Can't understand my feelings

[KB_138]

Hi everyone,

So I just passed the 1 year mark post breakup and I'm doing pretty well for the most part. I'm getting out with friends and family, planned a few trips/events for the summer, all in all I'm looking forward to my summer. My ex girlfriend and I aren't what I would call friends but we are civil. I see her from time to time through gatherings with mutual friends and we are able to hold a conversation with smiles (not forced). I recently learned that she is seeing someone. Someone I know and to be honest he's a pretty cool dude. She's been friends with him since childhood so I understand the chemistry there. When I first found out I had the traditional gut wrench that we all know too well but then it subsided and I for some reason felt a bit better. I'm happy knowing she's with someone who won't treat her badly but every now and then I do a complete 180 and I'm in the pits. One day I'm happy for her, the next I'm sad. I went on a few dates with a very sweet/pretty girl that I had met through sports. Although she decided to end it as she felt there wasn't any chemistry and I can say I agree with her. It just wasn't there. But that's OK, no offense was taken as I understand her reasons. I guess I'm just wondering why my feelings keep changing. Anyone else had this happen? If so I'd love to hear your stories and how you progressed.

 

Thanks for your time everyone!

[GA000 Jenny]

I don't change my mind that easily. Once it's over, it's over.

But then, I'm a woman.

[casey.lives]

feelings are complex things.. the real reasons for them are deeper and harder to look at, and even harder to admit to.

[Strength in Healing]

I don't change my mind that easily. Once it's over, it's over.

But then, I'm a woman.

 

 

 

Aren't women the last ones to make up their minds and stick with decisions? Haha Couldn't resist.

 

Anyways, to the TC. I feel you. Very odd feeling to find yourself afflicted with. Personally I would cut off the mutual friends, never speak to her or them again, and move on without looking back.

[KB_138]

I don't think cutting off my friends is the answer here. They've been some of my best friends for over ten years. I introduced her to them. They are not the reason for the way I'm feeling. Regardless, whether I see her or not I just feel happy for her but that happiness changes at times. Most likely because I still miss her. I guess I should rephrase my original question and just ask is there anyone that has dealt this way before and did it change over time?

[aloneinaz]

I don't think cutting off my friends is the answer here. They've been some of my best friends for over ten years. I introduced her to them. They are not the reason for the way I'm feeling. Regardless, whether I see her or not I just feel happy for her but that happiness changes at times. Most likely because I still miss her. I guess I should rephrase my original question and just ask is there anyone that has dealt this way before and did it change over time?

 

Why your feeling this way is you haven't met anyone else to replace her in your life. She has. As soon as you meet someone that digs you and you dig her, your ex will be a distant memory.

 

You sound young. This is normal after your first or second relationship. I've read over and over that you never get over your last relationship completely until your knee deep in your next.

[KB_138]

That makes sense for sure. I'm not too young at 28 years old but it is my second relationship. I know once I get on with a new relationship it will become merely a memory. Thanks for the input, I appreciate it.