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Can't get a date..


In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

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Old 25th March 2019, 1:46 PM   #31
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The quicker the better.

Go & have fun. All you are there to figure out at that meet is whether you want an actual date.
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Old 25th March 2019, 11:57 PM   #32
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Practice isn't the perfect word but think about what a date is . . .

It's an outing where two people talk & enjoy some pleasant conversation. It's a try out to see if it's worth doing again worth trying to pursue something.

I do understand the downside of a date with somebody you already know is unsuitable. All 3 of my dates from OLD were that but there were upsides to the outings too. I learned things. I discovered new restaurants. I better understood myself. Mostly I learned that what I thought I knew about a person from the profile wasn't necessarily true.

After we started dating having met IRL, I made a fake profile to check out the profile my husband had up on another site. Honestly, I never would have looked at him twice based on that profile & picture. So OLD vs RL . . .take a chance.
I totally agree with this. Quagmire, do you hope to go from socially awkward one-on-one to your best WITHOUT some practice. It won't be like you are using the people, hopefully getting better at dating and socializing with the knowledge that it's a numbers game and there's a chance you might me the right one along the way. You will better understand yourself like donavin said, learn about new things to talk about, improve your social skills, learn more about girls.

About the weather talk. See that just shows that you need more practice. It's a lead-in. It means nothing HOWEVER it's just a way to start a conversation with someone, find a way to bond and if you not LITERAL about things, you use it as a jump off point to take the conversation in a more interesting direction. Weather is something we all experience together in the same region--so it's really a mild attempt to bond and it's your choice to expand on it or shut it down. When you are trying to connect with people (or improve your social skills), you take the moment to bond and show off your ability to connect, humor, understand others, tell something about yourself, whatever. Be playful. With a lot of people, turn talking about the weather into a little inside joke. Idk, any communication is just a way to express yourself and who you are. If it's not your ideal subject, you can still make it an ideal expression of YOU. And use it as a stepping stone to making the conversation better content and still an ideal expression of you.
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Everybody's like: He's no item,Please don't like em, He don't wife em, He one nights em,I never listened No. I shoulda figured though. All that sh*t you was spittin',So unoriginal, But it was you. So I was with it. Then tell you the truth, Wish we never did it. If you was really the realest, Wouldn't be fightin' it.I think your pride is just...In the way
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Old 30th March 2019, 11:08 AM   #33
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The eHarmony one fell through. I wasn't thinking it was a good match anyways. The Bumble matches never responded. The Match one I set up a meeting for Monday at a local restaurant. We'll see how that goes.
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Old 1st April 2019, 10:06 PM   #34
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So we met up and I feel it went well. It was a little awkward at first getting a conversation going. We ended up meeting for about 2.5 hours. I planted the seed of meeting up a second time. Not sure what my next steps are and when should I message and arrange a second date.
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Old 2nd April 2019, 10:59 AM   #35
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I planted the seed of meeting up a second time. Not sure what my next steps are and when should I message and arrange a second date.
Did she text to tell you she had a nice time? That is usually the signal for she wants you to ask her on a 2nd date.

I'm not good with this texting business. I would expect you wait 2-3 days, then call her & ask her for a date 2-3 days later. Basically If you went out on Saturday you call on Tuesday & ask her out for Thursday or Friday. That said most people find calls intrusive & if they don't hear from somebody within 24 hours they conclude the guy is not interested. I'll let somebody younger then me clarify those timing issues.

At the very least you need to reach out via text & say something. Ask how her week is going or follow up on something you were talking about. The key is to make contact.
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Old 2nd April 2019, 9:39 PM   #36
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I had already sent a message via the Match app. No response yet. I wasn't sure how long to wait. I didn't want to do it too quickly and seem clingy but not wait too long and seem uninterested.
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Old 3rd April 2019, 9:22 PM   #37
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It's been over 24 hours and no response. Maybe I should have texted instead of message through the app? She usually responded right away but hasn't read the message yet. We never really texted.
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Old 3rd April 2019, 11:58 PM   #38
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It's been over 24 hours and no response. Maybe I should have texted instead of message through the app? She usually responded right away but hasn't read the message yet. We never really texted.
Realistically, she's not interested. If she was, she would have texted you by now. That's life, she's not the only girl in town.... be strong.
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Old 4th April 2019, 7:43 AM   #39
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I sent the message in the app. According to the read receipt, she hasn't read it. I have her phone number so I could have texted instead but she always responded right away in the app. I guess if she was interested she would have checked the app or read the message. I can never gauge these things. We talked for about 2.5 hours. It seemed to go well.
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