[DanSh]

Me and my ex bf of 9mths have been broken up for 2 months now hes 25 and I'm 24. He broke up with me bc he said he said I never let him do the things he wanted to do like go out with his friends. I always did the reason I would get mad is bc he would make plans with me then break them last minute. So ever since we broke up we've talked every other day and hung out a lot. I did all the stupid things like asking if we would ever go back out n stuff and he just told me I kept pressuring him. I went to a family bbq with him last weekend, we had a great time and he kept telling me that he loved me but he got mad at me bc I talked to one of his friends which I find so ridiculous. After that we all went out to a bar where he sat and talked to this girl all night right in front of me to get me back for talking to his friend. The next day he apologized and told me he did it to be spiteful. He said that he never loved anyone like he loves me but I get him too stressed out. He said hes afraid to go back out bc he thinks the same thing will happen again. Anyway I told him i loved him one last time and left. The next day he called bc i left clothes at his house. We ended up fighting about me talking to his friend again. I flipped out on him and told him he was the one who was disrespectful for talking to that girl in front of me. I called him a lot of nasty things which I think he deserved. He said he doesn't care anymore n that we're not going to talk. I agreed and told him to grow up. I picked up my stuff and that was it.

I know he loves me I just don't understand how he can go so hot and cold like this. He knows hes hurting me but refusing to think he did anything wrong. He acts like everything is my fault. I just don't get it I know I'm stupid for even wanting him back but I really do love him. Do you think he'll ever try to contact me again? Sorry for the long post but it feels like even though we've been broken up for 2 months we broke up all over again- do you think no contact will work? All advice no matter how harsh would be greatly appreciated! ... Meanwhile, i'd like to share this blog with you - http://newmywhymenleavesite.com/articles/

I'll update you later...

[dylan797]

Id say you two have some issues you need to work out. Sounds like your both being quite immature, no offence. If he has plans with you and breaks it off to be with his friends, dont get angry. Give him that time to do his own thing. Its kind of clingy to get upset as bout such things. its easy to feel rejected when your bf/gf does that but its not a rejection of you. As for the talking to his friend and getting spiteful, he needs to grow up. What does he think is happening? Your trying to hook up with his friend right in front of him? Hes being ridiculous. He'll contact you. When he does, just say the both of you need to mellow out. Trust each other, and dont just say it, do it. Your issues arent that serious...its typical of a relationship thats still pretty new. 8 months isnt that long.

[WTRanger]

No, it won't make him miss you.

There needs to be NC 101 that everyone has to pass before being able to post on here. NC is NOT about making someone miss you. It's for you and you alone. It's for you to get over them and move on with your life.

It also sounds like you two are polar opposites and you haven't tried to fix what broke you two up in the first place. So guess what? You'll just repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

[Nohbody]

There will be a quiz following the reading lesson:
http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t81399/

[just_scott]

no contact can verry well make him miss you ,depends on how strong your relationship was and how much feelings he had towards you

[WTRanger]

Originally Posted by just_scott

no contact can verry well make him miss you ,depends on how strong your relationship was and how much feelings he had towards you

This post is a F minus for the quiz over the classic reading Nohbody posted.

Once again, for all of the thick heads out there, NC is NOT about making someone miss you. Plain and simple. If you use NC right, you won't give 2 craps if they miss you since you'll have moved on with your life.

[just_scott]

no matter if youre the dumpee or the dumper you spend good quality time with someone and make memories ,all of a suddenyou go no contact your gonna think about the other person EVEN miss them,doesn't mean your gonna contact them and reconsile but you will miss the person
no contact is just a agame of wills anyways see who breaks down first and makes contact and the other see's what the other person has to say

[Nohbody]

Lurch brings up a point.

No Contact is viewed by many people as a game of wills, exactly as stated.

The original intent of No Contact (espoused by Cali Guy, No Foolin' and other venerable ancestors) is, for lack of a better phrase, to heal your broken heart. That's it. It's to get you over the person, over the relationship, and moving on with your life. There is no game, because when NC runs its course you don't want to play anymore.

Someone should make a longer post about this, but it's not going to be me, not right now.

Where do second chances come in? That's where Homebrew's insanity begins to come in - and THAT is too big an issue for me to even begin to address...