she'd be back to telling me how much she wanted to be with me, sometimes a day. Each time I went back trying to focus of the good parts of us thinking we could work through her insecurity.

 

One weekend she does it to me again. It was the 2nd time that week she did that to me. I'd had enough and this time didn't go back. I told her I was done going through this repeatedly. This time the breakup sticks.

 

Fast forward a month and I'm still done with it. I look back now and wonder why I even put up with that behavor. But she still contacts me, she wants to see me and talk, telling me she needs closure, that she has been seeing a professional that is helping her work though her issues. I'm not sure what we could talk about but part of me feels maybe she is being truthful and I should let her say her piece so she can move on, the other part of me thinks she will manipulate me into trying again.

 

Should I meet with her?

 

And what about your wants and needs throughout the relationship? This was and remains all about her. Not good. It is not your responsibility to help her move on from a break-up she initiated.

 

I would therefore strongly advise you against meeting her. Time to look out for Number 1, which is you.

[mightycpa]

Some guys really like girls that are ****ing cuckoo. So, really, the big question is whether that is you or not.

 

If not, don't be afraid to just end it. You don't have to be tolerant of that, nor accommodating. It is not your problem to solve, and the consequences are not yours to bear.

[wheream_i]

Nobody needs that drama in their life.