Breadcrumbs

[ARMicheals]

So, I've been lurking for a while. The ex and I broke up 2 months ago. Nothing that hasn't been read here a thousand times before ....."I love you deeply" and 24 hours later a sociopathic text on how it's "too complicated" and we have to end our relationship.(classy, huh? A text followed by an IM the next day).

 

I immediately went NC. Which is tough to do when you work for the same company. Luckily... different offices.

 

Over the last 8 weeks... I've gotten some "breadcrumbs". I have not responded to any of them in the slightest bit. You don't want to be part of my life... fine, you are no longer part of my life. I'm not saying it's easy...it's not but then I started thinking.... breadcrumbs...

 

WHAT A FREAKING INSULT.....BREADCRUMBS.... how DARE he think I am so pathetic that he throw breadcrumbs at me and expects me to respond!

 

They really are an insult. Remember that the next time one of your ex's breadcrumb texts or emails or IM's or FB posts.... they are insulting you. They are basically thinking you are weak and pathetic and are grateful for the "breadcrumb" of attention they are throwing you.

 

I guarantee you... thinking of it that way... you will have no desire to respond!

[youngnlove89]

So, I've been lurking for a while. The ex and I broke up 2 months ago. Nothing that hasn't been read here a thousand times before ....."I love you deeply" and 24 hours later a sociopathic text on how it's "too complicated" and we have to end our relationship.(classy, huh? A text followed by an IM the next day).

 

I immediately went NC. Which is tough to do when you work for the same company. Luckily... different offices.

 

Over the last 8 weeks... I've gotten some "breadcrumbs". I have not responded to any of them in the slightest bit. You don't want to be part of my life... fine, you are no longer part of my life. I'm not saying it's easy...it's not but then I started thinking.... breadcrumbs...

 

WHAT A FREAKING INSULT.....BREADCRUMBS.... how DARE he think I am so pathetic that he throw breadcrumbs at me and expects me to respond!

 

They really are an insult. Remember that the next time one of your ex's breadcrumb texts or emails or IM's or FB posts.... they are insulting you. They are basically thinking you are weak and pathetic and are grateful for the "breadcrumb" of attention they are throwing you.

 

I guarantee you... thinking of it that way... you will have no desire to respond!

 

I wish I could think of it that way. My ex contacted me after he said he just wants to be friends. Then I started ignoring him and he said that since I'm ignoring him that I must've just used him for sex. It makes me mad and sad at the same time.

 

Do you find it difficult ignoring your ex? How do you do it?

[ARMicheals]

I wish I could think of it that way. My ex contacted me after he said he just wants to be friends. Then I started ignoring him and he said that since I'm ignoring him that I must've just used him for sex. It makes me mad and sad at the same time.

 

Do you find it difficult ignoring your ex? How do you do it?

 

Honestly? Some days are harder than others. But when I get an email...I permanently delete it so I don't re-read it, obsess over it or am tempted to respond.

 

Now that I've put the "breadcrumbs" into proper perspective... I get angry when I get them.

 

You're ex doesn't want to be your "friend". He doesn't want you to hate him because then he with feel bad about himself (my guess is that you were his cheerleader?). Don't be his "friend". You are opening yourself up to a boatload of hurt...it's like hitting yourself in the head with a hammer and expecting him to care that you are doing it. He doesn't want to be your friend...he just doesn't want you to hate him and it's selfish for him to ask.

 

Next time he asks just say "I'm not your enemy, but I don't want to be your friend". Remember ....breadcrumbs....and you are better than that... you deserve the whole loaf.