Need ideas . Sorry about the long read.

[tagram129]

Ok guys. I'm not one to generally ask anyone for advice but I just don't know what to do. I've been reading some of the posts on here, and respect how helpful everyone has been, so I decided to try my own luck. I'll start at the beginning. I broke up with my ex of 4 years at the beginning of October. We had been drifting apart for the better part of 6 months and just a bunch of other little things tore us apart. She, however, is not who this is about. I didn't have to much trouble moving on since we had been drifting apart for so long. I met a girl at my school that we will call Alex. She had gotten out of an abusive relationship a little while ago. We started talking more and found out that we had a ton in common. We started hanging out at school when we weren't in class and on weekends. (It's a small campus.) I ended up asking her to our homecoming. She said yes.

 

We were very attracted to each other and it was fairly obvious to everyone who knew either of us. My friends even told me that they hadn't seen me this happy in quite awhile. There were times where we would just sit outside at night talking until 5 in the morning. It was honestly perfect. She accepted me for who I was and she made me incredibly happy. One night she asked me to come over to her room, so I did. At first, it was nothing out of the ordinary. We got some homework done, goofed off like normal, just had fun. We were on her bed and she cuddled up on me. We got to talking about being intimate(I don't remember what led there), and she asked me about sex. I asked her what she meant, and she said that even though we weren't together, she kind of wanted it. She didn't think it would ruin anything, and that it would be great. I'm not going to lie, I wanted her more than anything. I gave in. This kept up for a few weeks. We went to homecoming and it was amazing. I spent the night in her room with her at her request and we went to the mall the next day. When we came back is where the trouble begins.

 

When we got back, I asked her what she wanted to do. She suggested a movie, which I was perfectly fine with. She got a text from her friend saying that she was ready(she read it in front of me, I didn't take her phone or anything). She said that she needed to go see a different friend about ordering something from that friends mom. I was kind of confused but told her ok and to let me know when she was done. She told me I should look up a movie in the meantime, so I did. About 20 minutes later, I got a text from her saying that she ran into the friend that had texted her by chance, and they decided to go get tattoos. I felt a little odd at this point, but said ok and to let me know when they got back. I got another text about an hour later saying they were back and asked her if she wanted to watch the movie or just take the night off, etc. 30 minutes later, I got a text from her saying that her and her one friend got into a fight about something stupid, so her and the friend that she got tattoos with were going to a party house. I was a bit worried because she doesn't exactly drink and she is only 19. (I'm 23, 22 at the time.) While she was there, she texted me that she needed me to stay in her room because they were basically pouring alcohol down her throat. When they got back, I basically carried her back to her room. Her friends took her into their room instead, because they said that I was incapable of taking care of her, meanwhile they were trying to give her more alcohol yet. I was making her bed for her and heard her ask if I was still in her room.

 

Her friends told her no, that I had left, and I heard her say that I was an anyway and she didn't need me. After that, her friends pretty much escorted me out of the building. When I got back to my room, I got a facebook message from her screaming at me for leaving. I told her that I didn't and that I had heard what she said. She told me that I only heard what I wanted to, and that her friends took her phone and ipod so she couldn't message me. They thought her laptop was dead so they didn't take it. I went back over to take care of her for the night. The next morning when she went to breakfast I told her I was going to go back to my room to sleep since I had stayed up all night taking care of her. She said ok. When she came back after breakfast, I got a text saying that she guessed she would just talk to me later. She then pretty much ignored me all day. That night she finally agreed to talk to me. I explained how I kind of felt ditched and hurt by her friends for the situation they put me in. She told me I shouldn't feel ditched because we never made definite plans. She then went on to tell me how it was the best night she had in a long time and she didn't regret it at all. She also told me how all of the guys were trying to dance on her because she was the hot girl that works at the food place on campus. (She later claimed that was to prove to me she could take care of herself)

 

