amore77 Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 My bf and I had a huge fight last night and broke up. I know I have to stay in NC but I love him so much my heart is about to die of pain. I thought we were going to stay together forever. And now all is lost. I love him so much but after last night I have to let go. Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 We are here for you in this time of stress and pain. Start by telling us what happened and perhaps we may have some advice. Link to post Share on other sites
Author amore77 Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 We had had fights in the past and we both had a little too much to drink. I asked him please to eat something because he was acting drunk. Then he started giving me a mean attitude and I called him on it. I asked him if he believe he had any saying on how things went. he proceed to call the cops on me. They came and went. He told me sit here and we will talk. I said no i am done talking. I dont trust you and never will trust you. We fought some more and finally went to sleep. I know is over and i will never forgive him but it hurts a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted November 28, 2014 Share Posted November 28, 2014 How did the fight start? How long were you two together? What are your ages etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Author amore77 Posted November 28, 2014 Author Share Posted November 28, 2014 How did the fight start? How long were you two together? What are your ages etc. There was no fight. Not over anything in particular. It was just me telling him to eat and stop being mean. I am 36 he is 45. We were together almost a year. I just texted him I need my property back and he said I love you please come back home. But he called the police on me. How can you trust someone who does that? I was not even close to him physically. I would never hurt him. He texted me that he would bring stuff home. I said no. I cant be arrested or I will loose my job. Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted November 29, 2014 Share Posted November 29, 2014 It sounds like a stupid drunken fight. Why not ask him for some time to chill out and think? Link to post Share on other sites
Author amore77 Posted November 29, 2014 Author Share Posted November 29, 2014 I am going to Pick up my chargers (ipad and such) from him. He said he wants to talk. I think we need some time apart Link to post Share on other sites
Author amore77 Posted December 1, 2014 Author Share Posted December 1, 2014 I wanted to update what happened here after we meet, we had a few discussions over the days, I told him I will not be abused or manipulated and as far as I am concerned there was no reason to call the cops. (He did not lie to them just told them we were verbally arguing). I told him I do not know if I can have a relationship with someone I cant trust. We talked things over these days and I asked him to be sober (no alcohol) for 30 days. He agreed to it. If things get better then we have to make a choice not to drink anymore or at least I do not want him drinking when he is with me. Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted December 1, 2014 Share Posted December 1, 2014 Why did he call the police? Was it warranted? I called the police on my ex-wife, but it was because she assaulted me with a wooden plank and left me bruised. Whaf does he CLAIM you did? I'm not saying you did anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted December 1, 2014 Share Posted December 1, 2014 I wanted to update what happened here after we meet, we had a few discussions over the days, I told him I will not be abused or manipulated and as far as I am concerned there was no reason to call the cops. (He did not lie to them just told them we were verbally arguing). I think you're magnifying this for no reason. BOTH of you were drunk and during the fight it escalated and he went one step further by calling the police. Maybe it was a good thing because that probably calmed things down. There's 3 sides to a story. I can't imagine those few exchanges led him to call the cops. I told him I do not know if I can have a relationship with someone I cant trust. Huh? If he called the cops for no reason, sure. You both were drunk and fighting. When people are drunk they do and act stupidly. We talked things over these days and I asked him to be sober (no alcohol) for 30 days. He agreed to it. You were drunk too. Maybe you should place a 30 day ban on yourself as well. If things get better then we have to make a choice not to drink anymore or at least I do not want him drinking when he is with me. How about you both stay away from the alcohol. Link to post Share on other sites
Author amore77 Posted December 1, 2014 Author Share Posted December 1, 2014 The ban on alcohol applies to me to. I can guarantee you, there was no threats of violence no yelling, nothing. Even he agrees he remembers very little of that night (like he does not remembers having dinner but we did) and he does not even remember why he called the cops. I did nothing that warranted something like that. We both agree on that. Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted December 1, 2014 Share Posted December 1, 2014 (edited) The ban on alcohol applies to me to. I can guarantee you, there was no threats of violence no yelling, nothing. Even he agrees he remembers very little of that night (like he does not remembers having dinner but we did) and he does not even remember why he called the cops. I did nothing that warranted something like that. We both agree on that. You did nothing that warranted calling the police but you both were drunk and in your own words he can't fully remember what was going on. Let it go. The next time you both want to drink, control your consumption or don't drink at all. Calling the cops was probably a good thing. I grew up with parents that were drinkers. Both would be drunk and she would nag him to eat and he would get pissed at her telling him what to do. It always escalated. It would be one thing if he called the police and made all sorts of accusations. He called the police because of a verbal fight -- and you both were doing just that. When I read this, I thought this was about drunken 20 year olds, then you said you're 36 and he's 45. You both should be mature enough to know what your limits are. And the next time he's drunk, leave him alone. He will eat when he wants to. You're not his mother nor can you have/can there be a reasonable discussion with people that are intoxicated. Edited December 1, 2014 by Zahara 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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