I put my feelings about that night aside because I wanted to move on. Things went back to normal and I was happy. Wednesday night, she told me she was going to go to bed early, so she wouldn't be answering her phone. I was fine with it because I had an 8:30 class anyway. It turns out that she ended up staying up the entire night with friends. When I was asked by a friend in class if I was talking to her, I said no because she had stayed up all night and I thought she was still sleeping. Her friends apparently took that wrong and told her I was complaining about her in class. I got a few nasty messages from her. I tried to convince her to come see me and the friends I had been talking to and they could tell her exactly what I said but she wouldn't. She then told me that things were moving to fast for her and it needed to stop. She didn't talk to me until Friday after class. I showed up to her door and asked if she would talk. We talked and agreed that we should message more over Thanksgiving break. I ended up getting about 4 messages total from her over break. She's the type of girl that has her phone in her hands 24/7 and is always answering as soon as she gets a message. I completely understand being with family on break, but I felt like I was more being ignored at that time. When we came back, she told me that we couldn't be anything more than friends and I needed to stop trying now.

 

I let her go for December. She didn't want to talk to me so I gave her space and thought it was for the best. I messaged her a few days into January telling her that I still really cared and that I wanted to try to talk about everything. She said that while she was sorry for ignoring me and not messaging me over christmas, she wasn't sorry for anything else. She told me I was to selfish and negative and that I put to much stress on her. A few days later, she started dating her boss at work. When I was "with" her, she would always complain to me about how he would creep her out and hit on her and everything. (A friend thinks that was just to throw me off track). Anyway, someone wrote a letter to management about their relationship, since it's not allowed and they would put it on display while at work. She's blaming me for it, even though I didn't write it. I even asked my friends and none of them wrote it either. Now she absolutely hates me. I had to eat where she was working the other night. I had a night class and it was the only place open when I was done. They were both there and made sure I saw them together. She was the only cashier so I had to go through her line. Afterwords she was telling our mutual friends that I only went to jealously stare at them.

 

I'm not normally one to hang on after everything happens, but I just don't know what to do. I really still care about her after everything. My self-esteem and confidence is honestly gone at the moment, and my friends are just tired of hearing about the situation so I don't talk to them about it. I just don't understand any of it. Was I just used? Was I a rebound? Am i right to be upset? How in the world do you go about moving on from this? I highly appreciate any insight or advice you guys may have. If you need any more details about anything or have any questions that could help, please ask and I will answer ASAP. Thanks in advance.

[Farid]

Dude if you get attached to a girl who clearly doesn't give a dirty sock about you, you have more issues than this girl.

Why on earth would you wanna be with someone who dates her boss right after you.

No you were not used, you may not be a rebound. In campus these things happen. People have casual sex and dates. It may be unfortunate but this is how some young girls discover themselves.

You are obviously a more emotional and easily attached person.

The question you need to ask yourself is: Is this the right type of girl for you.

 

You are young! And you are in an environment with dozens, if not hundreds of options. Make use of it. You are in the spring of your life. Get you ass out there, see the sun shining and get yourself a date!

Adios amigos.

[Hija77]

She has issues. I'm not blaming her, being abused isn't her fault, but it will mess your mind up. Cut it off. She's being cruel, and you're allowing it. You have every right to be upset, but please don't make it worse on yourself. First and foremost, go NC. Don't initiate or answer any texts/calls/emails she sends. Don't go to where she works. Let her do her thing with that other guy. She's his problem now, and you should count yourself lucky. You''re young!!! Learn from this situation!!! Move on with your life and be happy!!!

[marcelo.santos]

Move on!

 

Don't get involved so fast next time - take some weeks to learn if the girl is right for you first.

[AlexfromBoston]

Buddy, delete her number and tell her to f*ck off. I usually suggest being polite; however, this is one of those scenarios where a chick needs to be told off. If you run into her, don't completely ignore her but act confident and carefree. Basically act like she never meant sh*t to you. If you completely ignore her or avoid eye contact, it'll seem too contrived and make you look weak. I would never get too wrapped up with a chick while in college anyways. There are so many options, why bother with this one floozy.

[tagram129]

My work here is done. The guy I was pretending to be caused my friend to lose her job because he told on her for dating her manager. Since he is talking to his ex, I decided to post this up in a couple places to make it seem like he didn't care about her. I heard that this morning she saw my post on Reddit and flipped on him, so my job is done. I'll delete this later tonight and be good to go.